posted August 12, 2022 04:12 PM            

I still feel such stagnant energy.

I'm chalking it up to all the retrogrades.

Pluto rx squaring my sun one last time.

I'm looking forward to the NN going into the early degrees of Taurus where it's all sextile, trine, and conjunction to my chart.

posted August 14, 2022 02:26 PM            

Still hanging out with my Libra guy who needs to get his life/s*it together.

I am not sure I am supposed to get married again or to have a boyfriend again, I left my ex-husband and part of me wants to find someone to have a conventional relationship with but having a conventional relationship hasn't exactly worked for me, I mean you never know maybe it can work but maybe I need to embrace that my path is supposed to be different in this front.

On one had Saturn opposing my venus and mars right now wants me to slow down, be patient and work on myself and learn to let things unfold naturally without having an agenda or trying to control the outcome, enjoy just being friends and lovers and work on the foundation of the relationship from that angle and saturn will reward this when the time comes type of thing.

Or maybe relationships are not meant for me, I have an empty 7th house and VENUS in LEO rules my MC and 5th house and falls in the 8th, career wise I am blessed, always had clarity on that end and am competent at what I do. Maybe I am supposed to just have romances in his life time, friends and lovers arrangements and just have fun instead of keep trying to fit into this mold society tells me I need to fit into as that is when I run into problems.

I am still not interested in dating multiple people at a time or sleeping around as that is not my style, I have always liked just sleeping with one person at a time, I think that is the 8th in the works. VENUS in LEO in the 8th wants to have one lover at a time. Even with ruler of the 7th falling in my 9th (DC in gemini), I am not meant to only get married once, that placement shows someone with a big heart that will love more than once in her lifetime but when you combine it with venus in leo ruling the 5th and falling in the 8th and juno in Taurus in the 5th I am meant to experience romances in this life that I take seriously, the focus in my chart is not marriage truly.

The only way it makes sense in my brain to get married again is if I have a baby, the only reason why moving in with someone again or getting married again will make any sense to me is if I have a baby with someone which is also a very 5th house reason to get married (Juno in the 5th), if not the husband ends up being the child for me. Outside of this context It would not be beneficial for me to move in with someone again or get married. The only way I won't feel trapped in a marriage is if we have a baby together we both love and enjoy raising together, is if we have something powerful like that bringing us together. Otherwise I know I will start to feel trapped and suffocated sooner than later.