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Author Topic:   Shyness
girlwiththerainysoul
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posted March 20, 2018 02:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for girlwiththerainysoul     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I was wondering if shyness is a matter of the ascendant?

more specifically I wonder if any fire or air AC person would ever be shy?

do you know any shy people who have a masculine (fire or air) rising sign?

around myself, the shyest people I know have cancer ACs..they're pretty shy grownups despite the fact that they both have an Aries sun!

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SecretGeek
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posted March 20, 2018 02:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SecretGeek     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It could be. I am relatively shy until I get to know someone or have a drink. I am fire and Cancer ASC.

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Aries23Degrees
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posted March 20, 2018 03:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aries23Degrees     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

"Shyness" to me is not a permanent position. It changes based on where one is in life.

One would consider Pisces strong people or those with lots of Neptune contacts as "shy". Because they appear so out of reach from others. And some really like being alone.

Cancer/Taurus for me are more cautious/ reserved respectively than shy. And Aqua strong people are most likely awkward than shy. They appear shy when fearing being misunderstood.

Virgo/Scorpio strong people are also the type to have their self contained personality come across as "shyness". I find them reflective/introspective more than "shy". They are careful with words.

Cap can be shy because of esteem issues but once they gain confidence. They tend to grow out of that.


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Lerena
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posted March 20, 2018 09:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lerena     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't think the Ascendant is a realistic indicator of shyness. While it may be true in some cases that the Ascendant does reflect this, there are likely other factors that come into play besides the Ascendant.

I'm shy and I have a Scorpio Ascendant, but my impression of Scorpio as a sign is Scorpio energy is not shy and Scorpio-influenced people are not often shy either. My Scorpio Ascendant might lead you to believe I'm not shy. This isn't true though.

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mirage29
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posted March 20, 2018 05:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries23

Some people are just 'a mix' ...?

I have the cooler more reticent Saturn-rx Scorpio (repressed soul! ..) opposite my very warm affectionate Venus Taurus. Got BOTH of those inside me.

And! Mars Cancer.

Some folks might never ever think that someone who can be up-front and forthright, and pursue interesting conversations with other, could actually (inside the self) feel SUCH a biting shyness. It's like something in me 'goes blind' when I think I'm on-stage "as my self."

I shrink and turn and run deep within me, to try to find 'that thing' inside that can Stand up to deliver a message (hopefully, using a script??? ..).

I kind of detest being in the limelight "AS" my own self-- unless I have something very consolidated to say. Focused.

Weird sensation to have Both.

I'm usually good at pulling other people out of their shells.... coz I 'recognize' it.

Doesn't help MEEEE though, when the shoe is on the other foot!!!!

What a Mix!! I shrink just thinking about it!!

(music) He's So Shy! (The Pointer Sisters) [3:24] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AeNHMDfD1tA

ADD ---- oh my!
I have NEVER been the "pursuer" in a romantic relationship. Ever!. .. But once a more-secure 'interest' has been established..????

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Solar_Leo_Queen
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posted March 20, 2018 07:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Solar_Leo_Queen     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Fire or air ascendants can be shy too, yes. I have met a fair amount of people where I have been quite shocked to discover they have a masculine ascendant.

A couple things I’ve noticed are,

- Chart ruler in a water house, especially the 12th
- Pluto in the 1st house because the native wants to keep their privacy regardless of having that enigma that draws people to them
- Saturn in the 1st house, the native feels like they have to keep themeselves composed in front of others to be taken seriously or gain respect
- More personal planets in water houses, especially the Sun

50-50
- Sun in the 7th house, this one is a little bit iffy to me because they are great at relating with others but it’s like you kinda have to get to know them or get close to them to see who they really are

My brother has Aquarius ascendant with Uranus (chart ruler) conjunct AC but in the 12th house. He is a very interesting person but I find him to be quite shy. He can go through life having big groups of friends for a short while and then going back to enjoying his video games and time spent alone. It’s like he wants to show himself but somehow he cannot. Even when he’s in his clique, he’s the quietest. He’ll laugh and make jokes every now and then but spend more time observing people in the group. He finds it hard to introduce himself to others. He usually waits until people introduce themselves to him. He ran away when he first met my boyfriend at my mom’s house. He is a Leo sun just like me.

