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Author
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Topic: Do humans inflict our own emotional pain?
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Lioness
Knowflake Posts: 2993
From:
Registered: Mar 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 12:59 AM
  
Im wondering if this is just me, or am I reading to much into things.... Sometimes when I read peoples post (nothing specific) I feel like why is this person letting things bother them so much.. Are they to sensitive or am I not sensitive enough?? I just cant comprehend the "why" people are so upset and bothered by things that seem, like they shouldn't... Is this me?? Dont get me wrong, I do know we all have our bad days (even meee..lol) and we get upset, and have disappointments...
What Im speaking about is some things just (to me) seem like that person shouldnt be as upset.. So Im thinking Is this me being unemotional?
I have empathy, I can feel the pain, but it seems like sometimes we (as people) make our pain worse. When things go wrong for me.. I do feel the need to vent (maybe what Ive read is venting) not sure) but I can feel the pain...
I vent then Im done with it, I move on.. I re-think everything, and I play it all out in my head on "what went wrong" then when I figured it out... Im like ok cool NOW I know... I move on, I dont accept the hurt or pain.. I accept the lesson, and learn... I will not let emotional pain control me..
I dont think of myself as blocking it... more so that I accept the bad, as o well, and I learn from it.. (sometimes.lol) On some post I read, I feel like some people are stuck in emotional pain, and they cant let it go... There has to be acceptance for it is what it is! It just is! and learn and chalk it off as lesson learned... Am I cold for thinking this way??
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Voix_de_la_Mer
Knowflake Posts: 69
From: Scotland
Registered: Aug 2011
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posted August 19, 2011 04:50 AM
"I feel like some people are stuck in emotional pain, and they cant let it go... There has to be acceptance for it is what it is! It just is! and learn and chalk it off as lesson learned... "IMHO, therein lies your answer. The lesson must be learned, and how the lesson is learned is different for everyone. Some people may be more adept at seeing the lesson in the pain, like you may be, others have their own patterns that they must go through to reach resolution. But, many people equate pleasure with pain, this deep-seated habit can often go completely unnoticed, and can rule a person's emotional life, as a result they will attract, and be attracted to, situations that jusitfy this belief, and unfortunately keep them locked in the cycle. IP: Logged |
Betty Boop
Knowflake Posts: 1562
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 04:54 AM
Hi Lioness  quote:
I just cant comprehend the "why" people are so upset and bothered by things that seem, like they shouldn't...
I feel the same way! I really don't care whether it's cold or not. quote:
I vent then Im done with it, I move on.. I re-think everything, and I play it all out in my head on "what went wrong" then when I figured it out... Im like ok cool NOW I know... I move on, I dont accept the hurt or pain.. I accept the lesson, and learn...
That's exactly me - 100% IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 18542
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 11:40 AM
If we ARE doing it it is because we are stuck.A person won't get unstuck from condemnation.It will never work.It will make them feel more hopeless.
They must be accepted exactly as they are and given love ime ------------------
Do You Think This Psychic is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Lioness
Knowflake Posts: 2993
From:
Registered: Mar 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 08:24 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
If we ARE doing it it is because we are stuck.A person won't get unstuck from condemnation.It will never work.It will make them feel more hopeless.
They must be accepted exactly as they are and given love ime
I guess thats what I dont understand, is how people get stuck in an emotional pain... Why not accept what is, and move on.. why dwell??
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Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 18542
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 08:29 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lioness:
I guess thats what I dont understand, is how people get stuck in an emotional pain... Why not accept what is, and move on.. why dwell??
Maybe it is Water ,Lionnes. I have had this discussion with Fire females.
Dwelling may be how Water processes things is all I can say.
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NickiG
Moderator Posts: 4113
From: Pluto, next to Ami Ann
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 10:12 PM
i often think this too, lioness....i just simply dont understand how some people can get so bothered and upset over something so stupid...but then i look at the stuff i got upset over in the past and i'm like "did i really????"i try to keep in mind that everyone is different, even their programming, and i try to see things from their point of view, but sometimes i simply dont see it ------------------
I once saw a sign that said "sin is death" but if "all deaths are suicide (linda goodman)" and suicide is sin, then shouldnt "death is sin" be more appropriate? when organic is used to describe food then you know we have come to a dark age in history IP: Logged |
Lioness
Knowflake Posts: 2993
From:
Registered: Mar 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 10:39 PM
Well Im actually wondering if something is wrong with me... LOL.. (ok soooo its leo of me) Not that I want emotional pain.. Im thinking am I a cold person, where I dont "get" the emotions people go through.. Maybe like Ami said its my fire...
