posted July 12, 2019 12:18 PM            

One was kinky and put me in a sex box metaphorically speaking...

The other is too vanilla and can't have sex so its abstinent.

Both have issues with intimacy and allowing themselves to get close! and neither can just get lost in the moment and enjoy something without structuring it in their head and putting up barriers.

Talk about issues! Jesus Christ these folks are complicated and have so many barriers they put up. Seriously smoke some pot.

In the mean time out of all my lovers the only one that can keep in touch NO Problem and remain friends after many years of our romance is an Aquarius.

posted July 12, 2019 12:27 PM            

Kinky Cappy has Mars opposite Pluto

Vanilla Abstinent Cappy has Mars in Cap square Pluto.

posted July 12, 2019 12:35 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
Don’t forget that Cappies look to the future a lot and may or may not want to get involved where they feel it might end up nowhere

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posted July 12, 2019 12:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
As a Cap Moon op. Saturn I will say that I’ve never had good sex (and I’ve been promiscuous..) until I met my husband and then I just released
“Stuff”. I was just sexually comfortable!
I’ve never met a Cap-anything that has had problems with sex so there might be something mental going on with your guys??

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posted July 12, 2019 12:45 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
Well the abstinent guy has sun in the 3rd! with moon/venus/uranus stellium (in his 40s and has never been in a long term relationship) but the kinky guy is great in bed, his issues with intimacy are with opening up emotionally all the way, letting himself get close. Essentially both have issues with intimacy but is manifesting differently.

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posted July 12, 2019 01:33 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
In there 40s?? I’d stay clear of that!! Men should have it together by then. Doubt they’ll change anytime soon!

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posted July 12, 2019 03:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Sorry..is this the same guy I did an analysis on a couple of days back?

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hahaha Yes, the abstinent guy. I mean we are still talking...I hope we can have at least a very close long term friendship.

I have saturn in the 11th so I don't like having many friends and when I get interested in been someone's friend I take it SUPER seriously.

posted July 12, 2019 03:57 PM            

Things got akward with an Aqua who has Uranus on Venus and Mars. He always wanted things on his terms(Sun square Pluto) but denied that.

posted July 12, 2019 05:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Detach , detach, detach. They respond warmer to friendship. Don't demand, dont exact and don't expect.

Things got akward with an Aqua who has Uranus on Venus and Mars. He always wanted things on his terms(Sun square Pluto) but denied that.

We never got passed the 1st kiss. I really liked him but alas, it was not to be. I offered friendship, he got iffy.It ended. I set him lose.

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Thanks for the wonderful advice Aries23, I will try to follow it.

His 8th house ruler is Venus and his 5th house ruler is Uranus which are conjunct exact in scorpio.

If venus rules his 8th and Uranus conjuncts it exact maybe he rebels agains't 8th house values such as sex/intimacy, getting too attached and too close. This along with Mars in Capricorn square Pluto I feel he has his chart working agains't him been able to express his sexual nature.

I think this is giving me the reality check that I need.

posted July 12, 2019 05:41 PM            

I did mention that Venus/Uranus is interrupted affections or an attraction to a "no strings attached" arrangement. Maybe even a long-distance relationship where you two don't see each other often.

I think that intimacy may come swiftly but be gone just as quickly. It is not so much "fear" as this suggests a phobia that one can "overcome". Not so.

With Venus/Uranus in aspect this is a permanent condition which will remain "as is". So you either work with it or get away. It will not change.

He may hug you and get real close to you today. But then tomorrow he will leave you alone to hang out with his friends etc. He will not see the inconsistency in continuation there.

In Sex and the City 2, Kerry Bradshaw gave her butler in Abu Dhabi money to see his wife whom he only sees once a month.

That butler probably has Uranus in aspect to Venus or his wife does. If not either of them, then its there by composite.

Uranus/Venus makes the normal arrangement of the unfolding of love improbable or unlikely. Something always happens to disrupt the conventional pattern.

Either you two meet and then two weeks later, he has to move to another state.Do you write him off? If not , you will have to get used to not being able to see him consistently.

Or you find that he is in the middle of a divorce and still living with the wife etc. This is Uranus/Venus at work. No ways around it. You either stand it or leave it. You can't change it.

Oh yes.And when you are in it, its hard to just leave it. The guy could be absolutely amazing and a very delicious(albeit largely inconvenient) experience.

posted July 12, 2019 06:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
Jesus Christ these folks are complicated ...

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posted July 12, 2019 06:05 PM            

My husband’s Uranus is square my Venus and there’s always something “interrupting” us. Either a phone call, SMS, work, family member having a “crisis”, ex wife not finding keys (btich..) etc etc etc
It’s not really his fault per se, except for not setting boundaries, but universe has it that we get interrupted. All of the times. Now, my own Uranus is starting to get bored so yeah, there you go!

posted July 12, 2019 06:58 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by charlie:
In there 40s?? I’d stay clear of that!! Men should have it together by then. Doubt they’ll change anytime soon!

