Author
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Topic: Lexxi :) ... replying to you about autism (and trauma)
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Snake Lady Knowflake Posts: 197 From: Austin, Texas Registered: Aug 2011
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posted August 26, 2022 01:37 PM
I wanted to continue our talk here in Health and Healing as you suggested. Yes, autism can definitely cause frustrations with communication. From what I understand, there is often a streak of genius in a certain area and extra difficulties in other areas. I know that it's not the same as down syndrome at all. There may also be heightened sensitivities to experiences that don't bother other people. Maybe you can tell me more about it if you feel up to it. I was thinking about your apologizing and explaining yourself, though, and I think that's more related to having experienced long-term narcissistic abuse probably for most of your life (mainly childhood, then carried over into adulthood). This is based on what you told me about your past, of course. Yours is a response that comes from CPTSD, which is a type of PTSD that comes from long-term abuse rather than a sudden, intense moment. With CPTSD, you have emotional flashbacks rather than flashbacks to specific events. Meaning you'll just suddenly feel sad, depressed, scared, guilty, etc. instead of flashing back to a specific event (although this could be included). Also, you'll tend to feel as though everyone is a minefield you have to step around because their reactions affect you so intensely. In any case, you don't ever have to apologize to me for being direct. It takes a lot of energy to have to include apologies and defenses. I do want to learn more about you, so at this point I take your explanations as informational, but I definitely don't require any apologies for your honest opinions. IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 8563 From: Here since March 24th.2005/..& Have been Lexagramming going on 2/3 of a century to date! LEXIGRAMMING.♥is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted August 27, 2022 11:34 PM
quote: Originally posted by Lexxigramer: Excellent post😎❤️ I will start a thread in hearth and home and just copy cut and paste this post there😎❤️ It will stay open here and others can post on it too of they desire to do so😎 I am not a moderator of this forum so cannot move or close threads👽 Maybe I can have some moved to hearth and home by another moderator here⁉️ Well anyhow I shall reply here for the moment a wee bit and then later on the Hearth And Home one😎What you describe sounds almost right on😳 However though I DO get the flashbacks but only to the extremely detailed and extremely specific things😳👽 Never really get any vague just sad or other emotions without the clear memory trigger that a new situation causes the old similar situation to jump forth as if it were brand new emotional state👽😳😢 My memory is too ha we cases contain every detail even smell taste and more details and is totally new not old👽 Oh yes definitely much abuse by super narcissistic and control freak people and also physically abusive people😢🤬 The mental emotional head game players were in many ways the worse ones😢🤬 I do not know whether I told you about my heroin addict ex and his creepy things he did to smash my self esteem to death😢🤬 Mother, stepmother and even other kids and teachers, yes teachers, treating me as if I were retarded and a freak because of various physical deformaties and restrictions and having a beard and mustache at 9 years old mixed with puberty brought on by medical intervention at sound age 8, because they were making sure I matured as a girl and not an intersexual person👽😢🤬 My mother took DES when pregnant with me so as with many children exposed to that prevent the miscarriage drugs back then, I was left with genital deformaties and required surgery to fix me😢🤬 On the other hand I was indeed a girl and over 30 pregnancies confirmed my ability to get pregnant and prove being female, just not a perfect one, hence losing all but one pregnancy👽😢 So yeah more than one reason for my psychological issues and PTSD and such👽 Okay going to wait and post more at the new thread and here perhaps too⁉️ My mind and body are a bit over exhausted at the moment so talk with you later dear Snake Lady❤️ I do love your user name❤️😎 It sounds mystical and gentle but powerful too😎❤️ Sweet dreams to you my dear friend💤💤💤[/B]
