Author
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Topic: Understanding the Virgo Moon
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Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 14, 2018 02:41 PM
My boyfriend and I have quincunx moons, by sign and degree. Mine in Aries, his in Virgo. Naturally, if someone's needs are not loud and in my face, I won't register them. So I've always seen my boyfriend as sort of an enigma - he doesn't really talk about emotions, ever. I've wondered if I just don't bring it out of him, but he doesn't seem to be comfortable talking about anyone else's emotions either. So, okay! I think, he's just so level headed that he doesn't need any kind of emotional support -- that's fine... but I'll never truly believe it. Months go by. Years. He is even keeled. Until, one day, he gets home from work and starts going crazy with the tape measure, frantically trying to make the measurements for a desk made out of a single sheet of plywood fit a space in our new bedroom (we don't have furniture yet and he insists on making it all out of plywood). We bicker a little about the size. I walk out of the room to start making dinner and come back to find him curled up in a ball, hoodie covering his face, completely silent. Of course, I immediately felt awful, thinking that I had perhaps been too blunt with my opinions about the desk and maybe he'd had a bad day. I curled up next to him, preparing to give him the emotional support I'd never thought he would need. I waited. I listened. And then it came: Everything was in disarray, chaos . He couldn't get to any of his stuff because it was all in boxes, somewhere. He didn't have an efficient workspace. He wouldn't have time to organize everything before he got too busy with school. On went the list of reasons why nothing would ever be organized again. It had driven him to curl up into a ball, in the same way that perceived restrictions on my freedom drive me to curl up into a ball. He needs organization. And all those times I helped cleaned up a little, when my Virgo Mars helped him organize his room just because - that was emotional support for him. Luckily, my being raised by a Virgo 6H stellium mother, means those things come easily to me. In fact, I knew exactly what needed to be done, and was confused about how he could be so lost in it (Virgo Mars vs. Virgo Moon?). So after dinner I exacted part 1 of my plan - simply clearing off both desks - and I could feel him start to breathe again. Today, I will surprise him with part 2  IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 4887 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted January 14, 2018 05:54 PM
Bravo Aries Moon.  I wonder if your two moons make declination aspects. Virgo Moons sense of security comes from having a plan and/or strategy. They feel safe when they know what to do. And part of knowing what to do for them is being organized. Either through making a list or having a routine. The worst can be when things are in disarray. Especially feeling that way internally .This can bring a sense of being "overwhelmed". By helping him organize the finer details, u are easing the load.
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Yanmorg Knowflake Posts: 1763 From: Registered: Feb 2013
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posted January 14, 2018 10:29 PM
My boyfriend has a Virgo Moon and mars, opposite Saturn.He’s very stoic, serious, but still spontaneous in his self-expression (Mercury opposite Uranus/ Neptune). It drives my analytical Scorpio mercury crazy. I understand your frustration completely. Sometimes my anxiety takes over because I can’t read him which is very unusual for me. I can read a stick on a tree if it moves a certain way! Virgo moons are very practical. That earth nature is supported by attention to details and perfectionism. His Virgo Moon, mars is in the 10th so I sort of play an emotionally supportive role behind the scenes while he fights for public recognition and respect.
