posted June 07, 2014 02:15 PM            

In the beginning of our relationship I was very skeptical with him, because I was aware of this aspect and that it could all be a little bit "too good to be true". It also felt a little bit too perfect between us, and to this day we have still never had a single fight, or anything that is just close to that.

Now we have soon been together for 1 year, so I was wondering when this aspect is beginning to show itself? Could it take years? And the more time that will pass, is the illusion going to be bigger and bigger?

Another of our strongest aspect is Venus Square uranus(I'm uranus) at 0'18, and our relationship certainly started very randomly, and we have had a lot of time "away" from each other, because of travels and studies. But also, this has never been a problem, because we both wait at each other.

posted June 07, 2014 06:25 PM            

Sun - Neptune, imo, is seeing what you want to see and letting everything else slide. In the sense that, you are so caught up in the "magical connection" that pick and choose u can let the other person get away with things you normally wouldn't put up with, and in turn you can hide your true self cause you know if you show your true self the other person wouldn't like it.

So in essence, both people put up the behavior they believe will keep the "magical connection" alive. A man does something that his wife/gf/etc doesn't like, and she says "It's okay, I'll take care of it myself". A woman does something her bf/husband/etc normally wouldn't put up with "That's fine, I love her so much".

Essentially both people keep putting up their best "neptunian" behavior forward. They avoid confronting the other over things that bother them. They avoid having any kind of conflict whatsoever, cause being "real" will spoil the "magical connection" they believe they have Until one day the illusion gets so big that one or both can't maintain it. Now, reality sets in, and it's time to talk about those difficult topics we had avoided all this time. You won't let the person get away with things as easily anymore, and both parties won't be afraid to confront the other. Hence, you always hear people say in reference to neptune, "When I finally saw him/her for what they really were....", or "When I finally started confronting him/her about his behavior...."

In other words, to me, to know when the "neptune time limit" is almost up, so to speak, is when you aren't afraid to confront them about things you normally wouldn't put up with, to talk about serious issues that could very well make both of you separate, etc.

There isn't a "how long till you feel (blank) - neptune in synastry", but rather, "how to know when neptune's power isn't as strong anymore".

Venus - uranus doesn't have to mean unstability. It could simply mean exciting, exhilarating, something different from what you're used to, etc. There is no illusion here.

How things play out aren't always set in stone, in the sense the outer planet will always be the one doing x, and the inner y. Sometimes it can switch back and forth.

The first step to overcoming synastry aspects is knowing what they are, and how they can present themselves. Still, knowing what they are doesn't mean you can know how to overcome them. So ask yourself this,

posted June 08, 2014 04:21 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SoujiroSeta:
I don't think there is a time limit.

Sun - Neptune, imo, is seeing what you want to see and letting everything else slide. In the sense that, you are so caught up in the "magical connection" that pick and choose u can let the other person get away with things you normally wouldn't put up with, and in turn you can hide your true self cause you know if you show your true self the other person wouldn't like it.

So in essence, both people put up the behavior they believe will keep the "magical connection" alive. A man does something that his wife/gf/etc doesn't like, and she says "It's okay, I'll take care of it myself". A woman does something her bf/husband/etc normally wouldn't put up with "That's fine, I love her so much".

Essentially both people keep putting up their best "neptunian" behavior forward. They avoid confronting the other over things that bother them. They avoid having any kind of conflict whatsoever, cause being "real" will spoil the "magical connection" they believe they have Until one day the illusion gets so big that one or both can't maintain it. Now, reality sets in, and it's time to talk about those difficult topics we had avoided all this time. You won't let the person get away with things as easily anymore, and both parties won't be afraid to confront the other. Hence, you always hear people say in reference to neptune, "When I finally saw him/her for what they really were....", or "When I finally started confronting him/her about his behavior...."

In other words, to me, to know when the "neptune time limit" is almost up, so to speak, is when you aren't afraid to confront them about things you normally wouldn't put up with, to talk about serious issues that could very well make both of you separate, etc.

There isn't a "how long till you feel (blank) - neptune in synastry", but rather, "how to know when neptune's power isn't as strong anymore".

Venus - uranus doesn't have to mean unstability. It could simply mean exciting, exhilarating, something different from what you're used to, etc. There is no illusion here.

