posted February 22, 2013 09:47 PM            

Uranus house 11 transit.
Who's going though this? Who has been there?

I've been going though this since my late teens.
Honestly I can't wait for it to be out of my 11th house.

Since 11th house has to do with friends. I'm sick of the instability in my social life.

Since this time so many people come and go, and sometimes come back.

When people leave that I don't want to...It just gets me really down. More than I show. Whether we've grown apart, or things end badly. It can just make me feel discouraged and down at times.
Definitely ups and downs in this area, like never before.

Just when I think I find a bomb group of friends that I fit in with...eventually things turn sour, and they end.

It like once something goes wrong...it just reminds me of all the downfalls sometimes. And I almost feel like I'm a f()ck up.

I've learned a lot. I'm afraid to be close to people sometimes. From falling out with highschool best friend, then making a new co-worker bestie at work...having a falling out with co-worker friend. Getting close with a girl...that I really thought genuinely wanted to be my friend BUT nope, not if I wasn't gonna get with her boyfriend's friend. I got the vibes from her that she was no longer interested, when I hit it off with their other friend. Like it's like fine, excuse me for having free will. I see how it is.

It just makes me feel hesitant to start over, and put myself out there sometimes. But life wont allow me to live that way forever...and then sometimes it's the same crap again.

I just wonder if this has anything to do with Uranus transiting the 11th.

I've had plenty of good times, don't get me wrong. And I have found stability in very few friends. And am thankful for that.

But ya know being an adult now and people doing their own things ya can't see your favorite most trusted people all the time (ya know, school, work, relationships, family theirs and mine)

So sometimes I think man I need more friends, and then I remember why I am not close to people of my past anymore. And think what's the point? I'm better off being alone for a while.

Ehh sorry I'm so down/in a funk tonight guys. Not everything is bad, but a few things happened lately. And it's starting to get to me and I'm in a downer mood. Just had to get that off my chest. Tomorrow will be better. But f()ck tonight.

Sometimes I feel like what I'm going though is normal and part of growing up, and sometimes I don't know.

I know I'm not the only one.

posted February 23, 2013 07:50 PM            

Interesting about Uranus in the 6th house. I kind of have the opposite thing going on with Saturn in my 6 house. Lost 20 pounds. Gym membership with one of my friends until it's nice enough to go running outside again.

I thought I'd check out some of my asteroids I have aspecting Uranus
its conjuncting Bacchus and Vesta.

Can kind of see Bacchus playing out in a way. Lots of drinking socializing with my friends have been canceled lately. One friend's 21st b-day got canceled, and she doesn't plan on rescheduling it. (she's a single mom and stuff)
Then my other friend wanted to go drinking on a Wednesday night. Was relieved when she canceled, since I had work in the morning. And last night I was invited to another 21st party. Wasn't that close with the girl having it, and when I found out the only other person I would know there, was too hung over to go(same girl who wanted to go drinking Wednesday night), I decided not to.

posted February 24, 2013 06:14 AM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Stawr:
yeah that's true, but hasn't aspected my sun yet.

Interesting about Uranus in the 6th house. I kind of have the opposite thing going on with Saturn in my 6 house. Lost 20 pounds. Gym membership with one of my friends until it's nice enough to go running outside again.

I thought I'd check out some of my asteroids I have aspecting Uranus
its conjuncting Bacchus and Vesta.

Can kind of see Bacchus playing out in a way. Lots of drinking socializing with my friends have been canceled lately. One friend's 21st b-day got canceled, and she doesn't plan on rescheduling it. (she's a single mom and stuff)
Then my other friend wanted to go drinking on a Wednesday night. Was relieved when she canceled, since I had work in the morning. And last night I was invited to another 21st party. Wasn't that close with the girl having it, and when I found out the only other person I would know there, was too hung over to go(same girl who wanted to go drinking Wednesday night), I decided not to.

My friend that I go to the gym with has Gemini Moon and Venus and her 11th house stuff has been rough at times too. She is so on and off with her one friend from highschool. I've whitnessed her having falling outs with other people. And her room mate who use to be her friend they got in a bad fight, to the point of violence.
So I might become the new room mate. We've lived together before. ;D

---

posted February 24, 2013 10:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ail221:
Transit Uranus is in my 11th house as well. It just creates a lot of instability. I have changed my groups of friends a lot over the last few years, it never lasts too long. Usually it involves friends ditching you in your time of need.

