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Author
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Topic: constant fighting
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mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 04:02 PM
  
these two people fight constantly. i keep thinking they've got to break up soon. but they still keep going.
their fights are volatile, and at times border on physical. they seem to not like eachother at all.what is making them stay together?
what is making them fight?
do you think they will continue into the future like this?  IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 04:56 PM
updated chart with some asteroids...
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hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 09:24 PM
Please post the composite too!  IP: Logged |
Lonake
Knowflake Posts: 9742
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 29, 2014 09:27 PM
Whoever the blue person is here, they're gonna have a tough time with anyone.Looks like they both have nVenus sq Neptune so they can be pretty forgiving on one hand, deluded on the other, thinking things will improve "someday" or not seeing things for how they are. And their Neptunes trine the blue persons sun in tenacious taurus, so they idealize the energy of staying the course. Lol,hmm they're both due for their Saturn returns, which will opp blues moon/mars. There could be a break there. IP: Logged |
starmoon
Knowflake Posts: 1465
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 29, 2014 09:31 PM
the synastry shows little in the way of emotional connection between these two people. it's not good for long-term. they both have good, strong individual placements which probably makes them not-so-good partners. they both have an alpha chart by the looks of it, so probably each one needs a 'weaker' partner, one with some planets that won't challenge their own. it looks like there are two people wanting to be the boss hereIP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 10:18 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Please post the composite too!
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mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 10:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lonake:
Whoever the blue person is here, they're gonna have a tough time with anyone.Looks like they both have nVenus sq Neptune so they can be pretty forgiving on one hand, deluded on the other, thinking things will improve "someday" or not seeing things for how they are. And their Neptunes trine the blue persons sun in tenacious taurus, so they idealize the energy of staying the course. Lol,hmm they're both due for their Saturn returns, which will opp blues moon/mars. There could be a break there.
Haha, yes the blue person is stubborn as h*ll and many people just don't understand him, and i think he likes it that way. he has few friends, but they are loyal and too be honest, super mutable, as well as understanding of his nature. he is very gifted musically. he has strong values but also a devil on one shoulder that he doesn't like to admit is there. Yes, the venus square neptune is interesting. they obviously forgive, but it is so short lived. i've known couples who fight regularly, but this is next level. bickering constantly, a least one big fight a day and a major fight where they say they ''break up'' or throw a glass at the wall or yell with fists waving in the air….the type of stuff that would embarrass a person. they definitely idealize….in general….both venusian ruled, so their looks and image and important and they are attached to the ''aesthetics" of their relationship. though they dislike each other…ha. definitely a steak of vanity in the red, woman. i had just remembered it was saturn's return for them. i am truly curious as to how it will unfold...
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mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 10:48 PM
quote:
Originally posted by starmoon:
it looks like there are two people wanting to be the boss here
haha, couldn't be truer.
yes, emotionally they are distant, unless they keep any affection/warmth totally private, but i'm pretty sure it's non-existent. blue keeps a lot of himself hidden from her, red likes to control but is also pretty detached emotionally. blue has a bad temper. red pokes at it constantly. money is a big issue for them. blue doesn't care to make a lot. red wants more. IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 10:49 PM
Look at that Mars conjunct sun in the house of communication opposing mercury and forming a tsquare with pluto..but then look at how Pluto the focal point of the tsquare forms a love kite with moon, Venus and neptune!! Beautiful. Thanks for posting.IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 10:56 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Look at that Mars conjunct sun in the house of communication opposing mercury and forming a tsquare with pluto..but then look at how Pluto the focal point of the tsquare forms a love kite with moon, Venus and neptune!! Beautiful. Thanks for posting.
It is a cool looking composite! i don't know too much about how tsquares and kites play out. But i'm guessing you see something good here? Perhaps that venusian ideal, neptunian illusion, that was mentioned above is at work with the kite? they want to keep that beauty? IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 11:03 PM
I want to add that the relationships that make me feel strong emotions and that I care about losing and want to protect and hold unto in spite of the challenges involve tsquares in composite...it's impossible to feel neutral about these people..in some cases it can turn into a sort of love hate thing but the truth is you love them passionately and don't want to lose them...they evoke strong emotions in you. You always end up forgiving these people..there is a strong connection.IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 11:06 PM
quote:
Originally posted by mareaire:
It is a cool looking composite! i don't know too much about how tsquares and kites play out. But i'm guessing you see something good here? Perhaps that venusian ideal, neptunian illusion, that was mentioned above is at work with the kite? they want to keep that beauty?
