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Topic: 19 Words That Will Make People LIke You More
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Randall Webmaster Posts: 40747 From: Saturn next to Charmainec Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 18, 2014 11:51 AM
Want to make a better first impression and engender positive feelings that last a long time? Focus on what you say as much as what you do.First impressions can lead to lasting impressions. So to improve, a lot of people will tell you to dress better, read more (so you'll have interesting things to talk about), and ensure that your online presence is respectable (because many people will check you out online before meeting in person). But, how far will that get you? Despite what many people would like to believe, the things you say often make an even greater early impression than the things you do. To take advantage of that and get you started easily, here are 19 words--grouped into a handful of easy phrases--that you should make a habit of saying every day. They're virtually guaranteed to improve your standing with others if you use them often enough. Words No. 1 and 2: "Sir" and "ma'am" American culture is pretty informal compared to many other places in the world, but a little bit of formality can really make you stand out in a positive way. I carry this inclination from the military, and also from having been a lawyer in the federal court system. These are environments in which people use the titles "Sir" and "Ma'am" constantly--not just in talking with high ranking military officers, but also addressing civilians. I know that this doesn't work in every situation, but using these titles can be a sign of respect that gets people's attention. It can be important in professional relationships, especially when dealing with people you don't know well, and who are older or more experienced than you. Words No. 3 and 4: "You're welcome." Sometime in fairly recent history it seems people stopped saying, "You're welcome," and started substituting, "Yep," or, "No problem." At the risk of sounding older than I am, I think this is a step in the wrong direction--at least in a business or professional setting. Why? Because ditching "you're welcome" for these other phrases changes the message. "You're welcome" acknowledges that you've done something worth someone else's thanks, while "no problem" suggests that it wasn't that big of a deal. Saying the former phrase conveys that you think it was a worthwhile favor. That's an impressive message to send. Words No. 5 to 7: "Here's what's happening." If you've ever worked in an environment in which people guarded information like a valuable commodity, you'll appreciate how much affinity you develop for the few people who try to keep everyone else accurately informed. Of course you don't want to be a know-it-all or spread rumors. However, even if you don't know the full story, being willing to share the information you have that affects others' lives can make you instantly more likable. Words No. 8 to 11: "How can I help?" Nobody accomplishes anything amazing alone. Thus, with the exception of the sociopaths among us, we're all eventually grateful to those who help us achieve great things. I think we're especially grateful to those who proactively try to help. This doesn't mean you have to go way out of your way to offer assistance, but it's often the case that you have access to something or the ability to do something that won't take much on your part, but that can really have a positive impact on someone else's success. Words #12 to 15: "I'll find out." This is one of my favorite phrases. It's related to "how can I help," but is even more proactive. It says that you're not only willing to offer assistance, but that you're willing to go out of your way to do so. (By the way, this helpful phrase is also the diametric opposite of the most bureaucratic phrase known to humankind, uttered incessantly by some of the least likable people: "That's not my job.") Words No. 16 to 19: "I believe in you." Henry Ford recalled that when he was still an unknown, and was working on gasoline engines, a few short words of encouragement from an already famous Thomas Edison were a massive shot in the arm. It's amazing how just a little bit of validation from other people can inspire people to work harder and achieve more. Four short words can have a huge, positive impact--both for the people you're encouraging, and for their feelings toward you. https://smallbusiness.yahoo.com/advisor/19-words-people-more-140000312.html IP: Logged |
Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 3567 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted May 18, 2014 01:11 PM
One of the wisest things I've heard in all of this Randall is you can have everything you want if you help other people get what they wantTHAT is the mindset to have IP: Logged |
Chiemi Moderator Posts: 1705 From: Michigan Registered: Feb 2012
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posted May 18, 2014 01:19 PM
quote: Originally posted by Padre35:
One of the wisest things I've heard in all of this Randall is you can have everything you want if you help other people get what they wantTHAT is the mindset to have
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LeeLoo2014 Moderator Posts: 2272 From: Registered: Mar 2014
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posted May 18, 2014 02:18 PM
My Mars in Libra, Cancer DSC and Moon/Venus in 7th love these! Thanks.IP: Logged |
Ellynlvx Moderator Posts: 8075 From: the Point of Light within the Mind of God Registered: Aug 2013
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posted May 18, 2014 02:33 PM
Truly, you are a Man for all Seasons and are to be commended as such.I Honour You. quote:
