posted February 05, 2012 05:51 AM            

Q “The youngest son, the twenty two year old, how old is he?”

Q “Were you present when your picture was taken?”

Q “Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?”

Q “How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?”

Q “How many times have you committed suicide?”

Q “You were there until the time you left. Is that true?”

Q “So the date of conception of the baby was August 8th?
A “Yes”
Q “And what were you doing at the time?”

Q “Mr Slattery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon didn’t you?”
A “I went to Europe Sir”
Q “And you took your new wife?”

Q “How was your first marriage terminated?”
A “By death”
Q “And by whose death was it terminated?”

Q “Can you describe the individual?”
A “He was about medium height and had a beard”
Q “Was this male or female?”

Q “Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your Attorney?”
A “No, this is how I dress when I go to work”

Q “All your responses must be oral. OK What school did you go to?”
A “Oral”

Q “Are you qualified to give a urine sample?”
A “I have been since early childhood”

Q “You say the stairs went down to the basement?”
A “Yes”
Q “and these stairs, did they go up also?”

Q “Do you recall the time you examined the body?”
A “The autopsy started at around 8.30pm”
Q “And Mr Dennington was dead at the time?”
A “No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.”

Q “Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?”
A “No”
Q “Did you check for breathing?
A “No”
Q “So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?”
A “No”
Q “How can you be so sure Doctor?”
A “Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar”
Q “Could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?”
A “It is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere”