posted June 21, 2009 04:55 PM            

In my synastry with a man I lived in a committed relationship/commonlaw marriage with for 14 years, his Boda falls in my 7th house, conjunct my Venus.

In my synastry with the younger male friend I have a crush on, with whom there is not really any longterm relationship potential, his Boda falls in my 7th house, conjunct my Venus.

It makes me wonder, because usually with guys my attraction to them has grown over time (even with guys I've gotten really obsessed with later)...the thing in common with my feelings for these guys is I thought they were both gorgeous, exciting, and magnificent at first sight. So I am wondering whether Boda contributes to just instant attraction/lust too.

In the synastry with the guy I have a crush on, my Groom is also exactly conjunct his AC and my Briede is conjunct his Vertex. With my ex my Briede was conjunct his DC.

posted June 22, 2009 06:04 AM            

to get these percentages, which aspects, orb and planets / asteroids did you use?

I actually have done a minor research over 20 synastry charts on the weekend, including the long lasting seemingly happy couples and those we refer to as "passionate" and which were somewhat destructive, too.
I was surprised to find that Valentine was there, no matter if in the happy ones or in the passionate ones.
I noticed that Valentine often aspected Sun (very often as a conjunction) or IC interestingly.

posted June 22, 2009 08:58 AM            

So between Boda and Union, I'd give more importance to Union.

Lucia23, do you think that Boda might have been the (astrological) reason of the attraction? Although I'd think that it might have more to do with your Groom aspecting that guy's AC, coz it could mean that he seems an ideal groom image. It feels a bit weird to me to relate attraction with Boda, since it has more to to with the celebration more than wanting to be together.

posted June 22, 2009 02:56 PM              

BODA - is a portuguese word.it is symbolic of the wedding as the ceremony itself.Our word for marriage as the relationship itself is more called as "casamento".

However i also consider Boda to be very very important as it usually indicates the person with whom we see or feel like our natural life partner.

with me and my partner we have

His BODA cj my Moon and UNITAS
MY BODA exact cj his "ADAM" - like adam/even i linked it into this one cause it might indicate also the natural partner.

see the Eva/Adam in the Bible?

the other asteroids also figure quite strongly:

my Union exact cj his ASC
his UNIION opose my Venus

My Briede cj his Venus
his BRiede and NN cj my MC

HIS groom cj my EVA exact

My House and Groom cj his Destinn
his HOUSE cj my IC

My UNITAS cj his BODA

hAVE YOU LOOKED into your name asteroids with these ones?They usually show important conections too.

DRACOS Are also a very intuitive tool:

my D.Boda cj his D. ASC
hiS D.ADam cj my D.VENUS

MY D.BRIEDE cj his D.IC

MY D.EVA cj his D.HOUSE

HIS D. KARMA exact cj my D.GROOM
his D.BRIEDE and ADAMS cj my D.NN

posted June 22, 2009 03:16 PM            

quote:

---

Lucia23, do you think that Boda might have been the (astrological) reason of the attraction? Although I'd think that it might have more to do with your Groom aspecting that guy's AC, coz it could mean that he seems an ideal groom image. It feels a bit weird to me to relate attraction with Boda, since it has more to to with the celebration more than wanting to be together.

---

The reason it strikes me is that they are two very different relationships--one with a guy I was involved with for years, another just a crush.

I didn't know Valentine was so important. I have Valentine aspects with both men--with the crush, my Valentine and Groom are BOTH conjunct his Ascendent. But he DEFINITELY does not appear as an ideal Groom to me...more like a very fun friend who I want to have sex with.

With the crush, my Boda is also exactly conjunct his Tyche, and my Tyche is exactly conjunct his Venus.

I'm having trouble figuring out what all these different asteroids REALLY mean and how to understand different relationships in synastry. Because so many people have intense asteroid connections with people they have unsatisfying relationships with or one-sided crushes on...statistically, you would have to look at not only the percentage of mutual attractions with, say, Valentine involved, but the percentage of relationships where Valentine is involved, yet there is no mutual attraction.

