posted August 11, 2017 05:30 PM            

So I never really understood why people would think nothing of entering a relationship when they knew it was just a short term thing. They knew they wouldn't marry them or end up together forever.

posted August 11, 2017 09:01 PM            

I googled "astrology, thrill seeker" and landed on several different descriptions of Sun in Sagittarius.

It's going to be more complex than Sun sign alone, though Sag is often regarded as the Master of Free Spirit. For sure, that spirit could be manifested through other planetary bodies in addition to the Sun

posted August 11, 2017 11:30 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
I personally couldn't enter into a relationship with someone if I felt as though I wouldn't be with them forever. Guess that's why I've also never had one. I can't see the point of being with someone if it wasn't going to lead anywhere and love is a rare thing.

So I never really understood why people would think nothing of entering a relationship when they knew it was just a short term thing. They knew they wouldn't marry them or end up together forever.

---

I could have written this word for word. I feel the exact same way! I'm 19 and ridin' solo for a few years cause I feel like there's more to life than a relationship status. Not to mention, the vast majority of guys 19-26 are still super immature and I'm only attracted to serious, mature, calm, stable, loyal guys. Many young men nowadays simply fail to understand that loyalty, commitment, honesty and affection are priorities and not options. Half of them just wanna get laid, then they're gone the next day ... I can be very insecure, so such rejection would probably feel worse than death to me. Therefore, I would not be caught dead putting myself in such a situation.

Plus, I wouldn't see the point in dating anyone who I'm not 100% certain is my future husband/the future father of my children, soo .. yeah. LOL. Call me crazy, but that's just how serious my outlook on romantic relationships is.

I'll enjoy being TeamSingle for 3-4 years! Freedom & independence above all!

Do you have any fixed personal planets? What aspects are made to your Venus?

------------------
Leo Sun/Mercury
Sagittarius Moon
Cancer Venus/Mars/Rising

posted August 12, 2017 12:04 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
I can't see the point of being with someone if it wasn't going to lead anywhere and love is a rare thing.

---

I look at them as learning experiences, failed relationships often help you figure out what you want and don't want.

posted August 12, 2017 12:35 AM            

I was the same way. (See if there are any similarities in your chart to mine.) I want my primary love relationship to be an important life structure. It's just the way some of us are.

I've recently learned from Indian homeopath Dr Rajan Sankaran's work the three natural kingdoms from which we all derive our individualities: Plant, Animal, and Mineral. The Mineral kingdom relates to structure, desire to build and layer life structures over time, fears relating to loss of such life structures or the weakening of structures within ourselves. It gives me a lot of insight as to how people I know can handle those changes much better. It's not that they don't feel very lonely without someone to love or feel heartbroken when it doesn't work out, but that have a different essence inside them for dealing with it.

Mineral (earth, Saturnine) folks are foundational. We stabilize. Others lean on us when things get crazy for them. Sometimes I can feel more like a cracked tile than a real foundation, but I do my best.

Maybe you can relate to that.

posted August 12, 2017 02:35 AM            

I know Gemini/Libra/Libra Moon/Venus to be the type who dont mind those types of arrangements. Even on occassion Sag/Pisc Moon/Venus.

Do u have Moon/Venus in aspect to Saturn/Pluto?

posted August 12, 2017 04:34 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
I personally couldn't enter into a relationship with someone if I felt as though I wouldn't be with them forever. Guess that's why I've also never had one. I can't see the point of being with someone if it wasn't going to lead anywhere and love is a rare thing.

---

I know how you feel (Taurus Venus), I think the problem is you'll only find those types of relationships once your older.

By then your too occupied.

Its very different for a guy because a guy can say why bother and decide to spend more time on career development.

I think being single for a female is much worse then for a male, A guy has alot more options/distractions being single, females not so much.