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It depends on the guy. One of my friends married a man 5 years ago who was 42, never been married and never had a girlfriend. He ended up being the absolutely best boyfriend (and later, husband) that anyone could ask for.

The older someone becomes without having had a solid relationship history, then the more nervous they become when they do find someone they like because they are afraid of being judged. Just as there is not necessarily something wrong with someone who has an extensive relationship history, there is not necessarily something wrong with someone who has a very limited or nonexistent relationship history. I've met very screwed up people who fall into both of these extremes and in the middle.

Hypatia,

The key to making a Capricorn fall for you is to make them feel very comfortable with you. They are very practical, so if they can't see a future with you, then they will immediately dismiss you. The more immature ones will sleep with you while lying to you that they want a relationship when they really don't. These types will not open up emotionally unless they truly like you and see potential in a relationship with you.

posted July 12, 2019 07:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Venus/Uranus ime is always oh so tricky. As sexy as the attraction can be, it can lose its electricity quickly.

I did mention that Venus/Uranus is interrupted affections or an attraction to a "no strings attached" arrangement. Maybe even a long-distance relationship where you two don't see each other often.

I think that intimacy may come swiftly but be gone just as quickly. It is not so much "fear" as this suggests a phobia that one can "overcome". Not so.

With Venus/Uranus in aspect this is a permanent condition which will remain "as is". So you either work with it or get away. It will not change.

He may hug you and get real close to you today. But then tomorrow he will leave you alone to hang out with his friends etc. He will not see the inconsistency in continuation there.

In Sex and the City 2, Kerry Bradshaw gave her butler in Abu Dhabi money to see his wife whom he only sees once a month.

That butler probably has Uranus in aspect to Venus or his wife does. If not either of them, then its there by composite.

Uranus/Venus makes the normal arrangement of the unfolding of love improbable or unlikely. Something always happens to disrupt the conventional pattern.

Either you two meet and then two weeks later, he has to move to another state.Do you write him off? If not , you will have to get used to not being able to see him consistently.

Or you find that he is in the middle of a divorce and still living with the wife etc. This is Uranus/Venus at work. No ways around it. You either stand it or leave it. You can't change it.

Oh yes.And when you are in it, its hard to just leave it. The guy could be absolutely amazing and a very delicious(albeit largely inconvenient) experience.

It requires lots of flexibility and adjustment. Uranus is deeply infuriating. I really don't get the reasoning behind its effects

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hahahahaha Aries23 beautifully put! Thank you, I needed your feedback and insight today to help ground myself, I needed a reality check!!!

Interesting the distinction you made between fear and just pointing out this is Uranus disruptive nature at work when it dances with Venus. I can definitely relate to this in this relationship and other relationships in my life! I am cursed lol....could be that both of my parents have venus in aquarius why I attract this? Or is it that my chart ruler conjuncts exact Uranus?

This made me laugh bc is so true: "Oh yes.And when you are in it, its hard to just leave it. The guy could be absolutely amazing and a very delicious(albeit largely inconvenient) experience."

posted July 12, 2019 07:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astra:

[b]Hypatia,

The key to making a Capricorn fall for you is to make them feel very comfortable with you. They are very practical, so if they can't see a future with you, then they will immediately discount you. The more immature ones will sleep with you while lying to you that they want a relationship when they really don't. These types will not open up emotionally unless they truly like you and see potential in a relationship with you.

[/B]

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posted July 13, 2019 05:21 AM            

My parents both have venus in Aquarius and for a decade had a long distance marriage were my father came monthly to visit and stay with us bc his business was overseas. OMG that is it! this energy is familiar to me..."

YES.Uranus has that exact effect. Your parents didn't mind it at all because of Venus in Aqua. And because you grew up from under that environment by default, you also thought it "normal". So you unconsciously integrated it as part of your security(Venus).

" my relationship with my father was disrupted by us immigrating to the US and him having to stay behind and travel to see us regularly bc of his business. This must have affected me more than I am aware of."

Yes PREACH! Our parents are the first experience that we have of "love" and what that "love" entails. So in your mind, this experience with your Father suggested that love is "long-distance", two people who love each other don't necessarily have to stay together, you travel to see the person you love etc.

So for you as you got older, long distance relationships were "doable".

"There is another memory with my father where our father daughter Saturday ritual got disrupted that really affected me for one Saturday only but it was a big deal how it played out.This has made me very inflexible around disruptions and it caused me my relationship with my ex the one I felt deeply in love with bc I reacted to that disruption from that place of trauma, ofcourse was unaware of this then"

I wonder if this event is shown by solar arc progression or transit? It sounds like it has Pluto accompanying it because Pluto brings "turning points" and trauma attached to it?