"Realization" you are a man who walks in quiet carefully avoiding waterfalls of words your feelings run in tranquil streams flowing surely into the deeper ocean ****************************of your passions there was once a troubled time when I required your loyalty insured aloud your devotion spoken constantly, to calm my restless spirit and you were patient with my fears but you are a man wrapped soft in silence not trusting paragraphs of promises believing faithfulness is not **********************a verbal thing and now, at last, I know your love for me cannot be found in speeches nor in ballads of eternal declaration but in the touch of your hand on mine and the song of longing ***************in your quiet eyes by heart I know the lyric as a lullaby is memorized in childhood and hear its melody each time I submit to your strength ****each time I am conquered by your gentleness
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Padre35 Knowflake Posts: 3567 From: Asheville, NC, US Registered: Jul 2012
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posted May 18, 2014 02:36 PM
Further, I think people are far far to hard on themselves and even when they do achieve or handle a situation..they never reward themselves.Those two things make life a grind, not the fun journey it is meant to be. Article mentions reading books to have interesting things to say, why not take pictures of interesting things as a way to stimulate the positive thoughts that just vibe off of people. Consider that even twenty yrs ago, taking pics was an expensive proposition, now digital cameras are everywhere. IP: Logged |
Ellynlvx Moderator Posts: 8075 From: the Point of Light within the Mind of God Registered: Aug 2013
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posted May 19, 2014 12:33 AM
quote: Words No. 3 and 4: "You're welcome."Sometime in fairly recent history it seems people stopped saying, "You're welcome," and started substituting, "Yep," or, "No problem." At the risk of sounding older than I am, I think this is a step in the wrong direction--at least in a business or professional setting. Why? Because ditching "you're welcome" for these other phrases changes the message. "You're welcome" acknowledges that you've done something worth someone else's thanks, while "no problem" suggests that it wasn't that big of a deal. Saying the former phrase conveys that you think it was a worthwhile favor. That's an impressive message to send.
But what if they're Vampires?
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Ellynlvx Moderator Posts: 8075 From: the Point of Light within the Mind of God Registered: Aug 2013
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posted May 20, 2014 03:35 AM
One must have ones priories straight, after all.IP: Logged |
lalalinda Moderator Posts: 3840 From: nevada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 20, 2014 03:46 PM
Wonderful piece Randall, thanks for sharing that with us.IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 40747 From: Saturn next to Charmainec Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 20, 2014 04:08 PM
You're welcome! Good to see you here in the basement. quote: Originally posted by lalalinda: Wonderful piece Randall, thanks for sharing that with us.
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Ellynlvx Moderator Posts: 8075 From: the Point of Light within the Mind of God Registered: Aug 2013
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posted May 20, 2014 04:46 PM
Oh, Good Gravy, why do they always go into the basement?IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 55060 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted May 26, 2014 07:58 AM
Great article! Thanks Randall.------------------ Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Catalina Knowflake Posts: 1786 From: shamballa Registered: Aug 2013
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posted May 26, 2014 12:29 PM
Please and Thank You are good words to use too.How about "I'm sorry" when you find you have been wrong or hurt/disrespected someone? Whether in personal or business relationships, these are so invaluable they are often described as the "magic words"...and are sorely underused by most lately. IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve Moderator Posts: 8074 From: Registered: Dec 2010
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posted May 26, 2014 12:37 PM
Calling someone by their name is usually a positive thing, as well, unless it's done in a condescending way.You make more of an impact on someone if you include their name while talking to them. E.g. "Thank you, Martha." IP: Logged |
KarkaQueen Knowflake Posts: 3650 From: Uranus Registered: May 2011
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posted May 26, 2014 01:10 PM
Ma'am is so ugly to me. Mademoiselle for unmarried women and Madame for married ones.IP: Logged |
Randall Webmaster Posts: 40747 From: Saturn next to Charmainec Registered: Apr 2009
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posted May 28, 2014 05:44 PM
In the South, it's polite and expected.IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 3858 From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted May 28, 2014 06:38 PM
Ma'am and sir creep me out. I lived in Georgia awhile as a child and whilst common there; it just seems rude in the Great Lakes regions. I would generally only use it on a person who is for sure like over 85 years old; unless there was a need to address a stranger such as: "Sir! You dropped your wallet!" Or when talking with law enforcement and such. I had being called ma'am and if I were a guy, same for being addressed as sir. Sir is less offensive/demeaning than ma'am, even though not as respectful as a royal "sir" label. So it seems like a form of mockery for non "sirs".
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Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 3858 From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted May 28, 2014 06:40 PM
quote: Originally posted by Catalina: Please and Thank You are good words to use too.How about "I'm sorry" when you find you have been wrong or hurt/disrespected someone? Whether in personal or business relationships, these are so invaluable they are often described as the "magic words"...and are sorely underused by most lately.
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