posted July 23, 2021 12:39 PM            

My answer is no. You can’t love someone and cheat on them at the same time. Impossible, illogical

posted July 23, 2021 01:06 PM            

Most cheaters I know are Libra Venus/Mars people and people with Mars sq. Neptune.

posted July 24, 2021 02:21 PM            

My ex once told me that he didn't love the other woman. She put interest in him first and since she gave him more attention than me, he bit the bait because of hungry, which I call it as "playing with fire" because she knew he was in a relationship with me and he knew she had some interest with him.

Like someone said before, I also thought he actually didn't love me but somehow I looked more "future wife material" for him and being with me boosted his ego than with her. To find the truth, I tried to talk to the other woman and she said, "he always talk about you to me and he told me that he only takes you seriously and really love you. I know that I and him will never have a future. I'm sorry." When we tried to arrange the meeting next time because I was quite busy when she revealed it for the first time, she suddenly cancelled it in the day we should meet because he told her that she should not reveal anything anymore to me and she didn't want to get involved anymore. I think she got threatened from him because since that she didn't want to pick up my phone and changed her number.

A year after we broke up and prob he thought we all forgot about the police agreement that he should stay away from me, he tried to reach me out again and asked for "building a relationship from zero". I said No.

Since we have mutual friends, they still couldn't get over our relationship and they still informed me how he looked mess up and angry person since I left. He was also still single and they thought he still couldn't move on from me. I heard it for 3 years, so......

The other is a married man (he has Venus in Libra, Mars in Cancer). When we met several times, he confessed that we should meet years before...(...he got married to an Aries sun woman - he has Scorpio sun). He indirectly said that all woman he knew - which I suggest including his wife - demanding to be heard/listened to while he also wanted to be heard and with me he felt like he could talk about anything and I listened without judgements but he never ever opened up to me about his wife or children (he acted like he was single). I didn't ask either because I knew where should I put boundary around taken male, so I put myself as a friend who listened to your problems but wouldn't want to get involved too much. I respect your privacy and I want you to do the same to me unless you ask for solutions. So... I don't know, it looks like he had some deep resentment towards his wife (His Venus conjunct Pluto and he has Scorpio mercury) and I think divorce would destroy his career. He liked send me presents or acted like we were dating, but our friendship never got too far because I knew how to make an excuse to running away in a smooth because I was afraid I hurt him with facts since I knew he was actually a very sensitive person. So..., does he love his wife? I don't know as he never talks about her or his marriage. I only see there's deep resentment he hides.

My husband cheated on me with his ex because I was a detached person while she was an attached person. He felt like he was in the middle since his ex had been cheated on him and she confessed about it, it bothered him a lot, and he felt ambiguous with my detachment. Since he got used in a Plutonic relationship (she is Scorpionic as well as Plutonic, and it makes their synastry Plutonian as they are the same age), he met me who is also Plutonic but a detached person and didn't like Pluto drama in a relationship. When she came back into his life and the more she knew he got another woman, that was the crazy part, she didn't want to let go.

So I think it was more like trust issues he had, indecisiveness and she became obsessed to keep their relationship when she found him attracted to pretty me (they say, not me). At that time, did I trust him immediately? No. I'd try to find the truth. One time his closest friend revealed to me that he actually mesmerized by me and couldn't stop talking about me everytime they met but I was too detached (compared to his ex) and it made him questioning my feelings to him because he felt insecure with my attractiveness (he saw him as ugly). He actually had done with his ex but it was hard to get out from that Pluto attachment. If she didn't cheat on him he probably couldn't really done with it, the friend said.

Although he had been cheated with her, he never ever let me go until we got married because I was pregnant and it was part of his plan to keep me since he knew no other things could keep me stop from running away. F*

posted July 24, 2021 02:36 PM            

Some people separate love from sex.

