posted June 21, 2020 05:10 PM            

In my case, it depends on if I managed to get 6-8 hours of uninterrupted sleep the previous night. If so, my response would be F I G H T; all the way, until I either win, or get the opposing party to understand and agree with my perspective. If it’s a day on less than 6 hours of sleep, I think I would be F R E E Z E since I’d likely begin self-introspection and analysis, before implementing an action and/or expression a single thought.

posted June 24, 2020 11:19 PM            

My response to trauma can be pretty severe or extreme, because I've experienced sexual trauma and I would do everything in my power to avoid it happening again. In my nightmares, I've gone as far as murder to avoid another case of it.

While I wouldn't murder anyone in real life, I believe some impulsive, instinctual response would be how I react to hypothetical future exposure to traumatic events or threats to my safety. Either that or I just freeze in place from the horror of it. I also suspect I narrowly escaped a diagnosis of PTSD, but it's hard to really tell without professional input. My love life has been permanently affected by my trauma though.

posted June 24, 2020 11:51 PM            

As for traumatic experiences...I think fast on my feet, and both fight and flight are options. Fear makes me stronger, not trembling in weakness. I usually keep a clear head.

Perhaps a good example (as it includes both flight and then fight) is from when I was a runaway living on the streets. The krew of runaway kids I was with shared a building (squat) with some adult homeless men and we coexisted peacefully enough, even socializing once in awhile. But one day I passed a gang rape of an unconscious (dead?) woman and I instantly took off running with them behind me. I got to the roof (to go below would've meant a slow climb either from a high up window down or gingerly around razorwire, and they'd have caught me) and instantly jumped to the multistory parking lot (about a 5 foot or meter and a half jump), the other way to come and go. Perhaps being 15 helped me do so without hesitation, and it helped since they ran after me but stopped, backed up, and then jumped over.

By then I was in the elevator going down. Once on the first floor I hit several buttons so the elevator would stop multiple times on the way back. Considering the possibility that one or more may have taken an alternative route to cut me off, I chose a direction to run so they couldn't until I found others in my krew.

One girl was on the streets because of extreme sexual abuse, and she's fire, not ice. Her rage was such that I actually thought she was something of a psycho at the time, but we still got along. She had a lot of influence (and many boys weren't going to let a girl be more take charge and ready to fight than them) and when she heard about it she wanted them gone. And even the most tolerant didn't react well that those men had chased me, because if they came after me then they could come after any of them (and we were something of a twisted family).

My friend pretty much took the lead. I watched her back, both of my knives out, and if it came down to it, I would've killed them before allowing them to hurt me or my friends. We were not in a position to call the cops (and didn't trust them), we existed outside the system (and often with a righteous grudge against it), so that's just how it was. But together we could take them on (as opposed when it was just me and I knew I couldn't take them all on by myself). (As it was, they had cleared out by the time we got back. The woman was gone as well, either with them, or perhaps dumped down an elevator shaft, I don't know.)

That's pretty minor compared to other experiences I've had on the streets, and even to a place I'd been locked up in as a child. I do have PTSD and still go to group therapy over it. Fight and flight are both responses, but not freezing or fawning. I'm told I put out a vibe that is tangible to others and makes plenty know I'm not to be trifled with, though I'm not too conscious of it...it's mainly through observation and what others have said that made me realize this is so. It's possible I have some kind of dissociative disorder (*), but I think it's just that a different part of my brain gets activated. (Approaching 10 years ago I went to the defense of a little boy, but did not think to have his older sister take a pic with her phone of the 2 men trying to lead him away, and I believe that's because when this "survival mode" was formed in me, there weren't iphones, so when that part of my brain is activated I'm much slower to think of them, at least if my response is too strong as it was that day.)

(* Though interesting enough, I did experience amnesia once. Long story short, I was locked in an EXTREMELY abusive mental hospital at 13. I think I almost died. I had horrid nightmares once out, though I think part of that was withdrawal from the meds. When I finally told my grandmother about it she finally stopped me and told me I needed to forget about it. And strangely enough, I DID. I don't know how it happened, though there were a few nightmares that reminded me of it but I'd forget by the next morning. I was far behind in math but didn't realize why. And there was no sense of having forgotten something or a "big blank" in my mind, I just did not think about it. Only at divorce court when my parents started to argue over whose idea it was to send me there did the memories come flooding back, and it was this time that I remembered the nightmares as well. Let it be known that it's NOT a good idea to force people to remember what they've repressed. Still, fascinating experience, and thus I can believe people who say they've blacked something out, even for several years.)

posted June 25, 2020 12:46 AM            

Tightest aspect is Mars/Pluto/Uranus

posted June 25, 2020 01:39 AM            

I usually fight, I grew up around lots of fights lol, so I'm comfortable. I rarely freeze, I have never frozen actually, I did run down like Usain Bolt down the stairs when some **** happened. If I don't fight right there, then I fight in an empty room later, otherwise I get stomach aches lol, probably swallowing down anger(ask Cancer Mars), so yeah even for the health I do fight.

posted June 25, 2020 11:11 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
(* Though interesting enough, I did experience amnesia once. Long story short, I was locked in an EXTREMELY abusive mental hospital at 13. I think I almost died. I had horrid nightmares once out, though I think part of that was withdrawal from the meds. When I finally told my grandmother about it she finally stopped me and told me I needed to forget about it. And strangely enough, I DID. I don't know how it happened, though there were a few nightmares that reminded me of it but I'd forget by the next morning. I was far behind in math but didn't realize why. And there was no sense of having forgotten something or a "big blank" in my mind, I just did not think about it. Only at divorce court when my parents started to argue over whose idea it was to send me there did the memories come flooding back, and it was this time that I remembered the nightmares as well. Let it be known that it's NOT a good idea to force people to remember what they've repressed. Still, fascinating experience, and thus I can believe people who say they've blacked something out, even for several years.)

I have conjuct Sag moon & Mars (in a stellium) sextile to my Libra sun and stellium. I don't have my chart on hand so I can't be more precise than that. But interesting enough, starting about the time (1995) I was placed in that abusive mental hospital to then being a runaway on the streets was when Pluto was transiting my Sag stellium moon and planets (my natal Pluto sextile to that)...

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posted June 26, 2020 01:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Leo-Cancer98:
You are an excellent writer. Out of curiosity, what’s your Mercury Sign, its Aspects, and House Placement? Do you have any planets in the 3rd House?

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I do try hard to be understandable, so TY.