I am thinking there make ups are just as epic as their fights with those two astrological patterns linked like that. IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 11:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
I am thinking there make ups are just as epic as their fights with those two astrological patterns linked like that.
at one point that might have been the case, but i know that the make-ups aren't so epic these days, according to blue. a very prominent detachment of heart from red. which is why i'm really thinking this can't go on. IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2014 11:56 PM
quote:
Originally posted by mareaire:
at one point that might have been the case, but i know that the make-ups aren't so epic these days, according to blue. a very prominent detachment of heart from red. which is why i'm really thinking this can't go on.
Perhaps they are going through some rough transits and if they overcome the challenges will be stronger for it or it could be the beginning of the end... You can post each natal with transits perhaps some people can point out some things... Are their current progress to natal or progress to progress aspects happening? IP: Logged |
LeeLoo2014
Moderator Posts: 7381
From: Venus cornering Neptune
Registered: Mar 2014
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posted October 30, 2014 09:18 AM
It's a pretty strong synastry.------------------
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms... IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 30, 2014 03:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
It's a pretty strong synastry.
what stands out as strong to you? and strong in what way? IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 30, 2014 04:55 PM
Ohh yes Leeloo please share...I personally really like the juno-pluto conjunction and juno-venus conjunction, the venus trine mars-moon and venus trine moon DW, the mars trine mars-moon, the venus on the MC and the house/angles overlays between the 1st and the 7th and 10th and 4th. The pluto conjunct Sun. I hope they work it out and start fresh....strong relationships can overcome periods of crisis that appear to be leading to the end but then a rebirth occurs; I am hoping for them anyways. I like their synastry and composite. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 58006
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 30, 2014 05:00 PM
When you think fights, you think Mars. Perhaps, it is the Mars oppose Saturn. I just had a fast look and did not read the whole thread, so that was just a fast thought.------------------
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mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 30, 2014 05:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
I personally really like the juno-pluto conjunction and juno-venus conjunction, the venus trine mars-moon and venus trine moon DW, the mars trine mars-moon, the venus on the MC and the house/angles overlays between the 1st and the 7th and 10th and 4th. The pluto conjunct Sun.
yes, those are some good things, and no doubt what the relationship was originally founded on. i consider juno quite important here, as they are in a marriage like relationship. with pluto there though, unless they transform the relationship, it will end, but leave them transformed. that's sweet that you are rooting for them. honestly, i don't know what i'm rooting for, as i've been friends with both of them for a long time and i'm just getting sick of hearing about it all. for years. part of me thinks it would be easier for them to actually go separate ways instead of the constant fighting. also, since i think that red totally doesn't care about the heart connection and depth of relationship, and only is concerned with how it looks to friends, family and community, it's hard for me to feel like it's worth blue's while to stick it out. i'm not taking sides, just calling it like it is. IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted October 30, 2014 05:29 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
When you think fights, you think Mars. Perhaps, it is the Mars oppose Saturn. I just had a fast look and did not read the whole thread, so that was just a fast thought.
ah, yes. this is huge. here's a desciption from cafe astrology. it is spot on.
At the beginning of the relationship, Saturn is often unfettered by Mars' energy, and may even find it attractive. With time, Saturn becomes annoyed with Mars' seeming lack of discipline and "childishness". How Saturn handles this will be very important. Unfortunately, very often the Saturn native uses subtle ways to undermine the Mars native's confidence. Saturn attempts to control Mars by limiting, blocking, and undermining Mars. Mars feels like he or she is always in the wrong in Saturn's eyes. When Mars laughs naturally and freely, Saturn stares at Mars with a superior look, as if Mars is being foolish. Saturn may criticize Mars for everything from the way Mars dresses to how he or she behaves with others. Saturn perceives Mars as over-confident and frivolous, gets annoyed at the drop of a hat, and lets Mars know, either with direct criticism or a general air of disapproval. For a while, Mars tries to win back Saturn's favor. After all, the very traits that Saturn seemed to love about Mars at the beginning of the relationship have turned into things to criticize. The nature of Mars is rather aggressive, however, so this period will likely be short-lived. Mars will then become angry at Saturn for all of Saturn's overly-serious behavior and disapproval. Mars may rebel and flaunt themselves before Saturn, which in turn makes Saturn feel all the more need to inhibit and restrict Mars. Can you see where this is going? The relationship has turned into living hell. Any latent aggressive tendencies in either individual become larger than life. At the very least, verbal abusiveness can result. Physical aggression is sometimes the next step if these discordant energies get out of hand. Eventually, Mars will want to leave, which can anger Saturn even more. These aspects require special handling, and both parties should be growth-oriented in order to manage the discordant energies. IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted November 03, 2014 03:27 PM