So for this reason, I have to disagree with you.

posted July 24, 2021 06:29 PM            

My ex husband was caught in a cheating attempt. He is Libra rising, with Uranus on ASC and sextile Sag Mars.

posted July 31, 2021 11:43 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Pale Blue Eyes:
I think cheaters love themselves more than they love anyone else. They put their desires first. They may even love their partners, care about their families etc. but their sexual/emotional needs take priority.

Most cheaters I know are Libra Venus/Mars people and people with Mars sq. Neptune.

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quote:

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Originally posted by GemJams:
Idk about having genuine emotions for their partners,but the serial cheaters I’ve known have been possessive over their significant other.All while happily cheating on them.

I looked up their charts…1 has a Libra Venus and the other 3 have Mars square Neptune. 😯

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posted July 31, 2021 12:36 PM            

There is not really a one size fits all astro signature for any of the above. I think you'll find that if you analyze a crap ton of charts of people who have cheated, especially in a more serial/pathological kind of way, there is not really any specific patterns other than patterns that point to greater selfishness.

And Mars Neptune aspects can vary widely, but Mars Neptune can denote a greater selflessness and sacrificial quality to the sex life. Like having sex with others, not really out of deep self desire, but to be a healing force for them.

I have Mars in Virgo conjunct Virgo Jupiter, closely trine Sun the chart ruler, and widely square Sag Neptune in the 5th. Jupiter rules my 5th and 8th.

My partner of 20 years and I, were completely monogamous for the first 7 years. In that time, I never even seriously contemplated the notion or desire of cheating on her. I just couldn't hurt her like that. The closest I ever came to anything remotely resembling that, was that I had a female friend stay over while she was away one time (with her knowledge/consent), and I was very surprised when I remembered a dream in the morning where my friend and I were kissing. Since both my friend and I were into dreams, metaphysics, etc, I decided to tell my friend about the dream.

I was most assuredly not "hitting on her", but thought we had the kind of personalities and connection where we could talk about anything. Anyways, come to find out later and indirectly, she apparently had interpreted me telling her about the dream as hitting on her, even though I never made any kind of physical move on her ever in the entire time of our friendship/connection. Was I attracted to her in that way? Some, but not enough to risk my relationship and hurting my partner who is my twin soul.

But after my partner and I came to have an open option (we both have Aqua Venus), I ended up getting involved in some sexual situations where I felt like it was more for the other person than for self. For example, I went hiking on a wilderness trail in the winter during a polar vortex. Lows ended up being -5* F. I went prepared. I didn't expect to see anyone else out there, male or female.

When I rolled up to the area, I was very surprised to see someone already there. She was NOT prepared for the coming nighttime conditions. We both looked at each others equipment, and I was not surprised when she asked, can we share space and equipment that night. I said sure thinking to myself, "If we don't, this Lass might get hypothermia and die". Her sleeping bag looked good for maybe about 40/35 at best. I had a thick, down quilt rated for like 0 degrees and I run warm and had warm clothes.

Anyways, we spent a number of hours talking that night, and while I felt some attraction to her, I had recently come to a cross roads in my life where I was rethinking the whole open thing from my end. So I was like, "I'm going to keep this platonic, and just affectionate at most".

During our long talk, she had talked about having been sexually traumatized. She had been married, but while her husband was away and she was at home alone, a man had broke into her house and raped her. The trauma caused a wedge between her and her husband and they separated. She hadn't been with anyone since then.

Later on, as we cuddled together for warmth, she started to grind her hips against me. In my mind, I was like nope, platonic and affectionate, and so in response I rubbed and stroked her head gently and lovingly (since my partner really likes that when we cuddle), and apparently she got upset/frustrated, and snapped, "what am I, a dog?"

Longer story shorter, I gave in (because I felt like she needed intimacy), we had sex that night. As she was on the trail for awhile with no transportation, and it was going to be another crazy cold night again, and we didn't get much sleep because of the cold (like EVERY woman I've ever slept next to, my half of the blanket was constantly stolen from me!), I proposed that we get a hotel (which I paid for), and resumed our odd trail romance for another night. I had to get back home, so I lent her some of my equipment and told her she can just mail it back to me when she didn't need it anymore.

