posted July 19, 2018 10:10 PM            

I don’t know if what you’ve described is Saturn dominant behavior or if I qualify as being Saturn dominant. I have Saturn exalted in my chart. The most exact aspect to my sun and ascendant is a trine from Saturn. I was born on a day ruled by Saturn, and I have a Capricorn moon square Saturn.

Honestly, I don’t have the emotional resources to hold a grudge. It’s miserable and exhausting. I’m probably more sympathetic and forgiving of others than I am with myself. There isn’t much I take personally because I’m pretty decent at seeing through to the root of someone’s actions. Seeing their insecurities. Noticing their values. Understanding the motives.

If there is anything in the world I abhor, it’s emotional manipulation. Being “iced out” will make me wonder if you’re trying to p!ss me off or provoke certain reactions (and these things are usually pretty obvious). I don’t like being emotionally stirred like this. Even if I understand why you’re being that way (immaturity?), it offends me. I hate it! 🤬 I’ll get all righteous and sanctimonious. 😇 Lol! It passes pretty quickly though. 🙃 I just don’t like people who delight in the suffering of others. I won’t retaliate or treat you badly, but if it becomes a pattern, I may feel like I need to distance myself. I’ll distrust your ability and desire to handle our issues appropriately.

Instead, If I felt like you were just offended by something I did and you had no other motives but wanting some distance, I’d give you space then try to work things out.

I’m suspicious of ingratiating behavior, so whatever you do, don’t over do it. The best thing you could do is demonstrate whatever remorse you have in your actions. If she detects a sincere effort, it may help her feel more comfortable around you.

posted July 20, 2018 03:49 PM            

You can try having a private, direct conversation with her about the issue and see if that breaks the ice. This is the only way to deal with passive aggressive and manipulative people. Remain calm and logical. If this doesn't work, don't try again. Leave her be and adjust to the new normal at work. I think it was rotten of her though to subtly turn your other coworkers against you. She could've kept the drama between you and her. She definitely isn't someone I would associate with. Even if she forgives and moves on, she will still stab you in the back in the future because she does not (and has never) view you as a friend, so you are expendable in her eyes.

posted July 20, 2018 04:22 PM            

I'm actually going through something similar that happened a couple weeks ago and I work for a small company which makes it even worse. Long story short...I attempted to put a coworker in her place when I felt like she was taking advantage of the system, which she did NOT appreciate (she is emotionally delicate anyway) and after confronting me in a verbally aggressive way in the middle of the workday, stormed off when I promptly defended myself against her attack and hasn't spoken to me since. After a week of passing each other in the halls, I attempted to reach out via text to "break the ice" (since one of us had to) and further explain my position, but she did not respond. We continue to pass each other daily with no communication and very little eye contact.

If this isn't the definition of "icing me out" I'm not sure what is. I don't feel I should make any further attempts to make amends if she has no interest in engaging me in conversation, and in general I find her to be very immature and quite childish in how she has handled this whole thing when ultimately she was absolutely in the wrong. I have no time for people who play games like this. It's just unfortunate it has to be at work where we are forced to be together daily.

posted July 20, 2018 06:05 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by LaceyLeigh:
Thank you everyone for your responses. Maybe icing her out was the wrong thing to do, but in that moment, it felt like the right thing to do. I have no problem with people cutting me off completely, I wish she would. But, she continues to talk badly about me behind my back, which I don’t appreciate. If she’s mad, that’s fine, completely understandable, but I don’t like how she drags everyone else into it as well.

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May i ask where her moon and Venus are at?

posted July 20, 2018 07:46 PM            

My Saturn aspects:
Sun square Saturn - orb of 2 degrees
Mercury sextile Saturn - orb of 4 degrees
Mars semei-square Saturn - orb of 3 degrees (I feel like this aspect plays out)
Saturn semi-sextile Uranus - orb within 1 degree
Saturn semi-sextile Neptune - orb of 1 degree
Saturn square Pluto - orb of 4 degrees
Saturn semi-square Saturn - orb within 5 minutes
Saturn square Ascendant - orb of 7 degrees

Anyway, for the most part, I prefer to work alone, because if I'm having issues with someone at work, it's more difficult to focus on doing my job. Icing me out is particularly upsetting. When I'm iced out, it's impossible for me to work things out with a co-worker and conditions at work must stay very, very peaceful or I break apart. I'm sensitive and hard on myself. I cannot work around tension, negativity, and drama.

Your co-worker seems to be doing the whole "ruin your reputation" thing. I've seen this as a stereotype of how Capricorns get revenge when they're wronged. Even if she's not a Capricorn, being Saturn dominant may be pointing to her decision to take this approach. Unfortunately, I think this is an immature manifestation of Saturn and Capricorn energy. The mature manifestation would be an intolerance of drama and a preference to actually talk things out to at least keep things professional.