---

Oh yeah that sounds like what I'm going though.
Also friends that leave my life...will all of a sudden will get in touch with me if they NEED something from me, or a favor. This has happened a few times.
It's like 'yeah? Oh yeah!? And you're the one that thought you're too good for me!? YOU IMMORTAL FOOL! Now I see, it's the other way around! YOU SUCK!!'
haha but seriously...!!!

But luckily, some friends wanting to get back in touch with me genuinely do! Thank God, so there is hope for my views of humanity sometimes.

posted February 24, 2013 10:59 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by peregrine:
truth be told i'm excited for it to hit my h7! though i will whine about stability on the forum for sure and start topics like "where have the sane chicks gone" lol!

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posted February 24, 2013 01:16 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Stawr:
Oh yeah that sounds like what I'm going though.
Also friends that leave my life...will all of a sudden will get in touch with me if they NEED something from me, or a favor. This has happened a few times.
It's like 'yeah? Oh yeah!? And you're the one that thought you're too good for me!? YOU IMMORTAL FOOL! Now I see, it's the other way around! YOU SUCK!!'
haha but seriously...!!!

But luckily, some friends wanting to get back in touch with me genuinely do! Thank God, so there is hope for my views of humanity sometimes.

But yeah I'm afraid to make new friends, cause I can't take it anymore. But Uranus still has a long way to go in my 11th house.

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posted February 24, 2013 11:22 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by Stawr:
LOL!
Ha I'll be like in my 70's when Uranus is in my 7th house.
Yeah Saturn in my 7th hoping that will be good and stable. With a guy right now that doesn't believe in any labels...of any kind. I see where he's coming from, but then I think it's kind of douchy at times. I'm open minded...but not sure if I will always be cool with that. It's almost been a year.
But other than that I'm content most of the time. I know some women would be like "whatiya DOin!?" But guys that want to make it official right away are scary. So I'm with someone who is the extreme opposite.

---

lol they will be senile men from the retirement home that won't remember you the next hour.

yeah no labels are douchey. imagine a couple that believes in no labels! douche couple lol! i didn't even care, was just making conversation. u can keep your no label label lol!

posted March 09, 2013 03:37 PM            

The only friend that I can currently be close to is being a flake today. If she blows me off, I have a feeling I wont take it well. I'm just in a irritable mood today.

She texts me like I have a headache I think I'm getting sick lets go later....
Its like you're not up for it let me know, GOD! It's just rude, to cancel at the last minute, when that person could of just known right away, and spend their time and energy else where.

It's been two hours since her "nap" I'm about to text her like just let me know already.

She texts me on Tuesday like we gotta get back into the gym I said how about this weekend she said yeah, we also go grocery shopping together sometimes we plan on doing that too.
Part of my irritability is that I'm so ready to shop, I ate lunch and I'm still hungry and hardly have any food at my house. And just wanna know if we are going together today, or if I'm going solo.

She does leave me hanging for a long time sometimes...In her defense though, she does have 2 planets in Gemini.

She is friends with my sister too, and my sister has expressed her occasional annoying flakiness to me.

posted March 09, 2013 03:55 PM            

I only have one pair of sweat pants right now that I can wear in public. One pair is so over sized, and another pair bleach spilled on them.

posted April 07, 2013 10:45 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Stawr:

Getting close with a girl...that I really thought genuinely wanted to be my friend BUT nope, not if I wasn't gonna get with her boyfriend's friend. I got the vibes from her that she was no longer interested, when I hit it off with their other friend. Like it's like fine, excuse me for having free will. I see how it is.

---

I just had it clarified that I am not crazy for thinking this!
I've been keeping this inside for way to long and it eats away at me sometimes.

Those of you that don't know...here's the story...
Friend I've known since 2007/08...well by March 2011 I meet his older brother who I will call J, and some of his Friends, By the Summer I hung out with them even more.

Apparently, J took a liking to me, but the first time I met him my cousin was all over him. Anyone who touches my cousin/family...I can't see them in that light.
I got along well with J, it was obvious that he liked me...though he wouldn't confess. I liked hanging out with him as a friend and thought him being to shy to flat out say meant we could be friends and it would all be cool.

By December 2011 I hung out with J, his friend and his girl friend all the time for a while.
Yes that girl the one I was talking about in the quote.
Well she and her guy and other people in J's group where routing for us to get together.
Yeah they where all team Stawr and J.
They are all very good friends with J but since they haven't known me long, they couldn't respect that I didn't want it to go there!

by Feb 2012 their friend in the Marines who I will call M, ended up talking to me...just though fb the chemistry was insane! A few private messages between each other, and I couldn't help but think, wow this guy is a good catch.