Anyways, that wasn't the only situation like this that has happened to me. Because my Mars is in Virgo, because it is conjunct Jupiter, and because it is widely square Neptune, all in all, often times it feels like I have more of a Mars in Pisces than Virgo Mars, though a bit stronger/more Yang with the close Sun trine, and the Jupiter conjunction (Jupiter being like a blend of Sag and Pisces, but a bit closer to Sag all in all).

posted July 31, 2021 05:46 PM            

To see romantic infidelity, I would look at Gemini or Libra Venus. And also the mutable Venuses (Sagittarius, Virgo and Pisces).

To see totally sexual infidelity, I would look at Mars in Aries or Sagittarius.
Aries for his mania to conquer, and Sagittarius for his sense of debauchery in all aspects.

posted August 05, 2021 04:37 PM            

*There are emotional cheaters.

Those who cheat because the emotional bond between them and the partner is lacking. So they look for it elsewhere.

Usually they cheat with one other person because they are "person sensitive" and are the type to get emotionally attached to the person they cheat with.

They thrive on emotional intensity/ crises bonding. They may have a little bit of a "hero" complex; in that they may want to feel "needed". Or can bond with someone they "helped" or whom they want to "save" because of the emotional intensity of that bond.

They may still "love" the person that they are cheating on. But may not necessarily be "in love " with them. As they measure their love in accordance with the intensity of the bond shared between them and the other. They may be idealists and believe in that "all consuming fiery" type of love eg. Brad Pitt.

Moon/Mars aspects
Ven/Mars aspects
Moon/Plu aspects
Ven/Plu aspects
Mars/Plu aspects

*There are compulsive cheaters.

Those who cheat because they enjoy the chase/ the idea of not being found out. For these folks cheating is a thrill and adrenalin "high". And not necessarily for love.

They may be indiscriminate about whom they cheat with. As there is an inherent F.O.M.O that is always at the basis of their decisions.

They typically dont find fault with their perspective. And are usually quite honest/transparent enough about not being faithful.

They may love you.But may not be faithful to you. Emotions are not necessarily attached to sex. These are gamblers. They are in it for the thrill. Then quickly move on eg. Donald Trump.

Moon/Ura hard aspects
Venus/Ura hard aspects
Mars/Ura hard aspects
Ven/Jup hard aspects
Mars/Jup hard aspects

The secretive cheaters.

These are the cheaters that feel that they can't merge their desires with their chosen partner in a seamless way.

They may compartmentalize their lives i.e put the ring on when entering the house. And then take it off when entering the bar💁🏿‍♂️. And there is NO moral conflict as the two worlds are separated.

Here the native may feel that their fetishes/desires cannot be fulfilled at home.Perhaps they prefer9 that the "housewife/househusband" image must be kept in a pristine, untouched state. And must not be "spoiled" by their more "perverse" desires etc.

They dont have an emotional connection to the person they are cheating with. They will profess to love the person they are cheating on consistently( flowers, tears and all). But this "love" is really because that partner helps them maintain them image of "proprietary".

posted August 06, 2021 02:34 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Librapurr:
Aries23Degrees, the good classification. I think It could be more subcategories in it.
The subject is definitely more complex than the question. How many people lucky enough to find all their needs in one person.
I might thrive on emotional intensity, but it doesn’t mean I would go for it. I still need some security and support.

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Absolutely, this was just my general observation.👌🏿

I also thrive on emotional intensity and very person sensitive. The person has to really hit the right buttons for me to be seduced.And when consistent, I can find myself "entangled".

But this rarely happens on a whim. The last time I cheated on my partner, the guy I cheated with started engaging me emotionally months before.

When i took the plunge. It was because I developed feelings. I still have this spark for him but it didn't last between us because I felt he became an expert at emotional manipulation (Mars in Scorpio).

I was the one inlove. And he was the master seducer. I thought he was sincere. But he wasnt. He just enjoyed getting guys like me to open up emotionally to him and then take.