Complement to everyone else that has replied to this thread. I'm glad everyone thinks deeply and isn't shallow.

posted August 12, 2017 07:39 AM            

GrandFireT - I have my Venus in Gemini. I am never fickle with matters of the heart.

Leo-Cancer98 - Im 39. The men I date are still super immature. It never changes.

Do I have fixed personal planets? Do I ever. Sun Taurus/Moon and Asc in Scorpio. All square my Venus in Gemini.

vertiver - I have had ENOUGH experience. A bit like being a student FOREVER. Sometimes you just want the job now to make the money. If you get my analogy.

Kannon McAfee - I have a Saturn in Leo. Maybe us too? How random. I am a Homoeopath too!

Aries23Degrees - I have Venus Trine Pluto which both sextile my Saturn?

DualGemV2 - I am older! Now when I meet men, they have been there and down that and just really are looking for a "good time".

posted August 12, 2017 08:45 AM            

These two can contribute. But I have to consider aspects of Saturn/Pluto to Sun/Moon.

Saturn dries things up and can seem humorless.
Pluto can insist on depth/closeness in connections. And both these can struggle with "lightness" in approach to most things.

posted August 12, 2017 11:49 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Leo-Cancer98:
I could have written this word for word. I feel the exact same way! I'm 19 and ridin' solo for a few years cause I feel like there's more to life than a relationship status. Not to mention, the vast majority of guys 19-25 are still super immature and I'm only attracted to serious, mature, calm, stable, loyal guys. Many young men nowadays simply fail to understand that loyalty, commitment, honesty and affection are priorities and not options. Half of them just wanna get laid, then they're gone the next day ... I can be very insecure, so such rejection would probably feel worse than death to me. Therefore, I would not be caught dead putting myself in such a situation.

Plus, I wouldn't see the point in dating anyone who I'm not 100% certain is my future husband/the future father of my children, soo .. yeah. LOL. Call me crazy, but that's just how serious my outlook on romantic relationships is.

I'll enjoy being TeamSingle for 3-4 years! Freedom & independence above all!

Do you have any fixed personal planets? What aspects are made to your Venus?

---

posted August 12, 2017 01:37 PM            

I also wonder if Venus being out of bounds contributes.

As i mentioned however, Pluto is very serious in matters of close personal relations. They don't take anything for granted and can insist on everything or nothing.

Mercury/Pluto may also add to you seeing most people as fickle/ changeable. Words others say leave an impression(Moon/Mercury contra parrallel)

Prog Moon/natal Pluto parallel. Good news is progressed Venus is conjunct and parallel natal Mars(ruler of your 1st house).

This suggests that you may begin to look a little more yummy or attract attention from some people due to your more "amiable" outlook.

posted August 12, 2017 10:41 PM            

Sun is square Saturn in fixed signs. That indicates a person of ambition or serious outlook, and usually indicates a slowing of the life tempo, especially with Moon in fixed sign Scorpio. And Venus is sextile Saturn. So yes, I think those kinds of factors match what you are describing that I can relate to.

It is better to see it as delaying such serious close relationships to the appropriate moment in life when you are ready and the right person appears. Don't think of it as 'lack of' relationships.

And yes, Sun and Venus at 29° of their signs can play a role in delaying relationships through a 'cuspy' tendency to indecision about the way in which to proceed.
Do I go it alone and keep things steady and stable [sun/taurus] or actually go full on into companionship [gemini] and figure out how to live that life?
Do I remain cerebral and surface in my appreciation of others [venus/gemini], or do I connect deeply, possibly becoming more sentimental and bonded [cancer]?

posted August 13, 2017 12:11 AM            

Once in California she explored many new ideas that she hungered for (Gemini ASC with the Jupiter-ruled third decan Aries sun and mercury) and her Libra Neptune allowed her to mix easily with "nature children" and other alternative folks. She ended up having different children by different fathers and never married anyone her entire life. She was devoted to treating her kids right, however, though she found it too challenging to raise kids as a single mother in a society that generally spat on her, and the hippie commune which was supposed to help her with her kids was not what it was advertised to be (which her kids, including my mom, have terrible memories of, and Granny is quite scathing about describing it as well).

posted August 13, 2017 12:35 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:
Thank you for your replies.