Well I meet him in person by the end of April 2012. A few days of hanging out...our connection cannot be denied! We start wrestling! Then he gives me a kiss. But I kept wrestling with him. Then he escorts me to the bathroom when I come out, he gives me a hypnotic look(he's a scorpio haha) I can't move we are right in front of each other, looking at each other. We kiss/make out. Then he tells me that he likes me, and I told him I did too, and I felt so weird that I did since I hadn't met him in person yet. And he wanted to if I could tell he liked me. And I said "well I knew you had to at least like me cause why else would you talk to me"
Well I wasn't gonna screw him in the house his mom and brother where sleeping and all his friend's where in the garage. So I said "we better get back in there." Then I went home later. I'm sure he said goodbye to me and stuff. The next day he invited me over and no one else was there. So I was like ohhh!!!...! I think he has a plan. We drank and wrestled, and then IT happened. He wouldn't let me leave after so I slept with him until the next day...he almost didn't let me leave for work. This happened for the rest of his time home...and I could tell that some people in the group...where not impressed...but keeping it to them self.

posted April 07, 2013 11:36 PM            

Well me and M and everyone else was having a really good time. Me and M starting wildly flirting he was holding me upside down, sitting on me. Ya know. Then after the bon fire, M asked me if we wanted to go hang out at the couples house with J. So when me and M show up there...and the girl says "oh I didn't know you guys where going to be here" The way she said it, like she didn't want us there...and I know why. M is oblivious to it all.

I will talk more about this tomorrow...I need to unwind. Thinking about this and typing this is painful.

I'm going though some kind of emotional hell...I've been though emotional hells before...But the one I am going though...not many can see or tell I'm going though it...one of those everything is fine on the outside...but on the inside it's so unstable what I am feeling.

I do not feel understood by many people...

but my cousin told me that M's friends do talk about me, they don't hate me, but they are upset and disappointed in me. And they are not happy for us. I knew I wasn't crazy, and that it's not all in my head.

posted April 08, 2013 02:27 PM            

J has a girlfriend right? Most of the other friends are in relationships? I think it is very petty of them to not be happy to see you happy. The only reason I can possibly fathom for them to be upset or dissapointed is that they do not know how you feel about J, that you just want to be friends.

If you are happy with M, then don't let other people affect your happiness. If you want to, broach the topic with M, just let him know that you feel the others attitude has changed towards you in particular. Things like, "this is how I feel, this is what i'm feeling, I feel like,". If he cares about you such as he does, he is more than likely to have some empathy with you and want to help you feel better. There is that old quote, "The best way to hurt a man, is to hurt the woman he loves" because we feel powerless to do anything, even though most of the time we don't need to do anything, other than just be there and show we care.

Anyway... I get that not feeling like you're understood. If i'm brutally honest, for me it's because I don't want people to understand me, because I don't want them close to me. So I don't let people in, easily. That is something I am working through and understanding.

I really hope you feel better, 'tomorrow'.

- Chris

posted April 10, 2013 11:47 AM            

I don't know what I want him to do about it. But he really should know...
And hopefully he isn't upset that I never told him that his best friend liked me in the first place. But he could of told him.

And the really messed up thing is, is that this J guy has crushes on other girls at the same time too, so I don't get why it's such a big deal.

It's going to be hard cause M and J are best friends, and my intention is not to start drama or to make M feel like he is in the middle of this, and has to pick a side.

Oh yes I've told people plenty of times that me and J are not gonna happen. And I'd bluntly say he's hooked up with my cousin and I don't take seconds from family members.
I know to some people that's not a big deal, I'm sure some people in the group thought I was being closed minded...
I think they all had this disillusion that I would eventually come around.

But from what it sounds like people in the group still care about me and think I'll get hurt by M. And they think he is the type not to settle down. They think I buy the plane tickets to see him! WRONG.
M is the type that doesn't want people in his business. I think he's been hurt in the past by doing this or something. M doesn't want to make what we have all official cause he feels like it ruins things. I can see why he thinks that. He has a stellum(in Scorpio)

But maybe just maybe, if M told them that he cares about me to them...they would have more respect for me and get over it.

I feel really bad for M, having to find out that is best friend likes me, and is butt hurt that I like him instead.

But I will just have to remind him not to feel to bad since he's has crushes on other girls at the same time.

M means a lot to everyone in the group, so I think if he reveled more of his feelings towards me...I think that make everyone see how foolish they are being...and will want to make peace with their hostility towards me. Or at least try.