When he was done, he distanced himself. I was a little confused by the outcome. I dont regret it though as I didnt want my ex(the one I cheated on) back. I didn't feel the emotional charge in our relationship anymore.

posted August 08, 2021 02:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Absolutely, this was just my general observation.👌🏿

I also thrive on emotional intensity and very person sensitive. The person has to really hit the right buttons for me to be seduced.And when consistent, I can find myself "entangled".

But this rarely happens on a whim. The last time I cheated on my partner, the guy I cheated with started engaging me emotionally months before.

When i took the plunge. It was because I developed feelings. I still have this spark for him but it didn't last between us because I felt he became an expert at emotional manipulation (Mars in Scorpio).

I was the one inlove. And he was the master seducer. I thought he was sincere. But he wasnt. He just enjoyed getting guys like me to open up emotionally to him and then take.

When he was done, he distanced himself. I was a little confused by the outcome. I dont regret it though as I didnt want my ex(the one I cheated on) back. I didn't feel the emotional charge in our relationship anymore.

But I learned to be more circumspect of the types that he(the one I cheated with) falls under. Using his looks and psychological depth to get what he wants.Then severing ties wants the mission is "complete". We live and learn🙏🏿

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posted August 09, 2021 03:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Librapurr:
This type of people who can play with emotions gave me PTSD and paranoia. I still partly cannot understand whether they do it unconsciously, and/or it’s part of their charisma , or they really know what they’re doing and just calculating jerks. Even if I don’t go deep in their webs, these experiences making me more closed of this world. Thanks to my Virgo and Scorpio, it’s hard not to have regrets and don’t let it make me colder. Live and learn is a way to look at it. 📿

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Indeed. I think for most it's an unconscious coping mechanism tbh. They may not be aware of the pattern.Perhaps the childhood was filled with emotional manipulation which they then interpreted as "love"?💁🏿‍♂️

The one spoken about THINKS he is smarter than most people. He can spin circles around them. True. He is very good looking. And intelligent too.

I told him that he'll never be able to experience true intimacy that he "simulates" because he is used to the "knock off" that simulated emotions summon. His mind is too calculating to understand/switch off long enough to be IN THE MOMENT.

He sent a message that arrogantly declared that he could "have" me anytime he wanted. Looking at the ability to seduce someone as some sort of "powerplay" or "competitive advantage".

I told him that that might be true.He might be able to get me. As I still really like him(beats me why that is) and have come to understand him.

But as much as he may get to "have" me. He may not be able to keep me.💁🏿‍♂️. And perhaps that's what he fears?

Because to "keep" someone or (in the better sense)to vibrate on their level. Your consistency must be better than your intro. You must have a loaf of bread after leaving a trail of crumbs for another to be enticed with. And i don't think he has much beyond "introduces".

He is like a bright spark rather than a roaring flame. And so by teasing people with small drops to think he has a tank full of water, it distracts them long enough from realizing he is running on empty.💁🏿‍♂️The droplets are all his got. Nothing more. And he fears being "uncovered" as not as "interesting" as he sold himself to be.

When I told him that being "left" is his greatest fear. And so he "leaves" first instead to self preserve. He said I was talking "isht" with all my "psycho babble" and then started to stutter( a sure sign that i hit a delicate mark)

I get him. I really do. I just wish he would let his fears subside and just give our pairing a chance and see where it leads. I have fears too. But I am willing to take a chance.

posted August 12, 2021 02:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:

Because to "keep" someone or (in the better sense)to vibrate on their level. Your consistency must be better than your intro. You must have a loaf of bread after leaving a trail of crumbs for another to be enticed with. And i don't think he has much beyond "introduces".

He is like a bright spark rather than a roaring flame. And so by teasing people with small drops to think he has a tank full of water, it distracts them long enough from realizing he is running on empty.💁🏿‍♂️The droplets are all his got. Nothing more. And he fears being "uncovered" as not as "interesting" as he sold himself to be.

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