How things play out aren't always set in stone, in the sense the outer planet will always be the one doing x, and the inner y. Sometimes it can switch back and forth.

The first step to overcoming synastry aspects is knowing what they are, and how they can present themselves. Still, knowing what they are doesn't mean you can know how to overcome them. So ask yourself this,

Do you let your bf off the hook one too many times?
Are you afraid to confront him about things you want to talk about, but don't because you don't want to "ruin" things?

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Thanks for your answer, it's really what I was looking for!

Maybe I have been very overbearing with him a couple of times, but it hasn't been major issues in my eyes… But I have to add that we also have a lot of saturn going on, both sun-saturn double whammy (sun square saturn and sun trine saturn) and venus square saturn…so from the start I was thinking that I didn't wanted to be "strict" towards him, and I have tried really much to avoid that and be a "yes" person rather than a "no" person….
But I was not aware that this could be neptune and not saturn, making me this overbearing!:P

But it's not that I am afraid to confront him… I have done that a couple of times, and each time he said exactly what I needed to hear, so it was never really a problem in the first place!
I don't know if he feels the same way though… he has mars in 12th house and is libra dominant, so he could easily be "hiding" some frustrations that he isn't telling me about…

But this "overbearing" behavior, is that really such a problem?:P I just thought it was also just being out of love from the other person:P Ofc it depends on what it is about, but in my book we just haven't had major issues yet:S

posted June 08, 2014 12:13 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
But I have to add that we also have a lot of saturn going on, both sun-saturn double whammy (sun square saturn and sun trine saturn) and venus square saturn…so from the start [b]I was thinking that I didn't wanted to be "strict" towards him, and I have tried really much to avoid that and be a "yes" person rather than a "no" person….
But I was not aware that this could be neptune and not saturn, making me this overbearing!:P

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quote:

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But it's not that I am afraid to confront him… I have done that a couple of times, and each time he said exactly what I needed to hear

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Those 2 bolded statements right there, to me, are both neptunian in nature. Saturn is what makes you overbearing. It's the part of you that wants to scold/teach him when he does something you don't like. Neptune makes you accepting of anything they do regardless of how much you really don't like it at times.

Saturn wanted you to address his behavior, but the neptune made you more of a "yes" person rather than a "no", cause neptune didn't want reality to set in.

You have confronted him, but he has said exactly what you wanted to hear, cause, once again, neptune wants to keep the dream alive. Maybe what you wanted hear was exactly what he wanted to say, but what I'm trying to point out is how neptune will make someone very accepting so that the fog doesn't clear.

He might have wanted to say something else, just like how you wanted to be a bit more strict with him, but you both decided to let it slide. Which is neptune's territory.

quote:

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I don't know if he feels the same way though… he has mars in 12th house and is libra dominant, so he could easily be "hiding" some frustrations that he isn't telling me about…

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I have a libra moon and cancer sun/mercury/mars so I definitely know a thing or 2 about wanting to keep the peace, but I've noticed that synastry can affect how I act towards people.

So yes, he might want to keep the peace, but the neptune contact(s) could make him want to keep the peace even more than he might usually have.

quote:

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But this "overbearing" behavior, is that really such a problem?:P I just thought it was also just being out of love from the other person:P Ofc it depends on what it is about, but in my book we just haven't had major issues yet:S

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Wanting things resolved doesn't make you overbearing. You shouldn't be afraid to be real with someone. I guess it's the pluto/sag in me speaking, but if you can't be real with someone, sooner or later you will have to. It's just by then you might have kids in the equation, joint finances, married, etc and then when the realness comes out a separation will be more costly.

I would personally advise you not to be scared to be yourself. People scold saturn/pluto for relationship problems, but imo, the number killer is neptune. People get to know each other while being on their best behavior (honeymoon phase), and then they wonder why problems arise later on when the fog clears.

posted June 08, 2014 04:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SoujiroSeta:
No prob, i'll help in whatever way I can

Wanting things resolved doesn't make you overbearing. You shouldn't be afraid to be real with someone. I guess it's the pluto/sag in me speaking, but if you can't be real with someone, sooner or later you will have to. It's just by then you might have kids in the equation, joint finances, married, etc and then when the realness comes out a separation will be more costly.

