posted July 21, 2003 06:14 AM         

So, he is now on formula until he goes onto cow's milk at 12 months. He takes this quite well.

Since he has weaned himself, I have been feeling emotional and exhausted. Now, I still feel emotional, but also nauseous, very tired and my breasts are extemely sore. I think my milk has just about dried up. I don't think I am pregnant as I had a test done at the doctor's 2 weeks ago.

Even still, I am thinking I should get another one done, just to be sure.

My periods haven't started yet, so perhaps my body is jsut attempting to get back into balance, after the abrupt change in milk supply.

Any ideas/suggestions would be appreciated.

posted July 21, 2003 10:13 AM         

i havent posted to you yet, directly, so i wanted to say first that i love your name! its so lovely!

that said, heh... it sounds to me almost as though you werent ready to let go, and your body is having like, a phantom pregnancy, kind of like how some very sympathetic men will when their mate is pregnant. perhaps you werent prepared to give up breast feeding just yet, subconsciously, and the fact that your little tiger is asserting his independance is a shock to you and you dont quite know what to do. does this make any sense? i 'feel' as though you might have wanted to 'mother' him more, and might be a little distraught that it seems like he doesnt 'need' you. he does, just not in that way. hes got better things planned.

perhaps your body is telling you two things- that even if your son is independant you can have other children who would depend on your more and need more 'mothering', or to remind you how painful it is to be pregnant lol! i dont know, but the body and the mind are so closely intertwined, and perhaps if you do an affirmation of sorts and accept that this little guy is destined to not need you as much as you might like, and let it go as it were, the symptoms might subside. it sounds like he will be quite the go getter, wow! he just wants to get on with it doesnt he? wait and see special things from this child. i have a feeling he will be very special, but hard to understand.

i hope you feel better soon!

~ana

posted July 21, 2003 12:03 PM         

My heart goes out to you! It is a tough time, no doubt.
I think ana makes some valid points. Something to think about, at least.

From a physical standpoint, beLIEve it or not, your feelings are fairly common. I nursed all my children and weaning was a tough time for me, no matter which one of us initiated it.
When you are nursing, your body produces large amounts of a hormone called OXYTOCIN. This hormone ensures a good, steady supply of milk for the little one. It also inhibits menstruation. That is probably why your periods haven't resumed. Mine took anywhere from 2 to 6 months to return after nursing!
An added benefit for Mom is that oxytocin is a STIMULANT. It is related to endorphins, the 'feel good' chemicals our bodies produce.
When you stop nursing, and the oxytocin levels drop, you can experience a 'crash'. It is very much in the nature of withdrawal from any 'high' inducing substance.
So, anyway, there is a very real physical reason for feeling the way you do!
My best advice is to be kind to yourS-elf. Nap when the little one naps, if you can. Try to add more fruits to your diet. They help your hormones adjust more quickly.
Don't stress over the return of your cycle, it takes a little time.
The sore breasts where always tough for me to handle! Cool compresses can really help!
And my own (really strange but it works) remedy for soreness, Vick's Vaporub. I know that sounds weird, but it not only helps with the soreness, it also helps to dry up the last of your milk and tighten up your breast tissues.

I kNOW you'll be feeling better very soon!
I hope this helped a little bit.

posted July 21, 2003 12:26 PM         

I agree with LoonyFish, (been there, done that, lol) and wanted to add one or two thoughts. Antibiotics unfortunately, while they fight off infection can leave you drained physically. Also, unless you're certain your milk has dried up, it may help to express milk periodically and gradually ease off; it may make the adjustment a little easier for you both physically and emotionally because of the hormone release LoonyFish mentioned. And yes, if there is any chance at all that you could be pregnant again...find out. In the meantime...be gentle with yourself; weaning can be traumatic, especially if it is abrupt. Anafaery had some good advice too. Take care and I hope you're feeling better soon.

posted July 24, 2003 06:21 AM         

Well, I had a blood test done to see whether or not I was pregnant - I'm not!! Phew!! The doctor thinks it is just my hormones balancing out and he has suggested to go back on the normal pill now.

I do feel a bit emotionally better within myself, but I do feel extremely tired and nauseous.

I guess I do feel at a loss as to why my baby decided to wean, but as you guys said he obviously was ready. Thanks Anafaery for your kind comments re my son. How sweet of you. Yes, I do feel he is special too!! But, I am the biased Mum, of course.

Thanks so much for your wonderful support.

posted July 27, 2003 04:42 PM         

A rocking chair is great to rock back and forth with the baby and it's relaxing for both of you.

Also, guys are great for GENTLY massaging sore breasts in order to break up any congestion that might be making them tender.

posted July 27, 2003 06:37 PM         

I am now on the normal pill, and I don't feel so emotional.

Thanks also to Morgana and Randall for your loving thoughts. What special people!!!

posted July 27, 2003 11:37 PM         

im glad.

its hard on mothers because there is so much stress on a mother... theres a lot to live up to, at least by societies standards. so many friends of mine try so hard to be this supermom, and they forget that they are people too and also have needs. my best friend... she drives me nuts.

she bends over backwards for her kids and does all this work at the school, does daycare, her kids really rule her. she NEVER takes time for herself and her own interests, and then complains to me about how she feels. i tell her, geez sandy, you gotta stop being a slave to your kids, to quote shirley valentine 'running around like r2 bleedin d2'. thats exactly what sandy is like. kids say mommy jump shes already in the air.

im glad shes a good mom but if she doesnt take care of her own needs and identity thats all she will be, is a slave to her kids. they will grow up to be spoiled, and she will be haggard and have no identity outside of 'mommy'... surely that cant be the best way to raise kids, for the kids or the mom.

posted July 28, 2003 07:16 AM         

It will get better (and better), Sunmeadow. But who am I to talk when I don't have any kids, right

posted July 31, 2003 06:59 AM         

I have still been feeling very nauseous, but I suppose that will ease soon enough.

Thanks Morgana - my 2 boys are doing really well!!!