posted March 23, 2019 02:31 AM            

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Originally posted by Rosana95:
My north node is in scorpio in 1st house. What is it I'm striving for in this lifetime? I'm scared of intimacy but want to bond with another very badly. I'm 23 and never been in a relationship and scared I never will be. I'm suffering with social anxiety and depression.

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My Dad has North node in Scorpio(though I am not sure which house) and I think it makes him more of an investigator or prober.

posted March 23, 2019 07:50 AM            

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Originally posted by Rosana95:
My north node is in scorpio in 1st house. What is it I'm striving for in this lifetime? I'm scared of intimacy but want to bond with another very badly. I'm 23 and never been in a relationship and scared I never will be. I'm suffering with social anxiety and depression.

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I have this exact same configuration in my chart. Developing healthy relationships is your focal point in life and destiny! As you get older you won’t have to wait long to meet significant people. With me it all started to get better in my mid to late 20s. Before that I was never able to enter a relationship. Something always held me back.

You don’t really fear intimacy! This isn’t in your nature. Intimacy should be your thing with Scorpio Asc and a Scorpio SN! What you actually fear is completely losing yourself in the process! You need to learn to develop healthy boundaries!! This is your main challenge. Having deep intimate relationships but at the same time staying an independent person.

You need your own value system. Your own sense of self. Your own hobbies and life aspirations. Who you are as your own person always gets challenged as soon as you enter a relationship. Keep that in mind. But in the end you’ll need relationships to fulfill your life purpose of Taurus NN in 7th house.

Less drama, more healthy rituals and routines is another theme.

Good luck. It’s a great placement. You’re destined to meet your soulmates! I say it in the plural form because there’ll be a lot until you finally settle. Enjoy the ride! Stay true to yourself.

Btw: Depression is a construct. It’s an alarm sign that you’re not on your life journey, that you need to change up your daily life! That you need to change tracks, take a different train! You’re so young! You have so much ahead of you to look forward to! I also suffered depression, I know what i’m talking about. Don’t take pills, change your approach to life! Value yourself. Love yourself! <3

posted March 23, 2019 08:19 AM            

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Originally posted by Rosana95:
I'm the same way I investigate everything and everyone. How has your father's life been. Has it been harder than his peers?

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posted March 23, 2019 08:37 AM            

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Originally posted by Rosana95:
I have NN in Scorpio in 1st house not Taurus. I'm Libra Rising BTW

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I’m very sorry for the mixup!!

But I think a lot that i’ve written will fit you still. It’s the same line of development only in the opposite direction. So developing your personality by yourself and in interaction with others remains your major theme.

Taurus’ approach to relationships is different than Scorpios, though. As a Taurus SN in 7th house you tend to be more materialistic and bound to routine. Taurus is anything but superficial but they’re still not willing to go as deep as Scorpio does. They tend to stick around far longer than they should, once they get used to something or someone. It’s hard for them to leave and they usually wait it out past the expiration date. Maybe that’s why you shun entering a relationship.. because you know too well about the responsibility it entails.

As you said, you do fear intimacy, but need to go there anyway.. Try to be less self-protective. Easier said than done, I know .. With Scorpio NN in 1st house you will get the chance to develope your intuition and a reliable gut feeling that will keep you away from people that might take advantage of you.

In this life you need to seek intensity! In yourself and in others. Learning about psychology can open you up to everything that’s hidden within yourself! Know thyself as deeply as possible, should be your motto.
Shine light on your dark side.

Edit:
Things you can do to align with your life path of Scorpio NN in 1st house..

- lose yourself in an activity
- meditate
- study psychology (for real or as a hobby)
- obsess about something or someone
- try to see the hidden meaning
- find out about hidden motivations of yourself and other people.. don’t take things just at face value
- watch movies and read books about .. anything supernatural, frightening, sexual etc (horror movies, detective stories, sex films etc)
- challenge the concept of what’s considered ‘normal’ in our society
- develop your own opinions to different topics, by analyzing an issue from all perspectives
- feel sexy, develop your sexual side
- consider sex outside of a relationship
- start an intense love affair

posted March 23, 2019 09:28 AM            

You just need to constantly discover yourself, and shed one layer after the other until you know yourself completely. This is what ‘dying and being reborn’ actually means. You need to get to the core. You need to accept that you are ‘a being of constant change and development’. Not changing means stagnation and death. Nothing in life stays the same, ever! You need to experience and accept that.