posted July 30, 2012 12:17 AM            

What would you do if your partner forced parenthood on you?

posted July 30, 2012 02:01 AM            

I don't react very good when someone tries to force my hand especially in this regard and I wouldn't do it to another either because I know just how it feels. I DO NOT CARE about motives, there are no motives good enough for me. It is pure selfishness and sheer manipulation.

Forcing parenthood on a person is wrong on so many levels and disgusts me so much. It has been done by women, successfully, since forever and seems to be working just fine, still. Has given rise to a lack of trust in the rest of us and to an increasing rate of divorces and of young people needing therapy. It has nothing but tragic and regretful consequences. In my opinion, whoever does this is nothing but a selfish, immature and narrow-minded individual. And as I said, I don't care about their motives or excuses. There is contraception. There is the after pill. There's also abstinence for crying out loud. THERE ARE NO EXCUSES. NONE. Period. These people get no sympathy out of me, nothing but contempt. And yeah, I may be judgmental, because like I said, there are no excuses.

It saddens me to no end that in an era of spiritual and emotional enlightment, women still resort to these sort of sorry practices.. forcing attachment and commitment from a man by using an innocent child as a hook. It is regrettable for everyone concerned, but while both the adults have some say in it (the man too, because he puts up with it.. If men wouldn't, perhaps it would discourage other women from repeating this pattern), the child doesn't and will grow up with an emotional trauma sometimes I think nothing may heal

I think both the people concerned should put the child's interest above everything else.

posted July 30, 2012 05:30 AM            

You really can't trust anybody.

Forced parenthood absolutely disgusts me.

On top of that, it might not even keep a man, either. He could still leave and you could just be his 'baby momma'. Yeah, he'll have to pay child support, but even "oopsing" him can't force him to stay. The whole thing could backfire.

posted July 30, 2012 06:34 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:
If I were a man and this was done to me I'd break up with her the moment I realized it was blatant manipulation (as opposed to some accident) and then sue for sole custody of the child as the mother is morally unfit and I would cut her out of my (and our child's) life as much as possible to the point of gaining a restraining order against her if necessary.

---

Men can be incredibly gullible sometimes. It is why this trick is still working. My ex and I were talking about getting married, he even said he bought me a ring. Then he announces me that his ex turned up 6 months pregnant and baby could be his. In a blink of an eye all our plans went down the drain and he decides he wants to move in with her, take care of her and be a father to her baby. I would never dream coming between a parent and his child, but that was just ridiculous. In the end it was for my better because he wasn't good for me and found out he lied to me abt smth else.. but I will never forget what I felt and what I went through in the weeks while I waited for the paternity test results. Led to my major depression and suicide attempt episode.. Ohhhhhhhhhhh if I had just 2 minutes in a room with that despicable woman!!!!!!!!!!!!! B!tch didn't even want to talk to me, said her baby deserves a family and she will fight to get my ex. Forgot to say that in the end there was no baby. She claimed she miscarried, my ex came after me this January but too little, too late.

posted July 30, 2012 12:44 PM            

The one who claims it was because she wanted to be loved tricked her boyfriend and lied to everyone else. She claimed that they had been trying all along. Too bad he didn't know. He looks miserable as hell, especially since he's realized just how unstable she is.

posted July 30, 2012 05:40 PM            

One said she wanted a baby to unconditionally love her which really made me laugh. We'll see how unconditionally she loves after she's woken up at 2 AM by a shrieking infant once again to feed and/or change diapers...and if she wants that unconditional love then she better be able and willing to show the same, and even then there's no guarantee.

posted July 30, 2012 07:40 PM            

Hmm... I think you can say that both ways of thinking are barbaric. Rhett's actions appealed to women and reflected men stuck in an age that is long gone and was never really true. *I've never seen the movie or read the book, but have been told that Scarlet goes off of the deep end after Rhett "takes" her.* It's a scary way to take ownership of another person like this. Maybe the effects of a woman forcing fatherhood on a man who has not come to his own decision of whether or not he's ready for it are similar to lets say traditional rape. There's this feeling of "how could you do this to me?"

The flaw in both is that the person who's made the decision for both parties thinks that they're doing the right thing and what they're doing is what needs to be done to push the other in their direction. The barbaric man in history and literature has only done what society expected of him; men were supposed to be very masculine, have a very animalistic side to them that would cause fear in women enough to respect them and buy into the old belief that "boys will be boys." What Claire (from the article) has done is no different, except this is more new age, but not really. She, and women like her, have bought into the fairy tale theory that all men want children/are meant to be fathers whether they know it or not. Who's to say that he wouldn't have come around, but she probably isn't the one who he would have chosen to start a family with? I know this seems insensitive towards older women who find themselves wanting children later in life, but it's not my intention. It's just in this case, specifically, that her age made her so desperate.