I would personally advise you not to be scared to be yourself. People scold saturn/pluto for relationship problems, but imo, the number killer is neptune. People get to know each other while being on their best behavior (honeymoon phase), and then they wonder why problems arise later on when the fog clears.

If you want address his behavior, go ahead. Always stay true to yourself. Your true self will come out sooner or later.

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I don't want you to misunderstand something, but I certainly don't feel like I'm not "myself" around him… I might be a "better" and more "happy" version of myself towards him, but I feel more like it's just how we are together and he is a happy person in general that is also affecting me in the "good" way!
I have even said this to him… I've actually told him that I feel more happy around him than I usually am… I don't think he really got it though, but I also try to be very honest with him, and not hiding anything… the only thing I'm "hiding" from him is me being into astrology lol:P And nope, I don't have plans telling him that!

But I will certainly take your advice with me, and not holding anything back if I feel like there is something… but then again - I've also learned from past relationship that it is a good idea for me to "think twice" before I react on something, because otherwise I could easily misinterpret something and bring a lot of trouble that is unnecessary?

posted June 09, 2014 03:31 AM            

Ya know, I don't believe there's any one synastry aspect that is grounds for ending a relationship. Some people might have a few horror stories but that doesn't mean that every synastry with certain hard aspects are going to manifest the most negative side of them.

Hard aspects are challenging (and can indicate conflict), but they are also dynamic, and bring change and excitement. Another thing that hard aspects do is make things more dramatic and exaggerated. With Neptune trine Sun we might feel a gentle flow of compassion and caring towards another. With the square these feelings would be even more dramatic, and what's more hard aspects tend to inspire us to DO things, and push our energy forward. You'd feel a deep need to express your Neptune toward the Sun person in a much more dramatic way then is usual for you. You'd be emotional about the Sun person, and want to sooth them in a way. Hard Neptune aspects can also refer to people going into a private 'dream bubble' together quite willingly, and are not always about some type of horrible deception (although this can happen when this aspect manifests in it's most negative form). It is best if other parts of the synastry allow you to snap out of the 'dream bubble' occasionally and deal with the realities of life. With Saturn also involved in the synastry this should be more then possible.

posted June 09, 2014 05:41 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lotis White:
Hi Next To Neptune,

Ya know, I don't believe there's any one synastry aspect that is grounds for ending a relationship. Some people might have a few horror stories but that doesn't mean that every synastry with certain hard aspects are going to manifest the most negative side of them.

Hard aspects are challenging (and can indicate conflict), but they are also dynamic, and bring change and excitement. Another thing that hard aspects do is make things more dramatic and exaggerated. With Neptune trine Sun we might feel a gentle flow of compassion and caring towards another. With the square these feelings would be even more dramatic, and what's more hard aspects tend to inspire us to DO things, and push our energy forward. You'd feel a deep need to express your Neptune toward the Sun person in a much more dramatic way then is usual for you. You'd be emotional about the Sun person, and want to sooth them in a way. Hard Neptune aspects can also refer to people going into a private 'dream bubble' together quite willingly, and are not always about some type of horrible deception (although this can happen when this aspect manifests in it's most negative form). It is best if other parts of the synastry allow you to snap out of the 'dream bubble' occasionally and deal with the realities of life. With Saturn also involved in the synastry this should be more then possible.

I tend to think that synastries with a mixture of hard and soft aspect are best. With perhaps a emphasis on the soft ones and a few hard ones thrown in there. Ha, I once tried to find a perfect synastry for me in the ephemeris and there was no such thing! (if we go buy an no hard aspect rule)

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Well I do think we have our own dream bubble, but I also consider that comforting, relaxing and nice that we are able to "dream" a little in our own world…
we have a lot more challenging aspects than good ones though (below 4 degrees)
Our close challenging aspects are
sun square saturn,
sun square neptune,
sun square jupiter
moon opposition venus,
mars square ascendant
moon square ascendant,
mercury square neptune,
ascendant opposition saturn,
ascendant opposition uranus
uranus square venus…

Our close "good" aspects are only
sun conjunction mercury double whammy,
mars trine mercury,
pluto trine moon,
ascendant trine moon,
pluto trine ascendant,
venus conjunction mars,
mars sextile jupiter
venus sextile uranus
venus trine ascendant