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girlwiththerainysoul
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posted March 21, 2018 01:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for girlwiththerainysoul     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^
Interesting!

Thank you SLQ!

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Aries23Degrees
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posted March 21, 2018 01:53 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aries23Degrees     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@mirage29

What you described there is classic Venus-Saturn interplay. And I do get what you mean about the "script" part, bringing out other people but failing to do so with yourself etc. So well said. Well said

I do that when speaking publicly. I even quickly jot what I have to say down in point form to not go off on a tangent lol.

My mercury in 9th conjunct the Mc and parallels Jupiter. I think that and the natal Mercury/Mars square, is where I get the confidence to assert myself

I find women/gay men and men with social sensitivities to be more receptive to my conversations on a one on one basis(my Moon in 3rd conjunct the Ic)

Most people on average I find dull and uninteresting ime- unless they are emotionally intelligent,interested in a wide range of topics or I am drunk. So I guess they would consider me "shy" because I withdraw.

An interesting story with Mars in Cancer ex:

When we met ,he seemed "shy".But then when we got to talking, he got more assertive.

I met him at another public event and then he walked up to me, hugged me and kissed me on my forehead.

What surprised me was that I didn't know we were all that familiar with each other yet. And it surprised his friends too as he is not a PDA type of guy.

I think it could have been my Moon in Cancer conjunct his Mars and Venus trine his Mars, my Mars conjunct his Sun that got him feeling very familiar with me.

He acted like we were already together i.e calling me "babe","sweetheart", "love" and doing small things for me etc throughout the event.

I think in his mind, he didn't have to ask me out. He was sure that I was interested already. And we sort of "fell" into a relationship without the usual formalities of courting from that day on.

Awesome relationship that lasted 3 years. So I find what you said about not being the "pusuer" and yet precipitating the process once rapport is established true.

Cancer Mars is just cautious at first but when they feel more comfortable, they can quickly jump on you


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mirage29
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posted March 22, 2018 03:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries23 .. enjoyed your post.

You have the Mercury conjunct MC, squaring your Mars. You say the square makes your bolder?

Relished the way your Moon Cancer is sensitive and aware-enough to have 'sensed' the Mars Cancer boyfriend's energy so well (conjunct your Moon).

I have an out-of-sign (disparate) conjunction between MercurySN-Gem 27+ and Mars Cancer 2.36 H7gem.

Like you, I have a planet near MC--
Moon Virgo (conjunct MC Libra).

Mercury, Mars --
both square --
an "intercepted Moon" Virgo H(9)leo.

The Moon is at a point called 'the bendings'
(i.e. square the Nodes)
making it a 'skipped step'?
{transiting Chiron Pisces has been in an energetic grand mutable square for a while now}

{I still have to understand the implications of 'skipped steps'.}

Life has been a really hard climb for me.
'Inside' has been so repressed??? LOL.

Fought hard to come against some of the odds, and perils, to have achieved the overall stability I have reached in this life.

My go-to is to get 'intellectual'...
instead of stopping to identify the feelings I'm having 'underneath those thoughts'.

In an acting workshop I had, that's called needing to find 'congruency'--

Be able to get wet, and splash in the flows of the rivers, and not so much stranded in my head and its occupancy over bright desert sands.

Easier to run, less of an effort, more productive--
.. when you're a human being,
trekking on the 'wetted' firmer and less resistant sands on the edges of the waters.

Like SLQ was saying...
Fire Asc, 12th water, Asc ruler in water.
Placement is Sag Ascendant,
with Jupiter Cancer H8 {sextile (Moon)}.
Scorpio 12th house, and 11th house.
Pluto Leo e.o. H8

SLQ, Uranus 12th has capacity for 'radar'-- almost like they can 'inuit' what's underneath other people's perceptions.