Nothing shakes him up emotionally except his ambitions. As soon as he feels out of control or losing focus, he starts to go batshit crazy (overanalyzing everything, creating this doom and gloom scenario, etc). As long as he’s on a path to success (wherever it may go. I don’t think he really cares), his life is in order. I haven’t figured out if it’s more comforting or disheartening knowing women aren’t a major influence emotionally, at least not directly. I make sure everything around is neat, clean, and organized. I stay on top of all household duties so when he’s done overanalyzing the world and his career (10th house Virgo moon), he can come home to a “Virgo-Friendly” atmosphere which keeps his stress level down and makes him smitten. He might not necessarily care that I do these things, but he definitely appreciates it. IP: Logged |
hypatia238 Moderator Posts: 7932 From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode Registered: Sep 2014
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posted January 15, 2018 12:58 AM
quote: Originally posted by Selenite: My boyfriend and I have quincunx moons, by sign and degree. Mine in Aries, his in Virgo. Naturally, if someone's needs are not loud and in my face, I won't register them. So I've always seen my boyfriend as sort of an enigma - he doesn't really talk about emotions, ever. I've wondered if I just don't bring it out of him, but he doesn't seem to be comfortable talking about anyone else's emotions either. So, okay! I think, he's just so level headed that he doesn't need any kind of emotional support -- that's fine... but I'll never truly believe it. Months go by. Years. He is even keeled. Until, one day, he gets home from work and starts going crazy with the tape measure, frantically trying to make the measurements for a desk made out of a single sheet of plywood fit a space in our new bedroom (we don't have furniture yet and he insists on making it all out of plywood). We bicker a little about the size. I walk out of the room to start making dinner and come back to find him curled up in a ball, hoodie covering his face, completely silent. Of course, I immediately felt awful, thinking that I had perhaps been too blunt with my opinions about the desk and maybe he'd had a bad day. I curled up next to him, preparing to give him the emotional support I'd never thought he would need. I waited. I listened. And then it came: Everything was in disarray, chaos . He couldn't get to any of his stuff because it was all in boxes, somewhere. He didn't have an efficient workspace. He wouldn't have time to organize everything before he got too busy with school. On went the list of reasons why nothing would ever be organized again. It had driven him to curl up into a ball, in the same way that perceived restrictions on my freedom drive me to curl up into a ball. He needs organization. And all those times I helped cleaned up a little, when my Virgo Mars helped him organize his room just because - that was emotional support for him. Luckily, my being raised by a Virgo 6H stellium mother, means those things come easily to me. In fact, I knew exactly what needed to be done, and was confused about how he could be so lost in it (Virgo Mars vs. Virgo Moon?). So after dinner I exacted part 1 of my plan - simply clearing off both desks - and I could feel him start to breathe again. Today, I will surprise him with part 2 
Beautiful. You got me teary with your story, thank you for sharing. This is so beautifully written too. True love. 
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hypatia238 Moderator Posts: 7932 From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode Registered: Sep 2014
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posted January 15, 2018 01:07 AM
Selenite you are sooooo cool. IP: Logged |
GrandFireT Knowflake Posts: 208 From: Out There Registered: Dec 2016
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posted January 15, 2018 03:53 PM
To what extend, if any, do the comments here about Virgo Moon people apply to a person who has a Virgo Venus, but Moon in another sign??IP: Logged |
Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 15, 2018 07:47 PM
Aww Hypatia aren't you a virgo moon too? IP: Logged |
Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 15, 2018 07:50 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Bravo Aries Moon.  I wonder if your two moons make declination aspects. Virgo Moons sense of security comes from having a plan and/or strategy. They feel safe when they know what to do. And part of knowing what to do for them is being organized. Either through making a list or having a routine. The worst can be when things are in disarray. Especially feeling that way internally .This can bring a sense of being "overwhelmed". By helping him organize the finer details, u are easing the load.
@Aries23 No declinations, and his moon also squares my Sag Sun. But we do have nice aspects from Moon to the outer planets, and my moon is conjunct his IC & NN It's funny cuz as a Sag I just don't think about details at all, so they don't overwhelm me. I assume it'll just get figured out, which of course leads to faults as well. IP: Logged |
Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 15, 2018 08:03 PM
quote: Originally posted by Yanmorg:
Sometimes my anxiety takes over because I can’t read him which is very unusual for me. I can read a stick on a tree if it moves a certain way!
ohhh, me too. that's part of the appeal, though. Never gets boring trying to figure him out... quote: I haven’t figured out if it’s more comforting or disheartening knowing women aren’t a major influence emotionally, at least not directly.