Do you think that having my Sun and Venus both at 29 degrees might have anything to do with it too?

---

I'm an Aries Sun, Gemini Moon/Venus/SN.

I wanted what you've described. I envy those who found their partners at a young age, and had it last (and be happy). My observations of relationships around me, growing up, were of mostly unhealthy relationships. That's why being in one, was never my first priority. I was a romantic, and felt sure that it would happen for me - I wasn't rushing out, and trying to force it. I've mostly attracted unhealthy men, and that wasn't what I wanted.

The two worst guys in my life have been Taureans. Supposedly stable (not), they were a mess. And they messed with people's heads, including my own. They were mostly an earth/water mix, one had air (but not much).

posted August 13, 2017 12:50 AM            

Furthermore, many are raised to hide their true selves, or even falsely advertise who they are (and they may come to mistake their mask for their true self) by their peers and parents growing up, and this dishonesty is then applied in trying to snag a life partner, which of course is begging for all sorts of problems (though I think it's common for both sides to do it to each other, hoping by the time the jig is up the other person is too ensnared to get away). As society often overlooks or even denigrates love that isn't passionate (such as for best friends, pets, extended family, etc) then they're alienated and lonely, which in turns creates a desperation to fill that loneliness by any means necessary. (And others still will seek out such a relationship not out of desire, but out of a desire to please say parents or not appear weird or flawed somehow.)

I think I'm also relatively rare myself in that I've entered relationships that I otherwise wouldn't have because I expected it to be a short term fling. I've done so for experimental reasons (to learn about myself and others), boredom (though I usually ease boredom in other ways), and even just accommodating someone else who was going through a hard time (but it's not like I was distressed by it in any way). Though if you're thinking I'm like Samantha Jones in Sex and the City, or otherwise leaping bed to bed in abandon, or that I don't practice some strict ethics (though ethics in which sexual behavior is incidental to the ethics, as opposed to sexual behavior for its own sake), then think again.

And then there was a relationship that, for years, I thought was forever, and it's worth describing a bit here. That partner had an Aries stellium (plus sun and ASC, and the stellium were personal planets) and Sag stellium. She (yes, this was a lesbian relationship) was certainly fiery and assertive enough (her hypocrisy of demanding monogamy while seeming unable to give it not withstanding). But she came from a background of her mother (after this Aries/Sag deluxe was born) married into an abusive family that treated her horribly (even breaking her arm when I think she was 10) which caused her to despise them, her mother, and probably the institution of marriage.

The only way she found acceptance among her peers (as she was racially mixed) was through competitive sports, and that encouraged heavily competitive and reckless behavior, and she was also raised on about constant adrenaline, be it the sports she engaged in, the horrible neighborhood (South Los Angeles), and the constant violent hostility of her family, which I think made her hooked on that adrenaline and risk (which her astrological placements would certainly encourage). I believe this is what made her such a cheater, as it was risk, competition, and adrenaline, though the Sag and Aries can love the passion and freedom as well (not that I "blame" the Sag and Aries placements), while also fearing being rejected (as her family and many peers did).