Song for him.... and for Mars Cancer ----

(music) When He Shines (Sheena Easton) [3:48] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONZS4z1TTKk

lyric-- Moon in the morning, Sun out at night?
= Moon MC; Sun H6 just below DSC

I generally 'hold' all my relationships 'open' inside me, even if I haven't seen people in years. It's like a homecoming to see them again. Pick up where we left off, so easily.

Your QUOTE --
"Cancer Mars is just cautious at first but when they feel more comfortable, they can quickly jump on you "

Hey Now ~~~~ you're giving away our Secrets!!!

(music) Centerfold (J. Geils Band) [3:43] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqDjMZKf-wg

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arcturus90
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posted March 22, 2018 05:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for arcturus90     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm shy and have Moon square my ascendant, I don't know if that's one of the reasons... And have Moon-Saturn aspect and planets in Capricorn, I'm Pisces, Moon in Taurus... Maybe these things makes me shy

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StubbornVirgo
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posted March 23, 2018 03:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Solar_Leo_Queen:

50-50
- Sun in the 7th house, this one is a little bit iffy to me because they are great at relating with others but it’s like you kinda have to get to know them or get close to them to see who they really are

Yes, exactly!

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SoulOfABird
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posted March 23, 2018 03:59 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SoulOfABird     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I am a pretty strong indictator of an air rising that is shy. I have been and reserved since I was a child. Aquarius rising with no planetary aspects to it. I am Pisces and 12th house dominant but also Uranus dominant and 2nd dominant Aquarius. So I definitely dont think the rising sign has anything to do shyness. I know a Cancer rising guy who is a bit shy in certain situations but is a lot less shy than me and more social than me. He just gets shy when in certain moments.

------------------
I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art

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SoulOfABird
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posted March 23, 2018 04:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SoulOfABird     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Solar_Leo_Queen:
Fire or air ascendants can be shy too, yes. I have met a fair amount of people where I have been quite shocked to discover they have a masculine ascendant.

A couple things I’ve noticed are,

- Chart ruler in a water house, especially the 12th
- Pluto in the 1st house because the native wants to keep their privacy regardless of having that enigma that draws people to them
- Saturn in the 1st house, the native feels like they have to keep themeselves composed in front of others to be taken seriously or gain respect
- More personal planets in water houses, especially the Sun

50-50
- Sun in the 7th house, this one is a little bit iffy to me because they are great at relating with others but it’s like you kinda have to get to know them or get close to them to see who they really are

My brother has Aquarius ascendant with Uranus (chart ruler) conjunct AC but in the 12th house. He is a very interesting person but I find him to be quite shy. He can go through life having big groups of friends for a short while and then going back to enjoying his video games and time spent alone. It’s like he wants to show himself but somehow he cannot. Even when he’s in his clique, he’s the quietest. He’ll laugh and make jokes every now and then but spend more time observing people in the group. He finds it hard to introduce himself to others. He usually waits until people introduce themselves to him. He ran away when he first met my boyfriend at my mom’s house. He is a Leo sun just like me.


That's interesting! I think you're right, looking back all th things you listed make sense. Im like your brother! I also have a Aquarius rising , and my chart ruler, Uranus, is also in the 12th house! However, not conjunct. I can spend a lot of time alone. In fact I do. I go places by myself a lot. I go shopping by myself, to buy food by myself. I got to the Library by myself, coffee shops. I do a lot by myself and enjoy it. Although I havent ever had large groups of friends. I find that I would usually have only 1 or 2 good friends. I felt most comfortable by mystlf though, or with certain family members. Also very shy to introduce myself to others and if I am in a group setting I find myself feeling a bit out of it.

I do notice people with the chart ruler in a water house seem to be shy. Thinking back I can think of a few people I know who have their planet ruler in a water house and that makes sense.