If I go on astro.com, I notice I have intense, soul-matey synastry with several of my friend's boyfriends who I've never met (they live out of state and I have checked out their synastry as a favor)...one of my good friends has total "soul mate" synastry with my ex-boyfriend, and they HAVE met, but he was more into me and she is more into her husband (who I have what I think could be seen as "better" synastry with.) We all like each other very much, and if we'd met at different times or in different ways, maybe we would've allowed different attractions to develop, or maybe not.

posted June 22, 2009 03:27 PM            

Did you feel an "at first sight" attraction?

Also, do you have strong synastry between personal planets? Which house of his does your Sun fall into and vice-versa?

posted June 22, 2009 03:32 PM            

That is absolutely true.
I have been thinking about this myself, and I think, every research should consider this, too.

What I have noticed some years ago, is that

"That little comparision shows that these double whammies with ASC or IC are indeed rare, and appear quite often in relationships, that have at least high soulmate-potential.
Also, those double whammies seem to involve planets, that rule the important relationship houses (1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th) or MC."

I had found those connections in the synastries of:
Antonio Banderas - Melanie Griffith
Brad PItt - Angelina Jolie (In their case it was because of DW of Vertex and BML to ASC though)
Paul Mc Cartney - linda Eastman
Paul Newmann - Joanne Woodward
Richard Burton - Liz Taylor

And then I picked random people from my list:

Antonio Banderas - madonna
no connection

Jude Law - Kate Winslet
nothing

Leonardo Di Caprio - Kate Winslet
nothing

Orlando Bloom - Madonna
nothing

It was just a short glance, I know.

My superficial and preliminary conclusion was:

"Double whammies with ASC should be:
1. with planets which rule the 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th or 10th house

2. within a reasonable orb (2° - 3° max.)

3. the connecting planet should fall into the 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th or 10th house of the other person (at least one way).

this seems to work for Equal as well as Placidus"

I don`t know if that works in the majority of cases. 5 examples are really not enough. lol
But it seems that houserulers are significant.

posted June 22, 2009 03:40 PM              

you are right:it was love at first sight.

one month passed and we were already dating.a very beautiful story but im suspect isnt it?

we see each other like the natural life partner.i think that these asteroids show rightly that!

we have some nice personal ones like

his Sun exact cj my ASC
my sun/ven falss into his 2nd - i feel this one like if he makes me more secure more self valued and nurished.i dont see this one like the often called "financial security".

His venus cj my Merc and his MOON falls into my 5TH.

my Jup/Uranus/nep falls into his 5th

Although the Dracos are more soften felt,we have some pretty nice ones too here:

sAME sign of our venus
his venus cj my sun
my merc cj his IC
my asc cj his saturn
my IC cj his DSC
HIS moon fall into my 4th

posted June 22, 2009 04:02 PM            

well, I think a tight DW is of course more rare than a single aspect and therefore more unique.
But of course you are right. There are many people out there with whom we might share these, even though I remember that my synastric Bride-Groom-DW conjunction had a probability of one in a billion like IQ explained to me; that was because it was a DW AND those were complimentary asteroids, maybe that is what we should focus more on? Paired asteroids? Like Venus and Mars, or Pluto and Proserpina?

But even so, yes, we share these with more people; I know I shared a DW conjunction of Valentine-NN with a musical actor. And even though I surely find him very nice and good and there is a great deal of affinity, he isn`t a soulmate.

I think, we will maybe never be able to clearly predict who will fall in love with whom at what time; all we can do is approach the subject and come as close to the truth as possible.

But if you want my opinion, I think, the reason for the hooking up of some people is on different levels in the chart (I will leave out the common-sense-issues for now; you know age, sexual preference, opportunity, etc.):

1. natal charts
2. synastric comparision
3. progressions and transits

Only if all comes together, there will be a relationship.

Example:
I met a guy a year ago, with whom i had such amazing synastry, really sizzling and all, and there was surely a bit of a flirtative atmosphere when we met, but nothing happened.
We have Sun-Moon-conjunction, venus-Mars-trine, the ruler of his 7th house conjunct my ASC, the ruler of my 7th house conjuncts his Sun and Moon and so on.

So why didn`t something happen?