Perhaps if not Pluto, one can look at a Uranus/Saturn or a Chiron transit? Saturn/Chiron often speak of pain coming from an authority figure.

Its interesting that your response was like that with your ex because it suggests to me that your love for him ran deep. Up to a point where you may have started to project the past hurt of your father on to him.

The thing about relationships is that they show us more clearly than friendships, tge extent to which we have worked on healing past trauma/hurt.

I don't think it was his intent to hurt you so deeply as to regurgitate the experience with your father(as much as your father didn't mean to intentionally hurt you by disrupting your schedule with him). It's just that it could be that at that point in both experience, there was a lot of momentum in the emotions.

The other thing about Uranus is that(like Mars) it disrupts the emotional momentum. Whilst Mars does it through severance of ties because of anger or things said in the heat of an argument etc.

Uranus on the other hand tends to pull stunts like :

*The person being late for an important appointment or not showing up at all.

*The person pulling a disappearing act to later emerge (months after the fact) with an excuse.

Or in the worst case scenario, the person suddenly passing on in a freak accident or sudden event etc.

Uranus doesn't take feelings into consideration. It messes with the fragile or sturdy of heart alike. And as I said to you, I never understand the reasoning behind its effects. And perhaps there isn't? It certainly doesn't make it nice to go through such disruptions.

When Uranus was on my Moon/Mercury and Mars, it was hell. I could have never managed a relationship at that time..I would have been seen as so "unreliable" by the other party.

And just when I thought it was over, Uranus went retrograde at 24 degrees of Aries (4 degrees away from natal Asc) and I found out my father was NOT my biological father.

posted July 14, 2019 10:31 PM            

So true, bc we go deeper with them emotionally, is less surface.

I love your input on venus/uranus and venus aquarius..

One thing I am realizing that both of these Capricorn guys have in common is that their 7th house ruler both fall in the 3rd house. I feel they are more comfortable with Light relationships, even brief. I met with Cappy 2 today (abstinent cappy) and he use to be an uber driver and one of the things he loved about it is that he would meet a lot of people, talk to them for 15 minutes and never see them again. Both of these cap guys have either venus conjunct uranus or venus in aquarius giving their venus a detached airy quality, then add in both cases their DC ruler falls in airy detached 3rd house, this is probably why I have a hard time going deeper with them emotionally in spite of the scorpio influence in their chart as both have AC conjunct Pluto.

Then factor in my DC is in Gemini so this is why I attract this or feel attracted to this even though my Venus conjunct Mars in Leo in the 8th craves and needs something much deeper/intense and romantic, I guess these two aspects of my chart are at odds with each other making it challenging for me to attract in one person what I need.

Cappy 2 and I talked over the phone and we decided to be friends and then made plans to spend time together today, we did have a nice time, I took him to a crystal store and then we walked around this fair that had art work and then we had ice cream. He is 42 and has never been able to be in a relationship truly or intimate with someone, I am not confident he was able to go all the way even with the three prostitutes. He has made out with different girls but his things are brief and don't last long, even his friendships, he mentioned today his friends are usually not long term even though is obvious he really cares about his friends. Add that it seems he was neglected growing up and I don't think he felt connected with his family at all. Is like he never learned to get attached and doesn't know how to go there. I see him and he seems to be always in his head and looks irritated or neutral but this sweetness shows from time to time that I love. He says he does have an intense side but it translates to feeling anger intensely, its not channeled by feeling love intensely, I guess if he didn't grow up feeling loved its hard for him to channel his intensity by loving intensely so it shows up as anger.

I completely let go of any romantic or sexual expectations with him, I have to or we will not work out not even as friends. I enjoy him, I do, but I have to have a head connection with him for this relationship to last, I cannot have a heart connection with him unfortunately, not to the extent I can or want to. Its sad because he has a very romantic soul, he can enjoy the idea of romance, a part of him longs for it, he can enjoy romantic music but in a playful light way but is like he is able to enjoy the idea of romance or enjoy romance from a distance but not actually let himself experience it.

Its sad bc there is the potential for us to experience something really beautiful and amazing but I feel it will not happen. Our friendship will still be special but the full potential of what we can be, the work of art we are capable of been together will not express itself. I actually got teary, its sad to see a relationship not meet its full potential when you know its full potential is beautiful and breath taking.

posted July 14, 2019 11:57 PM            

But I feel I must add a necessary disclaimer: just when you think that you have the "friendship" thing down, he falls inlove.....awkward!!

Not to say you should build the friendship with that end goal in mind. But I have observed it too many times not to tell you about it.