posted January 01, 2013 03:29 AM            

I chat with lots of people, men and women, and for myself I'm simply not able to not try and be "perfect"

What is meant by this is always subverting one's own thoughts, feelings, desire, to make the person one is talking with feel better/more confident/more brilliant?

Suppose it is charm, or just being very polite, my goodness though

posted January 01, 2013 09:22 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Padre35:

Ugh, anyone feel the need or just always try, to be "too perfect"?

I chat with lots of people, men and women, and for myself I'm simply not able to not try and be "perfect"

What is meant by this is always subverting one's own thoughts, feelings, desire, to make the person one is talking with feel better/more confident/more brilliant?

Suppose it is charm, or just being very polite, my goodness though

---

Totally. Admitting it is a big thing! I am proud of you

------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted January 01, 2013 03:45 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sand:
idk but u should be a natural at the charm with ur sag sun (if i remember right) and leo moon..

---

Oh sure, and was raised with manners so to speak, but what happens is if I make on misstep or weird hear about even 6 months later.

It's as if people save that stuff up then beat me over the head with it forever and it is rather annoying.

BUT, if one acts annoyed that is when it really is poured on as in "oh a chink in the armor!"

I'm the sort who does not remind others of their foibles, however people are more than happy to remind me of mine.

But if I "flip" it scares the utter **** out of people, even if I raise my voice it just startles people, when I get angry people tend to GTFO like children whose parents are mad at them.

posted January 01, 2013 03:51 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Padre35:

Ugh, anyone feel the need or just always try, to be "too perfect"?

I chat with lots of people, men and women, and for myself I'm simply not able to not try and be "perfect"

What is meant by this is always subverting one's own thoughts, feelings, desire, to make the person one is talking with feel better/more confident/more brilliant?

Suppose it is charm, or just being very polite, my goodness though

---

I struggle with this too and I'm also a Sag.

My internal environment will not settle for anything other than perfection (which I also know is impossible, but have great difficulty actually realizing). I attribute this to several factors.

Moon in Virgo 6th square Sag Sun 8th - Finding comfort in constantly refining my self
NN/Pluto in Libra 6th conjunct DSC (opposed ASC)- Obsessively driven to relate perfectly with my environment. Constantly focused on transforming how I project myself.
Saturn in Virgo 5th square Venus in Scorpio 8th - I find creative joy in uncovering personal flaws and "fixing" (aka disciplining) myself. That desire can override my ability to appreciate myself as beautiful just the way I am.

posted January 01, 2013 09:33 PM            

Crabbypatty, this is sort of how I was raised, one was always polite and interested in the other person only interjecting a personal note when it adds something to their point.

I've gone through this before and the problem was not that I was unable to act differently, it was more that, once again, full throttle.

It's as if the charm part people love, but people being mistrustful, want to see the other side as well.

So they act ugly, in a provocative manner to see what I'll do, "gentleman" or "nice guy".

Problem for me is my dark/angry side is very very dark and cutting all of the insight focused in a powerful way on someone else's obvious (to me) flaws and I've literally made others cry with just 3 sentences.

Then again, there is also this odd thing women do when they like you, they tease the heck out of you, not realizing how personal that can be taken b/c they've never seen it before from you.

posted January 01, 2013 09:41 PM            

HI CRABBY.

------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted January 01, 2013 09:52 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Padre
You would need just the right synastry. You would need a moon trine moon, as they could understand you. With the right synastry, things can be doable. I think someone's planets touching my SN, too. You feel like you know them. I know this was off the subject, but just thought I would add it.

HI CRABBY.

---

Which is fine, it is more that when you meet people it is not as if they have their synastry chart on them.

posted January 01, 2013 11:25 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by crabbypatty:
hmmmm I think I might have honed in on what's at least partially responsible for this behavior ...you do have a natal moon square venus...right Padre ? That's based on a chart you posted way back when ... with a Buffalo place of birth ?

---

That is correct w/a moon square Mars as well.

posted January 01, 2013 11:27 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by crabbypatty:
and the venus sextile MC ....there is a lot of 'agreeable' in the chart ...but I am a novice so take it with a few grains of salt !

---

Perhaps to much, in my experience women are very intuitive and tend to want to sort of probe.

"No one is constantly that nice"

True, to a point, then again it would be better to just deal with that than poke around and see the ugly that I'm very careful with at all times.

posted January 01, 2013 11:28 PM            

See above post!

posted January 01, 2013 11:53 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by crabbypatty:
well you're right Padre ...a smart woman wants to probe. And that's good for both of you because it's better to know what you're potentially dealing with up front so you both can decide if you can handle one another's difficult facets before things get too serious. You might need a woman who knows your proclivity for maybe blowing up here and there ...and can handle it without falling apart and takin.g everything personally. So I say : fight a bit against your natal influence and say your truth from the get go !

Funny how I am better at giving advice to someone else !

---

To blunt, it is an odd place to be, the women I like are smarter and more bookish, the women who like me quickly tend to be ah, more primal.

I'm chatting with Ms Virgo and literally 3 very attractive women introduced themselves.

"Oh, I'm so and so, what is your name"?

Do not blame someone probing, I do the same myself, it is a smart play, do not care for the sort of sneaky way it happens sometimes.

As for advice, in my experience that is more of a confidence issue, it is always easier to "sweep" someone else's house than it is to sweep one own house.

posted January 02, 2013 12:13 AM            

quote:

---

always subverting one's own thoughts, feelings, desire, to make the person one is talking with feel better/more confident/more brilliant?

---