posted September 16, 2012 01:09 PM            

2) How did the house play a role in making the pain expressed differently?

3)Did you feel like you deeply understood each other or was how the pain felt and understood to different because of the way it was expressed through the house?

I had a conjucntion with me ex, aries chiron by 4 degrees...mine in my 7th house his in his 1st...
We had both seen religious ostracism, we had seen brutality and death.
His father was an abortion doctor, practicing late term abortions in the late 80's-early 90's...he crossed picket lines in his front yard just to get in the car and go to school. Regularly was awaken in the middle of the night to go clean the graffiti off his dads clinic after the activist vandalized it...even as a little child! He said he remembered when he was only 12 his father talking about horrible things at the dinner table, like the 12 yr old brought in because the priest, at their church had gotten her pregnant.
If that wasnt bad enough, his father was charged for the murder of his mother after performing an after hours liposuction surgery that went wrong, no one else there to assist in the surgery except the janitor...hmmm?
His 1st house Chiron was a very public pain...his life was always all over the front page of the mid western bible belt town!
you can still look up his dads info...on a site about doctors that murder and get away with it.
I had very painful things but it was all kept very quiet and hidden by religion. I saw the pain in personal ways, lack of love in personal relationships....
In synastry, i would have thought we would really understand each other, but it actually was the reason we broke up! he was very calloused and didnt care what others needed...just him! He could talk about his past with a shrug, it didnt seem his pain was taken very deep inside him...i dont know how, but he said he never cries about it and hasnt in a long time...he misses his mom and still doesnt know if he dad really killed her or it was an accident, he didnt seem to care to find out either. he said its in the past i leave it there.

posted September 18, 2012 03:03 PM            

...I disagree with kids being exposed to adult issues, despite how "mature" some parents may perceive their kids to be. They are kids. They shouldn't have to deal with adult themes.

Since your Chiron is in the 7th, you will feel the pains in partnership more acutely, so the fact that you are even inquiring into this topic of Chiron in relationships is described by your Chiron placement, I'd say! Others might not be so sensitive to it.

Here are brief Chiron house descriptions, from Annie at Cafeastrology:
http://www.cafeastrology.com/articles/chironinhouses.html

"...In the first house, it may indicate a journey of self-discovery. Possibly, there were restrictions in early childhood that will have had the effect on you of either retreating into yourself or having to fight to be noticed. There will be a need to find personal meaning in existence. Some will do this by being overly aggressive, others by withdrawing. Having a job or interest that is really enjoyed will give a positive direction to your life."

Chiron in 7th:

"In the seventh house, it may indicate a feeling of rejection to do with relationships, maybe the parents split-up or were distant with each other. You may marry early and there may be more than one marriage or close relationship. You are quite empathic and even psychic. There is a need for finding a balance between you and your partner - you are not one person. Find your 'self'."

Part of your own Chiron placement may include acceptance of your relationships, just as they are.

And as you've told me, you can't heal things until you are ready. Or, he may never feel compelled to look at it any more deeply. Some people aren't able to really deal with deep childhood trauma until they are in their 50's or later, even.

Chiron was in Aries for several years in the 70's. I don't know that having it conjunct with someone near your age is thought to be significant, but I'm certainly no expert.

Me: Aries Chiron in 4th:

"In the fourth house, it may indicate an insecure early family life, so much so that feelings of abandonment or being the 'black sheep' persist. A lack of self- confidence may make you think doing anything with your life is a waste of time. You probably have a lot of time for other people and have great empathy. Try to bring out the unique you by using this feeling of being 'different'."

...Hello! Pretty true.

My ex-GF: Aries Chiron in 9th:

"In the ninth house, it may indicate some crisis to do with spiritual teaching. A strong belief of one sort or another that must be channeled correctly to give the right balance. Being the eternal student should be enjoyable, not stressful, so take time to relax. You could be a very good teacher, if your extreme opinions are modified."

True. She has jumped headlong into different religions throughout her life, seeking to really imbibe and believe in the particular teachings, to satisfy the transformational needs of that 8th house Pisces sun/moon of hers, perhaps. This has caused her inner agony and discord at times, as of course a lot of traditional religious beliefs don't include same-sex relationships, for one thing. So, it seems to me that the spiritual outlets she seeks often become burdens for her, rather than sources of inspiration. Yet, she really is a good teacher in that area. She really does imbibe, believe in, get a lot from, and genuinely embody the best of what spiritual teachings offer, in my opinion. She is always working on herself, in that way. Yes, it has made me sad, to see her struggling with this. I think maybe her North Node in Sagittarius is helpful to her, however, in eventually seeking her own larger truth in spirituality matters.

posted September 18, 2012 03:53 PM            

quote:

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So my question is, when things like this fall in a house that isnt deeply emotional, is this not going to be felt deeply? Or will it, but this particular guy just has not dealt with it....or maybe not dealing with it why its in the 1st house...if he was going to deal with it in this life his chiron would be in a more personal house...maybe it will be in his next incarnation? What do you think?

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Maybe his "Chiron wound" is something more subtle, and perhaps unrelated to this obviously traumatic story.

For example, my ex-GF described above was chronically abused for most of her childhood by a step-father, along with the mother who has never acknowledged it; and has spent years off-and-on in therapy processing her past.

...That could be considered by most objective observers as the most apparent "wound" in her life, yet seems completely unrelated to the 9th house Chiron theme I described for her, right?

posted September 18, 2012 04:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Jovian:
Maybe his "Chiron wound" is something more subtle, and perhaps unrelated to this obviously traumatic story.

For example, my ex-GF described above was chronically abused for most of her childhood by a step-father, along with the mother who has never acknowledged it; and has spent years off-and-on in therapy processing her past.

...That could be considered by most objective observers as the most apparent "wound" in her life, yet seems completely unrelated to the 9th house Chiron theme I described for her, right?

IDK, just one obvious observation from my own life.

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posted September 18, 2012 04:38 PM            

She has said she feels a sense that she may have been in some sense abusive to others that she had power over in her past; such that at some intellectual level she can appreciate the "reason" she had to go through this.

...Do you sense anything of your ex-BF's trauma in the description of 1st house Chiron?