posted June 05, 2015 09:46 AM            

No.1 - jealousy/nastiness on his part towards me. I then visited my sister who was living in Australia at the time for 6 weeks. When I came back and we met up again there was just nothing there any more for me, and we split up fairly promptly after that.
No. 2 - I just wasn't attracted to him anymore. (We ended up friends years later though)
No. 3 - He hit me. Once is enough in my book.

The shorter term ones: something they did turned me off them, or they were too clingy, or controlling.

posted June 05, 2015 10:18 AM            

1) He had really bad hygiene issues which led to a sexless relationship which ultimately culminated in infidelity (on my part, which I then confessed to). Despite my utter misery, I wasn't the one who ended this relationship, though the confessed infidelity could be seen as a sort of self-sabotage.
2) He had a horrible temper which often resulted in a barrage of verbal abuse and holes in more than one door in our apartment (same guy as #1)
3) He had a horrible temper which resulted in a barrage of verbal abuse and finally, striking me while drunk on New Year's Eve. In my case, once wasn't enough, it was when he struck me a second time, a year after the first time that I said, "This isn't an error in judgment, this is a pattern and I have to end this."
4) He would often go to events with me but abruptly leave me there, going home early. While annoying and a corrosive contributing factor to our breakup, this wasn't ultimately the main cause of our breakup as I knew at the start that I was dealing with someone with severe social issues and anxiety.

Once a relationship has been declared official and we're not just casually dating/getting to know each other, the only reasons I would end it are infidelity or physical abuse. So if I've had a short-term relationship that hadn't even had the chase to sort of devolve into that, it wasn't my idea to end it, ever. Pretty predictable given my 5 fixed placements plus fixed ascendant. I can't even tell you the number of guys (almost all mutable signs) who broke up with me only to regret it later and think that we could do the on/off thing or I'd take them back. No. Once a fixed stellium accepts change (since we rarely instigate it), the change is permanent.

posted June 05, 2015 12:08 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Aquacheeka:
I can't even tell you the number of guys (almost all mutable signs) who broke up with me only to regret it later and think that we could do the on/off thing or I'd take them back. No. Once a fixed stellium accepts change (since we rarely instigate it), the change is permanent.

---

I can relate to that (although I have a lot of planets in mutable Virgo). They often contact me months later out of the blue and say they miss me. By that time this mutable woman (I do have Aqua moon and Leo Venus though) regards them with mild amusement and disdain. I'm pretty sure they want the friends with benefits scenario (relationships with these types of guys generally never progressed to anything serious in the first place) but I'm just not into that. Communication is important to me with someone but if they haven't communicated with me at the time I wanted them to, then they're not worthy of my time now.

posted June 06, 2015 09:40 AM            

I ended it with a guy I was with for four years a few months ago. For three of those years I was debating leaving but I just was too afraid of being alone, because at least I had someone and I didn't want to start over.

I felt like we were roommates instead of a couple. I would cry a lot, he would do stuff that wasn't so nice, he cheated on me in our own house we owned together. And through all that, I stayed. Until I realized that when I went home to my parents house, I was myself again- my normal happy self and I missed that feeling. And then I felt a shift in my personality when I went back to the home we shared because I was miserable.