Posts: 12783
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 06, 2022 08:25 PM            

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In one of my recent threads, several people expressed curiosity about how I relate to women in real life and specifically how my Asperger's factors into my predicament. First off, it's been pretty much universally stated that I appear mostly "normal," whatever that means. But my thing is I don't smile as much and have more of a flat affect. I can understand humor and sarcasm and I can tell when someone is definitely disinterested in me. Like for example when I speak to a woman and she gives me a one word answer without even looking at me.

I feel like I'm pretty good in most social situations and my level of success in other areas of life outside dating suggests that I'm not wrong. It's just dating scenarios with women are so ambiguous in my opinion. I never feel like I know where they are coming from or how they are really feeling at any given time. I always have this sense that I'm communicating with someone who speaks a completely different language when I interact with women. And it feels like they are the dominant group that expects me to know their language and they treat me like a second class citizen when I don't know how to speak it. They also don't meet me halfway and try to communicate with me at all. That's my emotional experience with women.

I also have really bizarre and painful experiences. Like once, I connected with a girl from POF and we were going to be fwbs but then she reconnected with an old boyfriend right before we could have sex and they are now married. I have those kinds of weird experiences all the time. It's like the universe enjoys teasing me honestly. It's never an age appropriate single woman who is available to me and local. Oh that's another thing! I'll meet stunning women online from far away but never anyone close enough that we could meet up and go do something tonight. It's always a woman from across the country or globe. Meanwhile, local women treat me so bad that I completely doubt my self worth. Oh, and currently at work there's a 46-year-old woman who seems interested in me but she is married and she is just as ambiguous and hard to read as young women. First off, she is married. I would definitely be interested if she wasn't. That's how it always is for me. Some married chick or some incredible woman from across the country or globe who says "You're so wonderful. Why are you single?"🤯😩

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Posts: 12783
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 07, 2022 11:46 AM            

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Also, after many dates and meetups where I never heard back from the women I sent them texts or emails asking if there was something I did that was wrong or that upset them. I never once got any helpful feedback and most of the time they straight up ignored me. I have also experimented with letting women know about my diagnosis and as far as I can tell that hasn't made any difference in how they treat me or interact with me, so I don't much see the point in even talking about it anymore honestly. Women are still just as unwilling to meet me halfway and communicate with me.

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Posts: 12783
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 11, 2022 10:15 AM            

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As a guy, how do you meet women when dating apps are lame, clubs and bars are lame, and it's taboo to even talk to strangers? It's funny to me that the only places where it's socially acceptable to talk to strangers are the places that are so loud that you can't even hear yourself think, much less have conversation. It all seems hopelessly clown world to me.

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Posts: 12783
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 24, 2022 09:39 PM            

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Posts: 12783
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted August 26, 2022 04:59 PM            

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I give up on women. Y'all are hopelessly complex and too difficult to deal with. This week a new semester started and there is an older woman in most of my classes who has been very friendly with me. The first several days in class she greeted me by name and initiated conversations and even broke the touch barrier multiple times (touching my hand and arm during conversation). Based off her energy towards me, I thought it was safe to initiate a friendly conversation on the app the students use to keep in contact with each other about classes. I was just friendly and casual and still got left on read after a few messages and then she acted different towards me in class today. It was like I didn't even exist. Women make no sense to me.

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