posted January 22, 2021 08:13 PM            

Damn pandemic is making it hard. I keep coming here without even realizing what I'm doing.

posted January 23, 2021 04:49 AM            

But, yeah, do feel kind of similar. More so (speaking to myself), "shouldn't you be focusing on this book you started, rather than writing posts here?" Not because of a lack in others, but because I really should just get this done.

But partly because of the way things are, and there is not much socialization going on in my life, and as I'm off FB etc, I keep getting drawn back in. Have a couple regular email pen pals, and while I enjoy the communication there, I've always been rather group focused. Gemini on my 11th, with Mercury conjunct the ASC/chart ruler--the Sun, closely trine Jupiter ruler of the 5th and trine Mars the ruler of the 9th. And Angular Venus in Aquarius, with Angular Pisces South Node closely cusping Aquarius, and fairly strong Uranus (angular, in major aspect to ASC/chart ruler, ruler of the Sun and Mercury Signs, ruler of the MC, Moon, and 3rd House, etc).

posted January 23, 2021 06:37 AM            

I think it is good for all of us to strike a balance between being on the internet and not.

posted January 23, 2021 05:04 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:
of the Lindaland Asylum.

Damn pandemic is making it hard. I keep coming here without even realizing what I'm doing.

"I play this game. It's pointless, and annoys me. And yet I'm compelled to play on." --Illyria.

---

^ {added bold and italics for emphasis}

Yep!!! Fellow-Inmate & LL Addict
Sun conjuncts Saturn in Aqua right now.

(music) Obsession (Animotion)
[4:01] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIs5StN8J-0
( your Buffy quote.... !)

posted January 24, 2021 12:50 AM            

Another member who I trade emails with on a regular basis asked why I hadn't posted anything in a long while, and I said I left. He convinced me to come back, mainly for him, but he seems inactive himself so I'm at a loss on why he wanted me back here. Though I didn't fully leave as I had before, I did start coming back less and less.

x

And then the pandemic hit. Whatever you want to believe about it, it has impacted my livelihood and way of life. Suffice to say, new sources of stress came at every angle, while the ways I destressed and rejuvenated myself have been cut off. I don't see a point in saying more than that.

One very bad side effect is that because of the way society is now under the pandemic there are a lot of times I must remain close to my landline phone and/or computer for my livelihood. This puts me on the computer more, and out of sheer boredom and/or when I get mentally exhausted from all the other things I do on it, I tend to click around, visiting boards I haven't even thought of in years. And it's way too easy to get on LL, all I have to do is mistype a key and I'll find myself here rather than where I intended to go. And then I figure "while I'm here..."

It's a mistake. There's no point in listing the multiple reasons why.

It also doesn't help that I try to pass the time at times by rereading the books I have (and got some of the bigger books ready for a reread) as many were stolen when I went to my grandmother's funeral, and seeing the lack of books reminds me of the funeral and other losses, the vultures that attempted to prey on me (thankfully, only the teen thief succeeded while I was in another state and it appears he worked fast and thus alone, it could've been much worse), and how I lost access to the library which has yet to reopen (among other places I also lost access to).

Ah, the library...where I could get ETHICAL journalism (online journalism is poison, at it's best, it's mere entertainment), among many other things (and was about to volunteer at a program there next which would also help me feel better). The lack of books and other library materials again leaves me online more.

But I will say that one day, assuming the library ever reopens I'll (one day) review the books that made me think there was something to astrology to see how it looks to me now, but even if it draws me back in I think it's a topic I should explore alone.

I think my starting this thread helped. I actually had to push myself to come here today, and it took me more than once before I could bring myself to make this post which I felt was owed. Hopefully I have the strength now to stay away.

posted January 24, 2021 01:16 AM            

I miss the library so much, and the bookstores. I was in a bookstore earlier on, just before they closed, for the second time since March of last year.

posted January 24, 2021 01:41 AM            

I ask because "to check out" is as easy as doing something else.

I'm not on LL as much these days because I have a lover in my periphery. The thought passed in the last days that I haven't felt an urge to visit as much because he's around, although I've wanted to, the comfort and exploration.

I have affection for each of the members on here, especially in a spiritual sense; none of which I feel attached-to but that's simply my own nature, not sure how else to describe an underlying trait of autonomy; though, whenever I notice one familiar hasn't been as active on the board, I like to wonder where life took them.