But My Pisces asc feels the pain from people, and I get where I cant stand it, it bothers me so much that, I have no choice but to disconnect my self from people.. I just feel so deep inside, that people over use there emotions, and dwell on it for so long, that they have no escape.. I cant be around this.. My stomach starts to hurt. I feel like I have to throw up... IDK... Its like if its self inflicted pain... IP: Logged |
mochai
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Charon
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 19, 2011 11:21 PM
Problems are seldom one dimensional. They're an amalgamation and entanglement of every experience that has come before. It can be easy to get stuck in a mindset or become too afraid to approach the core center of the issue so they get stuck on the peripheral problems that aren't necessarily related to the core issue. The peripheral is safer and it's trumped up because the core issues are just too painful, but they still want the love, attention, and support for the entirety even though they can't express it short of the emotional wounds and symptoms that show on the surface. Sometimes the right support is all that's needed to get at those deeper issues and this instinctual ploy is in a sense seeking an opportunity for healing. If we support the paradigm of past life traumas, they may not even know what the trauma influencing them is. It's hard to say that's that for 100% of the cases, but I tend to believe that plays some role.I agree with Ami on this one as far as the acceptance and love is concerned. People are very good at dissociation and repressions.. In the psychotherapeutic process, people frequently have to relive the trauma to some minor degree, whether via approaching it and being with it or reappraising in order to move past and heal it. Sometimes I laugh at myself because I keep putting myself in these painful situations or convince myself I have to play some backwards role because I bought some emotionally or psychologically abusive lie about who I am, and it can be really irksome. IP: Logged |
Betty Boop
Knowflake Posts: 1562
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 20, 2011 12:30 AM
Yes. You can accept them as they are.. or.. if you are not so inclined, you can avoid them. IP: Logged |
Betty Boop
Knowflake Posts: 1562
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 20, 2011 12:41 AM
Personally - I’ll lovingly accept them as they are – for a day.. for two days.. for a week.. for a month… for a few months – but when we start to get close to the yearly threshold – I lose my patience. Each to their own.. If you lose your patience sooner – you are more than entitled to detach – and surround yourself with those people who have things in common with you and who do not depress you with their negativity.
There is nothing wrong or “cold” in doing this ^ IP: Logged |
mochai
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Charon
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 20, 2011 01:07 AM
True. That's why I said the right support. It's very hard to walk the right line between pouring energy down the drain and healing.I like what Chogyam Trungpa said. There's compassion, and then there's idiot compassion. Idiot compassion is enabling. Compassion is not. IP: Logged |
Lioness
Knowflake Posts: 2993
From:
Registered: Mar 2010
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posted August 20, 2011 02:23 AM
Thanks guys... I guess sometimes I feel guilty having to get away... or escape... Im working on connecting with my own emotions... I do find others draining at times, but yet I want to help and be there at the same time.. Its a mix of I want to help/ OO Im so outta here... I seem to be the poster child for help.. I like it, but I cant always handle it... People's emotions some times make my head spin... lol
Weirdo though one of my friends moved and she had a neighbor, an older lady, she came over and introduced herself.. She was a very nice lady.. Funny as h e l l ... lol
She had a hip replacement.. For me this was the first time I felt someone else's physical pain.. IDK what this is.. or why... But every time she would move, my leg got warm and had a tingle in it and my stomach would get jumpy.. It was so bad I had to leave... I felt her pain in my gut..... This is a woman with a lot of issues... IDK I feel her, physical and mental pain... its unbearable...
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Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 18542
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted August 20, 2011 08:18 AM
I am gonna think about this and try to respond from my own unique perspective.We are all so different and we all need each others energies.
I am highly air and highly water.The Air seems like a joy. I have no earth which would be the Void I would choose if I had to chose one.
I have high water--Cancer and Scorpio. I am an example of someone who was stuck in a terrible morass but is getting out so I think I have things to offer.
I do find that Fire friends help me to see the other side of myself.
It is like seeing a way of being that I do not have naturally.
------------------
Do You Think This Psychic is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Lindaland
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