Well, first of all, and that is the most important point: he has a girlfriend.

And secondly, even with all these nice synastric aspects there were two weaknesses:
1. our natal charts weren`t as compatible as it may have seemed on the first glance; he didn`t have anything to "feed" my Venus-Pluto-square. He had Venus weakly square Pluto himself, but this was trumped over by other aspects.

2. the main weakness was the progressed charts.
No matter how I twisted and turned it, there was just nothing ahppening, except for an exact progressed Venus-Uranus-trine, which described that unusual meeting pretty well. And the fact that we were also chatting a bit about astrology. lol

So I think we really have to consider many things, but must also be aware of the risk of including too much. *sighs* Difficult to keep the balance there.

That is why I love the angles so much and the houserulers, they are so fast moving.

posted June 22, 2009 04:04 PM            

well, we are looking for really unique situations.

BTW Jude and me fall out of that, too.
We have the Neptune-ASC-DW, but Neptune rules 3rd house in Placidian system. (in equal it would be 4th house though).

But maybe t hat was TOO narrow, just maybe.
Maybe it would be enough to have a DW of houserulers.

posted June 22, 2009 04:05 PM            

DD, have you found (like IQ hunk) that Valentine is especially important?

You are looking at performers (for whom the first house/ASC is especially significant natally)--it would be interesting to do the same sort of study with top scholars or humanitarians or doctors. Maybe different houses would take on greater importance, in conjunction with different life priorities.

posted June 22, 2009 04:12 PM            

quote:

---

But if you want my opinion, I think, the reason for the hooking up of some people is on different levels in the chart (I will leave out the common-sense-issues for now; you know age, sexual preference, opportunity, etc.):

1. natal charts
2. synastric comparision
3. progressions and transits

Only if all comes together, there will be a relationship.

Example:
I met a guy a year ago, with whom i had such amazing synastry, really sizzling and all, and there was surely a bit of a flirtative atmosphere when we met, but nothing happened.
We have Sun-Moon-conjunction, venus-Mars-trine, the ruler of his 7th house conjunct my ASC, the ruler of my 7th house conjuncts his Sun and Moon and so on.

So why didn`t something happen?

Well, first of all, and that is the most important point: he has a girlfriend.

---

Given all this, how can we REALLY use astrology in a constructive way to HELP OURSELVES GET WHAT WE WANT/NEED in love?
(Not a rhetorical question--I'd love suggestions!)

posted June 22, 2009 04:22 PM            

"DD, have you found (like IQ hunk) that Valentine is especially important?"
So far it seems so. I am still researching. But I actually found that it is often aspecting Sun (very often as conjunction) or has any aspects to IC on a first glance.
And I have been only looking at VAlentine aspects to Sun, Moon, ASC and IC; I want to expand this research to Venus, Mars, and NN though.
The problem is if we compare it to too many planets, we will OF COURSE find seemingly significant connections.

"You are looking at performers (for whom the first house/ASC is especially significant natally)"
Yes, but those DW were not always connected to their 1st houses, I often have found 4th and 8th house interaction,t oo, and of course 5th house, but that is fitting for performers, too.

"--it would be interesting to do the same sort of study with top scholars or humanitarians or doctors."
Definitely, even though I assume, that for relationships humans will be pretty simple: It`s all about love, sex (procreation) and security.

"n conjunction with different life priorities."
Yes, definitely.
I alos think that osmeone who has DSC-ruler in 11th house for example, could be drawn to people whose personal planets fall in his 11th house, because the 11th house is part of his relationship pattern, whereas for someone without that correlation, it would be just a friendship vibe but not romantic.

posted June 22, 2009 04:22 PM            

" Several of the committed relationships/marriages do not have AC/IC double whammies."
Well, I didn`t want to say that my theory or findings are the end of all research. ACtually we are only at the beginning.

Maybe there is not even a general "relationship-pattern", maybe it is much more intervowen with the natal charts, then we really give them credit for.