PS I think I mentioned this before but not sure👽 I was put in what was known as the retarded class because of how I looked and the uncontrollable stuttering that hit me hard after a brutal rape at age 9👽😢 Then a few years later a new teacher came and they tested me and discovered to their utter shock that not only was I not retarded But was the person with the highest IQ in the corner of the state😎😎😎 High as Einstein which was 180 😎 A which is far above low genius of 135 and averages of 90 to that👽 But my self esteem was so crushed by being abused and then stuck with the retard label by the school system; Well I never got over it and then married a man who made sure that my self esteem stayed crushed so that he could control me👽😢🤬 Ok rant over again 👽 Good night and sweet dreams dear Snake Lady💤❤️Pardon any typos or weird autofills as usual👽 IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 8563 From: Here since March 24th.2005/..& Have been Lexagramming going on 2/3 of a century to date! LEXIGRAMMING.♥is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted August 28, 2022 12:08 AM
I started a thread here for us at Hearth And Home😎❤️ http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum32/HTML/000659.html I hope it was okay that I did a copy cut and paste quotes for our two posts above here😎❤️ If not I can fix it😎 Oh yeah about the constant apologizing issue😢👽 My beloved husband of over 25 ,years to date❤️ Is still trying to break me of that problem/habit👽❤️
He reminds me that I am not with my ex or the many abusers and to stop always apologizing when I have not done anything wrong👽 I apologize for some of the weirdest things👽 Shall explain more later on the Hearth And Home thread and here too a copy of it😎 This is a good thread here others can also reply on about autism and its relationship to trauma and Multiple types and number of the times of such things that had happened👽 There I go again a rambling 😅 Good night again dear Snake Lady❤️ IP: Logged |
Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 8563 From: Here since March 24th.2005/..& Have been Lexagramming going on 2/3 of a century to date! LEXIGRAMMING.♥is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted August 28, 2022 11:07 AM
Grrrs many typos and strange autofills in my posts again👽 I shall try and fix ASAP as it makes some things sound off or weird and not right and stupid grrrrs Far above genius IQ but being both visually and physically impaired my eyes cannot see well and or I get moments of blindness and or partial blindness depending on which nerves are acting up from the Demyinating Polyneuropathy and my hands go numb, and I have never been able to type with more than one finger hunt and peck due to my severely arthritic hands and the motion of bringing hands together as on a keyboard is impossible for me because my neck, arms,and back of my head go numb from various cervical stenosis and endplate Spondylitis and disc degenerations and more nasty syndromes👽 So yeah I make many many typos and it can make me appear stupid because unfortunately being a genius does not fix my eyesight and neurological diseases👽 Before the cancers hit I did my best to fix all errors and eliminate strange autofills as I typed and checked immediately for such aberations and fixed them on the fly, but now am too often worn out from just my first drafts and so I post and do not always fix right off. This is not an actual apology but an explanation as to my reasons for so having so many typos left in my posts since the cancers hit.Oh yeah Autism is definitely not Down's Syndrome.😎 I suppose there are folks with both but am not sure about that👽 As far as being a genius in one area but not in other areas a good example is this: My husband describes me as going from Einstein to Elmo to Rain Main and back to Einstein😎 The dyslexia gets involved and then stuttering and then I just try and become invisible and start rocking and go blank until my brains return and I stop flapping my arms like a rabid raven👽 Yeah I am an idiot in some areas but a genius in others. That can make me appear retarded even though I am actually a high genius of at least 180 IQ😳 I shall move these posts replies to the new thread at HEARTH And HOME ASAP 😎 Rough night trying to get myself moving more and clear head up and struggling with overpowering nausea from the chemothetapy😢
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Lexxigramer Moderator Posts: 8563 From: Here since March 24th.2005/..& Have been Lexagramming going on 2/3 of a century to date! LEXIGRAMMING.♥is my Passion! Registered: Feb 2012
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posted August 28, 2022 11:55 AM
I do want to reply to specific points in your first post here on this thread😎So please feel free to ask ANY questions you have concerning all of this😎 It may help others to heal and understand folks who are thusly affected by either being the afflicted person or by being the parent, partner. and or caregiver of the afflicted to all cope better❤️ IP: Logged | |