So that fell apart and I was shattered by it, though there were many who wanted to make me theirs after it was clearly over between us. I wasn't about to get into another relationship, not only because I was hurting too much and had to sort my thoughts and feelings out, but also because I felt it was too likely that such a person would be a "rebound" person that I didn't want to hurt that way. However, one person wasn't interested in such a relationship, but did want to fool around, and I had many reasons to believe it to be nothing more than a fling and so went along with it (though it turned out to not be the case, and had I known she had a Scorpio Mars and Venus along with Cancer moon then I'd have pushed her away as well without anything starting).

posted August 13, 2017 01:00 AM            

But I see the stars as potential, not the entire explanation. Had I been born in Japan, for example, I could see myself being a very different person, though it could still be described within the astrological context. Indeed, I've gone through some big changes (as so many do) over the years, and yet these radical changes did not violate the description of my chart. I do not believe that if you throw a child out to be raised by wolves will turn out the same as one raised in a loving home with lots of opportunity. The stars are potential, and the environment works on that potential. Linda Goodman believed that as well which is why she wrote a book that gives advice on how to raise a child based on their sun sign (often mentioning how moon sign, etc, can affect it) to bring out the best in them.

In my case, I spent time being raised by Granny whom I described above in a previous post (who by that time was much more stable and provided a loving home) and also my parents who were dysfunctional and far from loving. Therefore, Granny being so independent appealed to me more than the horrible marriage of my parents (which got far worse during the divorce). My mix of Sag and Libra also contribute to my highly philosophical nature, and a matrilineal society strikes me as much more sensible than the patrilineal society we live in now, even in the case of marriage (which I could write a long paragraph on but will spare you), which makes marriage a lot less important to me on a personal level.

Of course my Libra energy is social that seeks harmony among many (and though Libra seeks balance and harmony, it helps to have many choices--not necessarily romantic, mind you, but can be--available so I can find the perfect counterbalance that I need, and my third house also appreciates variety), while my Sag does not like, and only rarely tolerates, any smothering behavior, someone trying to be my shadow, etc. Sag being in the fifth house also, I think, contributes to my confidence as well as independence (though I'm social).

The media I chose (as opposed to what is common) also helped in this. Girls shunned me from an early age (it had more to do with parents not wanting their girls exposed to my family, or the bad habits I'd formed as a result, like how I played with dolls and used profanity) which got me with the boys more, who had a lot more interests than playing "house." The books I read were often of independent girls, sometimes even living on their own, and I believed I "imprinted romantically" from a book I could name that showed a woman in charge and independent that a man chased, and the woman's life and career finally made room for him rather than him being the center of it. Some of the shows I watched with the boys (like Eerie, Indiana) showed the male characters more interested in competing for females than females did for being courted or dating in any way, and this all trained by brain to think of my future role as a woman in a different way from most girls (and boys, too).

I remember loving "game books" as a child in which the reader makes choices for a character. This means turning to the page that represents your choice and reading from there, and thus many endings are possible. I was excited when I discovered some were aimed at female audiences, but they invariably were about finding a guy, either to save me and the kingdom (or whatever), or even for its own sake. I felt this lessened the character and I went back to those for a general audience (which was presumed male). My brain had already rejected seeing myself as that way, and as a result I don't see myself as needing someone to "save" or "complete" me, and that makes such relationships less important or needing to be "all or nothing."

This would continue with the scifi and fantasy I got into as I got older in which females were typically equal to men (and could lead armies, intrigue with the best, display heroism, and likewise male characters could be fops, nurturing healers and idealists, and the like, and there was nothing wrong with that, and this didn't make the females "less of a woman" or the males "less of a man"), and romances within these stories were generally secondary (and just as important, or unimportant, to the men as the women). This trained my mind to think of my power and purpose being in the world rather than in men, and that alone makes me different from many women right there, and certainly affects how I value things like dating, which is less than a lot of other people (especially Libra).

posted August 13, 2017 08:14 AM            

In comparison, my boyfriend has Gemini venus and has been in plenty of relationships (both poly and mono). I used to ask him how he does it, to tell someone he loves them if he wasn't even sure they were gonna last long. He says it's because he wants to experience all kinds of relationships until he finds the one that suits him.

------------------
Gemini Rising
Sun in Leo (2nd house)
Moon in Cancer (1st house)
Mercury in Virgo (3rd house conj.)
Venus in Virgo (3rd house)
Mars in Libra (5th house)