For example: Ruler of my 7th house is Mercury.
I can`t tell you how many times I have developed insane crushes on Peopole with Pisces ASC or Sagittarius ASC or GEmini ASC and additionally there were ALWAYS many many Mercury-aspects. It`s a must! Just like Pluto aspecting Venus or Mars or Sun or Moon or ASC is a MUST. (Venus squares Pluto, and Venus rules 5th house of romance)
For me that is.

But Sun-Moon-conjunction? Well, it`s nice to have, but not necessary. Venus-Mars-conjunction - it depends. If his Venus conjuncts my Mars it`s rather nice, but more spiritual and caring(it is also conjunct Neptune then, and Mars conjuncts my 4th house and falls in the 12th house, very soulful, but NOT sexy).

But if it is his Mars conjunct my Capricorn Venus, it is ultra strong. It makes me go compoletely gaga, no matter what else is there.
Why?
Well, as I said, Venus rules my 5th house, falls in my 1st house and squares Pluto. So their Mars would trigger that "erotic-string" inside me, and it resounds loudly in my soul or somewhere else.

It works even with celebrities, they ALL trigger that, if not they donīt interest me. And it holds true for real life, too. On a different level, of course.

Show me a guy with Mars on 5° - 10° Capricorn and I`ll be a goner.

posted June 22, 2009 04:34 PM            

Hmm, maybe we expect too much of astrology?
it is no magic wand that will make the love of our life just materialise from thin air or persuade him to stay, if he wants to leave.

All it can do is DESCRIBE a certain chemistry / connection etc. and maybe help us understand what is really going on.

But we still know so little about astrology, and about how it works.
All we can say is that with certain connection there is a certain "likelihood" for romance or whatever.

But it can`t get us what we need or want. WE have to do that ourselves. Maybe it can be a bit of a guidance though.

I still am completely amazed about the progressed synastry research by Paul Westran.
But of course we also have connections with people that we do not meet.
Even though, it was so interesting. Last year I was at an open air musical concert, and one of the actors came down from stage and kissed my hand. It was just a part of the show, of course, but still, why did he pick me and not the beautiful girl beside me?
And it turned out he was staying at the very same hotel as I did. It was kinda funny.

Even funnier, at that time we had in the progression a Venus-Venus and Venus-Sappho-aspect in air signs. ROFL

Of course we didn`t start a relationship, but we "related" in a limited way.

Also, the chance to see Jude Law so close comes now, of ALL Times.
He could have decided to go on stage 2 years ago, or 4 years ago or never; but it turns out that now when I am going to see him, we will a progressed Venus-Sun-conjunctions, with is a repetition of the natal Venus-Sun-conjunction, and at that very evening (and I did NOT look into the stars before I booked the tickets) both of us will have an exact transit to our Venus-Sun-midpoint.
My Venus-Sun-midpoint will be transitited by Pluto and his Venus-Sun-midpoint will be opposed by Venus (and my Sun is sitting there,t oo).
And of course there are some progressed Sun-MOon aspects, Sun-moon-midpointsaspects, Venus-Vertex-aspects.
My pr ASC will be exactly conjunct my own Venus and his Sun.

I think, in this particular case those aspects are descriptive of the opportunity I am going to have to see him.
Under "normal" circumstances it could have led to a relationship, maybe.

But as a matter of fact "relating" can mean many things, not only a romantic and sexual relationship.
In this case it can mean that I will see him in an artistic environment (that is Venus,t oo).

posted June 22, 2009 05:22 PM            

his AC square my karma (1)
my AC quincunx his karma (3)

posted June 22, 2009 07:48 PM            

What exactly do you mean by AC double whammies, DD?

If Lara's way works, I have at least one AC double whammy with Crush Guy:
-My Valentine conjunct his AC (1)
-His Valentine trine my AC (2)
-My Groom conjunct his AC (0)
-His Groom square my AC (0)

Ah, yes--just reread. DD wrote:

quote:

---

Double whammies with ASC should be:
1. with planets which rule the 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th or 10th house

2. within a reasonable orb (2° - 3° max.)

3. the connecting planet should fall into the 1st, 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th or 10th house of the other person (at least one way).

---

DD, does it have to be the same planet for each person (as in Mars-AC, AC-Mars)? Do you count all aspects, or just conjunctions/oppositions?