just an update on this…they had a huge fight (go figure) and it truly seemed like it was the end (but of course it never is)….blue got to say his piece though, he never really does, while red tells the whole community her sob story, constantly. i think that's what is so annoying about this whole situation is that she includes other people in their sh*t. i am connected to them not only as friends but in a professional manner and it's difficult to escape their drama. i have essentially cut myself off of red because she is the one who draws me in or attempts to. the culmination of their fight happened in a room full of 6 people plus 4 children. i am going to post transit chart for them and their composite. also a synastry chart between red and myself to see why she latched on and tries to drag me in…. IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted November 03, 2014 04:47 PM
okay, here is red's chart and transits:  IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted November 03, 2014 04:49 PM
transits for blue…
 IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 594
From: Miami
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted November 03, 2014 07:31 PM
Looks like they are both dealing with a Saturn return! That can be tough on a relationship and result in many fights.Saturn will be in scorpio again in July 2015 at 29 degrees... If they make it through this is possible that they will be stronger and learn from it once the influence wanes off and saturn leaves scorpio to not return as right now it seems they are just reacting... This guy is stubbbbbbbbbbbbbbornnnnnn. Look at that triple taurus, plus jupiter, saturn and AC also in fixed signs and then mercury and venus in aries. This guy probably never admits his wrong and thinks his right always and is my way or the high way type. She is more laid back but her words probably sting more and she is more argumentative. I am thinking he is stubborn and thinks he is always right which rubs her the wrong way and leads to arguments for which she does not shy away from and she can say things that sting and escalate matters. ???? AM I CLOSE? *I do feel for you though; its not fair at all the position she is putting you in and that they are dragging the whole community into their problems... It seems they are forming a triangulation with you which is a sign of dysfunction; they need to work their stuff out one on one and be as private about it as possible; if they need to bring a third party in then it needs to be professional but I think is best they both do individual therapy first separately but still using a systemic approach.... IP: Logged |
mareaire
Knowflake Posts: 225
From: avalon
Registered: Feb 2014
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posted November 03, 2014 09:06 PM
yes, it's deep saturn return time for them, and i'm really quite unsure if they will come out alive.he is very stubborn as you say. the chart spells it right out. he is however, quite complacent, and chill (until provoked) and doesn't concern with what others (i.e.. red) do….his stubbornness relates only to his own personal choices…..which infuriates red. he has no previous history of getting angry. she is nitpicky and controlling. i would not say she is laid back. she is neurotic and very cerebral and needs/wants to talk about everything all the time. blue is not much for conversation, he loves silence. so, you get her talking at him about his choices and how she wants him to be different (can't change a bull) and then all of sudden red bull (our little nickname) comes out with major anger. and then she tells everyone how bad she has it because he yells (and has threw a cup *at* her) , etc. it's hard to find sympathy for her because when you see it go down, you're like, wow, this girl is clearly annoying him. wow, how relentless, and how crazy that she is oblivious to him not enjoying this right now….still going on….SNAP. she just pushes over and over again. says she will leave him if he doesn't change. when he finally mans up and says, fine, don't let the door hit you on the way out, she comes back crying saying she loves/needs him. she turns a lot of people against him which is not right in my books…if you don't want to be with someone the way the are, then move on.
anyways, the other night when they had their scene here at my house with everyone, my partner told them that they really need to deal with this on their own. i'm not the only person pulled in, there are several very significantly so, and they engage it and ultimately make it worse.
we are all connected professionally, i don't think we'll see then end of this anytime soon. what do you mean by triangulation? astrologically speaking, or just as in a three person dynamic? i wish i could get a composite with transits ….? anyone know who to pull that up on astro?
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Looks like they are both dealing with a Saturn return! That can be tough on a relationship and result in many fights.Saturn will be in scorpio again in July 2015 at 29 degrees... If they make it through this is possible that they will be stronger and learn from it once the influence wanes off and saturn leaves scorpio to not return as right now it seems they are just reacting... This guy is stubbbbbbbbbbbbbbornnnnnn. Look at that triple taurus, plus jupiter, saturn and AC also in fixed signs and then mercury and venus in aries. This guy probably never admits his wrong and thinks his right always and is my way or the high way type. She is more laid back but her words probably sting more and she is more argumentative. I am thinking he is stubborn and thinks he is always right which rubs her the wrong way and leads to arguments for which she does not shy away from and she can say things that sting and escalate matters. ???? AM I CLOSE? *I do feel for you though; its not fair at all the position she is putting you in and that they are dragging the whole community into their problems... It seems they are forming a triangulation with you which is a sign of dysfunction; they need to work their stuff out one on one and be as private about it as possible; if they need to bring a third party in then it needs to be professional but I think is best they both do individual therapy first separately but still using a systemic approach....
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