My closest friends (I have two) hear about some of you (as characters) if we've interacted that day and I'm particularly invested in the moment's dialogue.

I find it cute that I spend so much time on LL. It's the first site I check in the morning, but the timezone difference makes for an empty 'active topics' page. I sortof wait all day for you all to wake up.

-----

posted January 24, 2021 02:02 AM            

I used to process things in a journal, and didn’t talk nearly so much. I used to hardly ever argue, and now it’s too easy for me to do. I took an enneagram test a little while ago, even though I’ve lost interest in things like that. One choice was something like “my thoughts and feelings aren’t that important (to share), and that’s okay”. I used to think that way, and sometimes still do, but I’m more opinionated now, and I don’t want that to be a bad thing. I miss feeling, and being more peaceful, but certain changes needed to happen.

I want to know how people go cold turkey, or just cut people off. I find it almost impossible, except in rare cases.

posted January 24, 2021 10:53 AM            

You ARE an excellent researcher, and a writer. The way you've put thoughts together has been impressive. You know that I have always tremendously valued the balance and input you have added to the forums here.

(Vansio..)
(Affection is returned. Glad you found someone.)

Teasel, I have known your frustrations. You do a SUPERB job over in the political forum. You have lots of patience and resilience.

Pixie.. I remember times when you needed time-off to yourself for a while; then you returned. While you've been missing, I've imagined you (and your partner) galivanting around the United States, exploring the land. Having adventures. I've been aware when you're presence goes missing.. As long as I've seen that you have not unregistered, then my Heart expects that you WILL be SEEN once-again.
It's a TREAT to see you at LL, posting. You are one of her extra special ingredients.

Pixie-- RE your business.
Hope your business comes back full.
The pandemic has quashed so many.
You might look into some of the govt monies available for Business Owners. I think they do have ways of trying to compensate Loss of Income. Apply for Assistance in the State where you live right now. There ARE relief-monies available. It could be 'hidden' .. so read about it, and I hope you get a hunch WHERE to find it.
Rm did find help for himself (in this State).

Hang in there.

posted January 25, 2021 06:51 PM            

Once the vacine rollout is complete everything will return to almost back to normal.

Just stay strong for a couple more months until the vacince rollout is complete.

Always remember that if your feeling down due to COVID..its just a couple more months!! until everyone is either vacinated or given the change to get vacinated and it will be all over!!.

posted January 27, 2021 02:55 PM            

Today feels like a day I'd like to step off this wheel.

posted January 28, 2021 02:19 PM            

You always brought something interesting to the table no matter what the topic, and your depth of knowledge when it comes to Mythology, Religion, Dungeons and Dragons, Lovecraft and countless other meta concepts including Politics and Sociology... that reading your posts often felt like I was getting a free courtesy College Level Lecture! Your wisdom will be surely missed, and LL is going to be far worse off without the quality you brought to every conversation, not to mention the Life Experiences you shared so candidly that were often incredibly insightful... even heartbreaking reads.

I feel whether you knew it or not, you have a profound impact of those who take the time to read your posts and writings, not just the people who have said so here... as I believe your positive influence spreads much further and in subtle ways that will shape many peoples ideas about Life and our place in his Crazy Universe we call home.

I often Auto-Pilot to LL and other such places, or worse still... certain video games that rope me in for extended periods... where I'm left slapping my head afterwards thinking, 'what the hell am I doing with my time right now'... the Pandemic definitely doesn't help... and I'm sure it's even more difficult to deal with if you had so many other outdoor activities you liked to do which are now off limits... The Walls of Arkham Asylum have been closing in on all of us to some degree or another in the past year and a time-out or making the call to leave indefinitely is surely a tough one, though you need to do what feels right for you.

I'm especially going to miss all the Comics you post in the Need a Laugh Threads and so here is one you might appreciate given your current opinion of the Internet or maybe Elements of LL at the moment.

posted January 28, 2021 03:45 PM            

Hard to say goodbye..
Wishing PJ the Best in Life.
She's an Influencer.
Brilliant person.
Ultra-COMPASSIONATE Soul.

Has Potential of winding up in an awesome Leadership position somewhere, someday--
to Be a Power and Voice for Doing Good in Society.

posted January 30, 2021 11:24 AM            

And maybe if we are lucky, we can be in her Scooby-Gang hehe!?