posted August 09, 2021 12:43 PM            

A big reason why most of my life I didn't feel it would be in the best interest for me to reproduce/have a traditional nuclear family was because my family life growing up was godawful. I've successfully estranged myself from my dad's family after his death, and I rarely ever talk with my mom's side of the family (their toxic bullsh*t is easier to deal with than my dad's).

Natally, I have Uranus, Neptune, and Saturn all in H4. And my experiences growing up very much embody each of those planet's themes.

My mother has Pluto/Uranus in H4. She grew up in better circumstances than I did, but she was still deeply unhappy with her childhood. She made mine slightly better than hers in some ways (in her view my childhood was "way better" than hers but I disagree).

Natally my dad had Chiron/NN in H4 and he was someone who completely recreated his horrible childhood by doing the same stuff to me, even though he had "good intentions", it still wasn't enough.

Anyway, I hate throwing a pity party and this isn't what this post is about.

I'm curious, if you have a f*cked up H4, were you able to make a happy family created on your own terms? Acknowledging the fact that you may struggle in this regard, yet still sailing past all of the classic pitfalls that come with these aspects and still making something... good, happy, positive, worthwhile out of it?

Or are we destined to keep repeating intergenerational cycles of unhappiness and it's better to just not have kids and leave that sh*t to other people?

I'd love to hear some "I have a f*cked up H4 and I managed to create a beautiful family life" stories if y'all have any.

Or if you can completely relate to my story, feel free to commiserate in here. Judgement free zone.