LOL, I know what you mean! my fire placements know what you mean. But, he's a Taurus with 5th house placements, and the lover is in there, for sure. It's just more of an actions over words thing  quote:
I make sure everything around is neat, clean, and organized. I stay on top of all household duties so when he’s done overanalyzing the world and his career (10th house Virgo moon), he can come home to a “Virgo-Friendly” atmosphere which keeps his stress level down and makes him smitten. He might not necessarily care that I do these things, but he definitely appreciates it.
Yes. I've been doing this sort of unconsciously, glad to know it's what makes him tick
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Melinn Knowflake Posts: 303 From: Sweden Registered: Jul 2017
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posted January 16, 2018 05:43 AM
Awww it's so great how you know how to support him even though his so closed down! <3This is why I love astrology! How one can use it as psychology, using it to read the persons and know the persons emotional needs, thats what drove me to astrology in the first place. You having Mars in Virgo certainly is an amazing support as your actios is in the manner that will give him support! How awesome and perfect! Hope he will be able to relax and open up more in time IP: Logged |
Melinn Knowflake Posts: 303 From: Sweden Registered: Jul 2017
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posted January 16, 2018 05:48 AM
It amazes me how much alike Capricorn and Virgo are! How both needs order and control of their environment. I have Virgos asc, and Moon, Mars in 10th oppo Saturn, so a very capricornian moon. I also have Taurus sun but I feel like as said Virgo and Capricorn is more alike and Taurus is on its own you know.And it scares me a bit also, having this Virgo asc, because it seems to taint everything in my chart! I mean, I have Only Virgo Asc and no planets there, not even in progressed. But when I read about Virgo Moon, Virgo Venuse, Mars etc I have all the Virgo traits for all the inner planets! It's scary! Asc sign really does effect ALL the planets in ones chart! Or it does for me, dunno how its for you guys? Maybe I should start a thread about this? IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees Knowflake Posts: 4887 From: South Africa Registered: Dec 2012
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posted January 16, 2018 08:08 AM
@Selenite.I know what you mean. I also am Sag Sun and Aries Asc and can get annoyed with too much detail. But in order to understand their standpoint, find your inner Virgo. And that means looking for a Virgo on the house cusp. In my case it wasn't easy finding that. Even the house with Virgo as the sign on the house cusp has Mars therein.So I just rush through the details. But when I look at Mercury(Virgo ruler) and see that it squares my Dsc, my Asc and conj the Mc from the 9th house,I realise that it is these areas of life that i am particular, critical and anal. So from that viewpoint I came to appreciate why Virgo is the way it is. But heaven help you if Mercury is in harsh aspects to Saturn/Neptune or Pluto. Then one can be very hard on themselves(Saturn), set unrealistic standards(Neptune) or be obsessive compulsive(Pluto). IP: Logged |
Melinn Knowflake Posts: 303 From: Sweden Registered: Jul 2017
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posted January 16, 2018 11:47 AM
quote:
So from that viewpoint I came to appreciate why Virgo is the way it is. But heaven help you if Mercury is in harsh aspects to Saturn/Neptune or Pluto. Then one can be very hard on themselves(Saturn), set unrealistic standards(Neptune) or be obsessive compulsive(Pluto).[/B]
I have Asc ruler Mercury Oppo Pluto, Trine Saturn and Neptune haha! Yes, obsessive, unrealistic and hard on myself indeed 
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hypatia238 Moderator Posts: 7932 From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode Registered: Sep 2014
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posted January 16, 2018 11:59 AM
quote: Originally posted by Selenite: Aww Hypatia aren't you a virgo moon too?
My dad is, I have sun in Virgo with Pisces Moon. Yes my father loves organization and punctuality...My partner has a stellium in the 6th house and he does too, he is good at organizing things quickly. IP: Logged |
Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2018 03:20 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: @Selenite.I know what you mean. I also am Sag Sun and Aries Asc and can get annoyed with too much detail. But in order to understand their standpoint, find your inner Virgo. And that means looking for a Virgo on the house cusp. In my case it wasn't easy finding that. Even the house with Virgo as the sign on the house cusp has Mars therein.So I just rush through the details. But when I look at Mercury(Virgo ruler) and see that it squares my Dsc, my Asc and conj the Mc from the 9th house,I realise that it is these areas of life that i am particular, critical and anal. So from that viewpoint I came to appreciate why Virgo is the way it is. But heaven help you if Mercury is in harsh aspects to Saturn/Neptune or Pluto. Then one can be very hard on themselves(Saturn), set unrealistic standards(Neptune) or be obsessive compulsive(Pluto).
