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Author Topic:   Breaking The Abuse Cycle
PlutoSquared
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Posts: 4328
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted May 10, 2011 09:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PlutoSquared     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
For those of us who have suffered with abuse, it's important to not repeat the same mistakes in future relationships - to make sure that our next partners are decent people who we can trust - people who will value us...

A relationship that is capable of a greater level of honesty and safety...

Anyone have any advice on how to break the nasty abuse cycle? How can someone learn to seek after better relationships; to seek their own personal fulfillment?

Any success stories or personal methods are welcome

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PlutoSquared
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Posts: 4328
From: Mars
Registered: Aug 2010

posted May 10, 2011 09:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PlutoSquared     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
How to Prevent Abusive Relationships

Instructions

1. Recognize that you are vulnerable to abusive relationships. Make an effort to become a more emotionally healthy person,. If not, you are very likely to find yourself in another abusive relationship. While you likely do not enjoy being in abusive relationships, they hold a level of comfort because they are familiar. You need to break this pattern to prevent abusive relationships. Keeping a journal throughout your journey is a great way to figure out what triggers you to let these people in your life.

2. Choose not to enter into a new relationship until you heal your emotional wounds. Many people find themselves bouncing from one abusive relationship to another. This can be prevented by taking a sabbatical from relationships.

3. Find a qualified therapist with experience in counseling people with your particular issues. A good therapist can help you understand why you are attracted to abusive people, and also he can show you the way out of this cycle. Anyone who has been in an abusive relationship can benefit from therapy.

4. Learn to love yourself. The more you love yourself, the less likely you will be to find yourself in an abusive relationship. If you love yourself, you seek out relationships that nurture you rather than continue an unhealthy dynamic.

5. Set emotional boundaries in relationships. Most abusive people seek out partners who they can push around, whether physically or emotionally. If you set emotional boundaries in your relationships, abusive people will no longer be attracted to you. Abusive people are typically looking for “doormats.” It is imperative to stop being a doormat.

6. Walk out at the first sign of abuse. Many battered women leave their abusers multiple times before they leave for good. The first time the other person is abusive to you, leave the relationship. It is much easier to get out in the early months or years than it is later.

Read more: How to Prevent Abusive Relationships | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_2299226_prevent-abusive-relationships.html#ixzz1M0IAri2e

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saronna
Knowflake

Posts: 241
From: Australia
Registered: Jan 2010

posted May 10, 2011 10:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for saronna     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I left an abusive,dysfunctional relationship and it was because of Al-anon and 'Lovesick' The Marilyn syndrome why women become addicted to the wrong men. At the time when we were together I didn't know that there was something wrong with his head. The bottom line is I left because of Al-anon and working on my own self-esteem I was able to finally leave for good. Now, however, after doing alot of work on myself, self-worth etc I am dealing with abusive family and breaking abusive patterns for good. I am planning to leave the family immediate extended tree for good. The family is sick and it's one step I haven't taken completely from lovesick addiction the marilyn syndrome, that is breaking away from family contact and having no contact whatsoever. It's not only immediate family but imediate extended family who are also sick and maya.

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LEXX
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Posts: 6071
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009

posted May 11, 2011 10:01 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LEXX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
PlutoSquared

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~The present time is theirs, but the future is mine.~Nikola Tesla
~There is no box.~H♥
~Balance is not letting anyone love you less than you love yourself.~Felipe
~I remember, therefore I am immortal~LEXX
~It is far better to regret wrong paths taken than to regret the paths not tried~Giselle
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