Yeah I don't think J has ever had a girl friend, but I saw him kiss my other friend one time. So I'm like cool! And he does get crushes on girls very easily that hang out with him and are nice to him. I think he likes this other girl right now. She has drug problems, and got kicked out of her parents, is living with him and is sleeping in the same bed as him. That's all I know.

posted May 12, 2013 08:32 PM            

My guy will be here in less than a week. Looking forward to it, but yeah that means those people who are only his friends now will be spending time with him. (and having to put up with me too)

BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not doing anything wrong, so I'm just gonna make the most of it. And if they allow themselves to...their true colors WILL SHOW! I'm choosing the high road. I'm not letting it eat away at me anymore. While they try to isolate me...I've been phoenixing. Cold shoulder me? FINE! I'll start running to blow off steam, and loose 20 pounds. And look fit as a did 6 years ago, but now confident in my skin! They can go ahead and destroy themselves.

I haven't told him yet, cause it's a lot to explain. And if I don't explain everything I sound like I'm jumping to conclusions, paranoid, all in my head.

Plus I WANT HIM TO HAVE A GOOD TIME WHILE HE'S HERE!

I don't want drama...no matter how maturely I tell him. It is conflict and drama that he has to deal with.

BUT after what just happened. I am getting weird vibes again...from those low life forms of people that are only his friends now!

posted May 12, 2013 09:34 PM            

Since he's gonna be here soon!

A day was set! A day that I had work on and had to call off work.

I was stressed a little about it last year. I never call off for pleasure. But they ended up changing it to the weekend...

So this time I told M I'm gonna wait a few days, cause last time ya'll changed your mind...and I can't be fickle like that calling off for a job...."this day...no wait this day...scratch that this day now" Annoying as fuq to me and them!

M is exited for up north. And has been hinting, and encouraging me to do it for days!

I AM JUST GETTING WEIRD VIBES...!!..!!!...

Cause a while after I told him I sent a group text asking someone to cover my a$$ please....he texts me saying "It might not even be going now..."

I know I sound paranoid...but would those people stoop so low...to cancel cause I KNOW, our happiness makes them unhappy.

As long as I am with him, they want nothing to do with me.

Their ill feelings towards me...is poisoning their friendship with M.

When they talk about him not being good for me. They are talking **** about him that I don't think he would appreciate.

And if they would cancel just cause they can't stand the thought of us sharing a tent together again...
They are taking away an up north experience that M was looking forward too.

I feel like they might possibly know, that I know. And that probably freaks them out.

posted May 22, 2013 01:24 PM            

I decided that if things get too weird I would have to say something to him.

And yes things got VERY WEIRD.

One day I came over to his place, and those 3 people I use to hang out with where there.

Went to a store with them all...drove separately with just M and I in my car, after that the other people didn't show back up at this house.

Before that, M was telling me they had a surprise for him.

That day I just had a bad feeling and a headache.

Hours later of hanging out in the garage with M his brother and their other friend who I believe is neutral... M told me that that those 3 who I use to hang out with wanted to take him to this beach as his surprise but they only wanted him to go...they kept texting him like "just you"

At first I was like "okay"...but then decided that I couldn't take it anymore and asked if I could talk to him about something.

He said "yeah". Since we weren't alone I asked him if we could step out. And I explained everything to him and started crying. And what does he do? Holds me and hugs me. And when I start really getting chocked up he and takes me to sit on this wall by his house and puts his arm around me.

He was a little shocked. He said something like "yeah I thought I knew my friends well"
And he also said "I may not cry over things, but that doesn't mean I don't have emotions and feel them." He said it so calm too.

And yes though out our conversation he would tell me how he notices them act funny around me or things related to me.

And I was right about them canceling up north over me.
M made it an event on fb. Invited me and other people.

And yes he told me that someone (he wouldn't name) said "why are you inviting all these other people?!" M was like "what do you mean I thought we where cool with all those people." and then they told M it was canceled right after that.

But anyways after all that he says "well I'm definitely not going to that beach now" and I explained to him that I support him being friends with them, and that he doesn't have to do that. But he already made up his mind. And we where gonna spend the night together.

He hung out with me and my parents that night and slept over with me.

But yes I've been moved to tears how people in their mid 20's can act like they are in middle school and act out on jealously in such a way, and also moved to tears how well M treats me.

But yes those people are still M's friends, but at least now he knows about their jealously, hasn't been hanging with those people since I told him. But I'm sure he wants to and I may need to give him time to do that.