Hmm. That's interesting.. Virgo starts in the 1st house and my Mars is there at 0 Virgo, opposite Pisces Saturn, square Pluto. then Virgo covers the second house with Chiron there, which is conjunct my bf's moon. my Mercury is cazimi my Sun in the 5th in Sag, and out of bounds. It is trine my moon, ASC, widely trine Mars. His moon is insane because it's in a T-square with Venus, Uranus and Jupiter. But also in a grand trine with Sun/Mercury, moon and mars. And quintile Saturn. My moon is heavily aspected too so I think that's part of why we get each other even with all the different sign energies.
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Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2018 03:32 PM
@Melinn Yes I feel it’s really helped me understand different perspectives in life, even if it isn’t totally real, it gets my brain going about possibilities..& I hope so too, if he isn’t totally opened up already. but I think this is really how he is, I mean he’s crazy and silly with me all the time, but not too into the heavy emotional convos like how my scorpio moon friends are. more into talking about philosophy & ideas.actually all the people with virgo placements I know tend to skirt away from emotional stuff. it’s alright with me  Also yes about the Cap-Virgo similarities, he has a Cap ASC and Mars, so similar to you! I mean he is totally unashamed about being a control freak, says so all the time, and outwardly devises strategies to take control of situations. Lol And I do agree about the ASC coloring everything, I think I even read that somewhere before. It would be an interesting topic. I have often felt that no matter what I do I can't get my Leo ASC traits to lay low for a while. & I also have a 5th house Sun which is the chart ruler so there’s really no escape IP: Logged |
Selenite Knowflake Posts: 1568 From: Lyra Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2018 03:37 PM
quote: Originally posted by hypatia238: My dad is, I have sun in Virgo with Pisces Moon. Yes my father loves organization and punctuality...My partner has a stellium in the 6th house and he does too, he is good at organizing things quickly.
Oh yes the Pisces moon, what degree?? Mine is progressed there at 3 & i'm trying to learn from it  IP: Logged |
hypatia238 Moderator Posts: 7932 From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode Registered: Sep 2014
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posted January 16, 2018 04:17 PM
quote: Originally posted by Selenite: Oh yes the Pisces moon, what degree?? Mine is progressed there at 3 & i'm trying to learn from it 
Its at 20 but my amor is at 8d! I mean you have 4th house influence and scorpio influence so I am sure you are very attuned with other people's emotions naturally already... Since moon in Pisces dissolves boundaries it makes it easier to become attuned emotionally to others, the lack of boundaries makes it easy to over-empathize with others so you have to learn to set emotional limits of how much you allow yourself to feel empathy for others in a sense bc is easy to get lost in the other person bc of poor boundaries but that is the key to emotional balance with a moon in pisces (e.g. emotional boundaries, engaging more with your logical mind in order to help with emotional regulation and balance). IP: Logged |
StubbornVirgo Knowflake Posts: 2275 From: Welcome to Mercury Registered: Jul 2015
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posted January 18, 2018 06:54 AM
quote: Originally posted by Aries23Degrees: Bravo Aries Moon.  I wonder if your two moons make declination aspects. Virgo Moons sense of security comes from having a plan and/or strategy. They feel safe when they know what to do. And part of knowing what to do for them is being organized. Either through making a list or having a routine. The worst can be when things are in disarray. Especially feeling that way internally .This can bring a sense of being "overwhelmed". By helping him organize the finer details, u are easing the load.
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Kannon McAfee Moderator Posts: 3108 From: Portland, OR - USA Registered: Oct 2011
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posted January 18, 2018 02:52 PM
Good for you. Well done.IP: Logged | |