Also I have Saturn im the 1st house and I do find myself self conscious a lot too.


------------------
I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art

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mirage29
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posted March 23, 2018 03:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
SoulOfABird ...

"I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art"

That's the answer to your first house Saturn.

You said it ALL ....
Don't Doubt It, for a single second.

Thanks for reminding me of this 'retro' song, too.

(music) Masterpiece (Sandi Patty, w scriptures) [4:05] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkuvJogGCwk

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Aries23Degrees
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posted March 25, 2018 12:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aries23Degrees     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@mirage29

Your writing reminds me of a Virgo Moon friend of mine. Lol.

He writes like he is having a conversation with himself in his head but is not aware. So he expects the person outside to just catch on to what he means(not so much what he says)

When someone fails to understand him, he is perplexed: "But I had explained myself so well?" Is his defense. As he worries about putting a message across correctly.

Virgo's are some of smartest people I know. But often they are their own worst critics-which makes success hard to come by. As they rarely feel that they deserve it(Venus/Moon here especially).

As a Drac Ven in Virgo, I understand all that. And there is always one thing I say to myself again and again when the stern inner critic starts to lecture me on not being "ready". And that is ;" get out of your own way".

But its easier said than done.I know.

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mirage29
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posted March 25, 2018 12:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aries23 ... That was perfect! Thank you soooo much for your awesome feedback. Good explainer!!

My Draco Sun is Virgo 11+

Plus... I don't know if you realize, I live in a REALLY disruptive environment. When I post here, I'm am being extremely bothered. This kind of draws me WAY INWARD, in order to 'deal' with what's happening to this body that types out my thoughts. (Trying NOT to grind my teeth right now... omigosh!!! things 'do' get extreme sometimes. LOL)

I'm so sorry if it DOES sound more 'inward' and conversing with self? ... It's like arrrghhhh, I have to go REALLY DEEP inside me, find the core-calm-pit, then draw my words up.

Like having someone with their car alarm blaring next to you-- and you're trying to be the Peace guru and Zen master OVER all of it!!

I'm so glad you're at LL.
I Value your posts, and your insights.
You are GROWING in this field, a LOT!!!
Good for you.

EDIT-- arggh. Auto-correct!!! They reword things for me. I KNOW I typed some words/grammar correctly. LOL

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SoulOfABird
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posted March 26, 2018 05:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SoulOfABird     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mirage29:
SoulOfABird ...

[b]"I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art"

That's the answer to your first house Saturn.

You said it ALL ....
Don't Doubt It, for a single second.

Thanks for reminding me of this 'retro' song, too.

(music) Masterpiece (Sandi Patty, w scriptures) [4:05] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkuvJogGCwk [/B]


Thank you so much 😊 you're so kind. Same goes to you too!

------------------
I appreciate the masterpiece that is you, because your existence alone is art

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mirage29
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posted March 26, 2018 02:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
... Thanks!

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Kannon McAfee
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posted March 26, 2018 10:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kannon McAfee     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Asc and its aspects, as well as the Moon.

Fire and air people can be shy -- generally more introverted -- if Moon, Saturn, Neptune, or Pluto are in aspect to the correct Asc degree.

For a lot of us it can also depend on mood. I have Virgo rising, but I can talk to strangers anywhere anytime, but not if I'm in a mood like I was in yesterday. It fluctuates. I also have moods where I can set anyone straight no matter how high falutin' or dominant they may seem. Just did that a couple weeks ago with a dude that interrupted a conversation I was having with someone else. Part of that is due to my Mars parallel MC and Mercury.

So shyness doesn't equate to introversion exactly and it can fluctuate depending on the mood of the person. I tend to get more overwhelmed by large noisy crowds of people unless my energy is really up. So I agree with Aries23Degrees.

------------------
Soul Stars Astrology - by the declinations guy
Declinations: because the planets move north and south of the celestial equator

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Randall
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posted April 01, 2018 06:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks, Kannon!

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