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Author
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Topic: ok, another stupid question: what exactly is shadow work?
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andstuff
Knowflake Posts: 3163
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted August 20, 2013 07:52 AM
  
... and why am I supposed to do it? If there are qualities I'd rather stifle in myself and not expose to anyone, how can they possibly be beneficial?It would be disgraceful to resign and admit to having them, right? Because I am watching others and I prefer those who do not possess those qualities, so surely having them makes one less cool/desirable/whatever? Why would I make a conscious choice to be worse than others? I have an image of the kind of person I want to be and why do I have to do shadow work to integrate things I don't wish to have? If someone knows about these things, I'd be grateful for clarification.... IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 8407
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted August 20, 2013 08:29 AM
Very short and sweet, shadow work is about learning to control the parts of you that exist within you that you'd rather pretend don't exist (and thus project into others, or become an alcoholic so you can "release" yourself, etc) so that they can't control you. IOW, it's about becoming lucid enough to exercise greater control over the repressed parts of yourself rather so that it can't take you over or otherwise affect your actions one way or another without your being fully aware of it.For example, some people feel all filthy for having erotic feelings, and unable to handle this in themselves they then project it into others and thus become very abusive to their sexual partners because their partners "made" them filthy (that is what they hate in themselves they then hate in the other person and blame the other for their own erotic nature), the partner is filthy and must be punished (in extreme cases this can lead to a serial killer preying on prostitutes). A guy who can't accept he's gay can become violent to any guy who seems too effeminate. A woman who's helpless to her erotic desires because she won't admit to them may seek alcohol to release that side of herself and blame the alcohol (over and over and over again). Such a person who then accepts their erotic part of their nature through shadow work can make peace with it rather than living in a silent hell that also inflicts their inner hell on others (this wouldn't mean becoming a sex crazed beast in this case but in consciously acknowledging and working to control it rather than being subconsciously controlled by it). In some cases this can mean giving one's self permission to release positive qualities. For example, many men don't allow themselves to feel anything besides laughter or anger as it feels "weak and effeminate" and many women won't assert themselves as they don't want to "be a ***** or priss" and this can allow them to stop tormenting themselves needlessly as they give themselves permission to exercise that part of themselves that they'd been raised not to express (and suffer as a result). IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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