posted March 17, 2019 06:51 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by StubbornVirgo:
As someone who was stalked and assaulted while trying to walk out to her car after a college class, I can personally attest to how meaningful this article really is.

I've sent "made it home okay" texts every day since that happened. Due to my long commute to and from work, I also send "made it to work okay" and "leaving work" texts to my family once I've made it out of the parking lot and am in my work or my car. These are more for my family. I think they're more traumatized than I am, fearing that one day that assault will turn into something even worse. It's easy to see why...I was lucky once. There's no guarantee that I will be lucky again.

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posted January 22, 2020 10:32 AM            

About the only reason I have texting is for emergencies. 'Course I gotta worry about kids being somewhere very different than they claim, but I don't make them take a picture to prove it (though I would given reason, but I wouldn't tolerate an adult doing this to me, nor would I do to it to an adult).

But the article isn't so much about that for those thinking it was. Still, it's nothing new...and for those that it might make feel better...some men who do step up:

WWYD: Two Guys Drug College Girl's Drink

WWYD: Woman receives unwanted attention

There are a whole bunch like that, including men trying to lure teen girls or domestic battery in public, but as I know it would trigger some I won't post those. Lots of men and women will step up. (Likewise, there was one in which a woman pretends to drug a man's drink and it's a woman who steps up to warn him while a group of men who saw it laughed it off thinking he got what deserved for being so stupid as to leave his drink unattended. I'm sure I can find that one again if you want.)

Of course many won't. I think back and I remember absurd situations I've had to deal with in which everyone turned away even in broad daylight or otherwise tried to sweep it all under the rug so they're not inconvenienced in any way. But there have been times when people intervened and I (and we) should remember those as well. It's too easy to remember the bad and forget the good, especially when certain groups try to divide us against each other rather than unite us.

Oh, bonus! A guy grabs a waitress's butt, and like in so many movies she smacks him down...what was really great is that her male boss said that was awesome! (I know more than once I've hesitated to defend myself even verbally or ran instead of pressing charges for fears, right or wrong, that I'd--or someone close to me--would be the one targeted for retribution for upsetting the hegemony, but it's not always like that, so I loved that part of her supported by her boss.)

posted March 11, 2021 10:32 AM            

quote:

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I don’t even know how to word this because I feel like my words can’t do justice to how many women are feeling right now. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Sarah Everard and how a woman was not allowed to walk home. It’s unbearable. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
I’ve also felt a deep sense of connection between myself and other women this week. I’ve had conversations about how being hyper-conscious of our safety is just something we’ve done throughout our entire lives. The deep sense of connection is one of fear. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
We have all shared our live locations.
We have all changed our shoes.
We have all held our keys between our fingers.
We have all made phone calls, both real and fake.
We have all tucked our hair inside our coats.
We have all ran down dark roads.
We have all theorised our escape routes. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
What’s so insidious is that these things don’t even feel like ‘special safety tools’. They’re literally just engrained behaviours and actions we’ve had to pick up since we were little girls. Because ’that’s just the way it is.’ ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
‘Text me when you get home xxx’ is a standard procedure amongst women. Auto-pilot. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
I wish more men understood the fact that we cannot walk alone at night with headphones in.
That whenever we get in Ubers, there’s the lingering thought this could be it.
That whenever you say ‘they’re just being friendly’, you are part of the problem.
That whenever we walk past groups of men, our heart beats a little bit faster.
That whenever we shout back at sexual harrassment in the street, we take yet another gamble at risking our safety. ⠀ ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
Stop harassing women.
Stop victim-blaming women.
And stop burdening women with the weight of other men’s actions. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
A woman should have been allowed to walk home.

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posted July 21, 2021 09:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
[QUOTE]
I don’t even know how to word this because I feel like my words can’t do justice to how many women are feeling right now. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Sarah Everard and how a woman was not allowed to walk home. It’s unbearable. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
I’ve also felt a deep sense of connection between myself and other women this week. I’ve had conversations about how being hyper-conscious of our safety is just something we’ve done throughout our entire lives. The deep sense of connection is one of fear. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
We have all shared our live locations.
We have all changed our shoes.
We have all held our keys between our fingers.
We have all made phone calls, both real and fake.
We have all tucked our hair inside our coats.
We have all ran down dark roads.
We have all theorised our escape routes. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
What’s so insidious is that these things don’t even feel like ‘special safety tools’. They’re literally just engrained behaviours and actions we’ve had to pick up since we were little girls. Because ’that’s just the way it is.’ ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
‘Text me when you get home xxx’ is a standard procedure amongst women. Auto-pilot. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
I wish more men understood the fact that we cannot walk alone at night with headphones in.
That whenever we get in Ubers, there’s the lingering thought this could be it.
That whenever you say ‘they’re just being friendly’, you are part of the problem.
That whenever we walk past groups of men, our heart beats a little bit faster.
That whenever we shout back at sexual harrassment in the street, we take yet another gamble at risking our safety. ⠀ ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
Stop harassing women.
Stop victim-blaming women.
And stop burdening women with the weight of other men’s actions. ⠀
⁠⠀⁠⠀
A woman should have been allowed to walk home.

---

posted August 15, 2021 09:36 AM            

http://amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/mar/03/incel-movement-terror-threat-canada
http://amp.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/aug/13/plymouth-shootings-may-be-a-sign-the-incel-culture-is-spreading