posted July 30, 2015 09:06 PM
HER:She almost always had her long hair back (hairclips, braids, and even stylish scrunchies that didn't look 80s), earrings (usually simple but pretty hoops), a little makeup tastefully applied, very respectable clothes (typically a dress, very feminine, I recall tasteful plaid and argyle being common with plenty of stripes and polka dots and even gingham wasn't unknown, but no bright reds, blacks, or even whites save maybe as a splash, she usually wore subdued colors, it seems dark blues and blue grays were preferred), loafers or slip-ons and even Mary Janes.
The school we went to had a very strict dress code (and yet the principal wasn't satisfied as he was pushing for school uniforms, perhaps the one thing we both could've bonded over if the subject had come up) so I don't know if that's how she looked outside of school. My look was different so hers may have been as well. (We did run into each other a couple times out of school but the only time I got a good look at her was when she was with her mom at the mall and she may have dressed a bit differently because of her mother being present...we said nothing to each other then.)
She seemed to be "proper" (for want of a better word) and she didn't cringe, she was quite expressive as I was and seemed confident in who she was for the most part (and unlike most girls she confronted me directly rather than being passive aggressive). She didn't appear to be at all athletic (not that I'd call her overweight), however (wouldn't surprise me if she tried out for cheerleading since cheerleaders got special privileges--but about as hated as they were popular--but if she did she didn't make it).
ME:
There just wasn't a lot of money for clothes. Basically I wore what Granny got me or I got from thrift stores (which were much cheaper back then), or even what I could get from friends. Jeans (typically the regular kind but I also had black) with regular but almost generic shirt (but oversized, very loose and often reaching down to my thighs) were common, no makeup or jewelry, my hair was boyishly short, I did like arm wraps (usually striped, my favorite was gray & blue or black & green, but I had other kinds and also other styles) and would wear a functional (rather than stylish) brown or black belt which was sometimes necessary to keep my pants on. I did have some black capris along with dark green cargo pants (both a bit large for me) but they were what was available. I usually wore dark colored or gray socks (harder to tell when I got them dirty that way, or if I did then at least no one cared) and regular tennis shoes. It wasn't exactly grunge but it was close (though if my jeans frayed or got ripped I'd pass them off as grunge and I also had some flannel shirts which I'd sometimes wear over my oversized shirts), maybe one could call it hodgepodge. 
Outside of school I'd sometimes wear beanies (had a gray one and one that was a striped bright red, yellow, and orange, both were given to me) and more often wore a bandana (I had multiple colors) to help keep my hair out of my face (it was against school rules to wear anything like that in school so I didn't there, and one reason why I don't know if the other girl liked to wear anything on her head outside of school). I also had some really cheap rings (some with spikes on them) and might wear gloves (better to cushion my hands when I fell off my board). I did have some muscle shirts & striped crop tops (good in the summer!) but I wasn't allowed to wear those in school (when I did wear them I often wore my striped arm wraps, especially if skating because they helped protect my forearms from getting scraped).
I also liked drawing on my clothes but that wasn't allowed in school either (and got sent home over it).
Us next to each other in class:
Like her I was expressive and didn't seem to care what others thought but I was much more casual in my walk and talk, and even the way we sat at our desks was different (her with legs together, arms in front of her, possibly leaning forward, but I move around when I felt like it and wasn't shy about stretching my limbs).
She also mocked my accent which was pretty strong. Gods, we were terrible, she'd mock me for being from the sticks and insinuate insulting things over it and I'd say there's a lot more to it like horseback riding, swimming and fishing on my family's farm, and...as I pantomimed aiming a shotgun at her....using stuck-up ******* for target practice...the class loved us sniping at each other (I think I only called her a ***** once since I got sent to the office for it), I treated it as a game (with an annoying opponent) but she was serious about it.
I think we both made very good grades...perhaps she studied more than I did and took offense that I was allowed to read in class AND that I still made As for the most part. I believe she wouldn't have cared so much if my grades were worse than hers (and yes, she DID look over at my papers when they were handed back and after awhile, especially after she commented on something, I even made a production of showing her by holding it toward her with both hands, possibly announcing my grade and any comments and asking what she got, the class thought that was funny).
Mostly she hated my friend (actually all my friends who were all boys that year save one, and she hated her in particular) who really was promiscuous and assumed I was as well, and hated my look, my "thrashing" (though she mockingly agreed I "looked thrashed"), and my supposed having sex with any boy I could which she figured was why I took up "boy stuff" because no girl would have anything to do with me save one whom she also hated ('course that becoming targets probably had more to do with it, or they'd feel intimidated by my crowd--this year was very unusual for me to only be close to one girl, but the vicious girl world did play a part in why that was so).
Of course the boys in my crowd did get girlfriends and they were almost never friendly to me, and a few were downright nasty in their jealousy, and when one friend of mine kicked her to the curb because he couldn't stand her being so clingy, distrusting, and telling him he couldn't have anything to do with me the girls naturally assumed he and I were having sex (we weren't) rather than we'd been friends for years who both had to endure alcoholic 'rents and shared a love of fantasy fiction (he was also into skateboarding though he lost his board and didn't try very hard to replace it) and his house was like a 5 minute walk from where I lived. And this girl born the same day as me sitting next to me determined to show her contempt (and try to get others to do so) also believed that I was letting him bang me and was of the school of thought that males and females couldn't have anything in common besides sex/romance no matter the similar interests and home life we shared.
To her I was a failure as a girl, a hick from the sticks, and a threat to every girl in a serious relationship as I might seduce her guy, especially when I was "with the boys" without the girls (because why else would I be with them?). I got the impression that she felt I was a bad example that deserved punishment lest other girls follow my example, or lest boys think they could get away with having sex with me while having girlfriends, that is she wasn't trying to bully me so much as prosecute me somehow. (To my knowledge she didn't give anyone else a hard time, but then I knew almost nothing of her outside that class.)
(She herself had a virginal presentation, though I don't know how accurate that actually was. But even the girls who were openly sexual--though they might limit themselves in some way such as oral--were typically monogamists or at least serial monogamists and still looked down on me and my BFF whom they assumed were having orgies or something...even my BFF who was promiscuous wasn't as wild as she was portrayed. As for me I was more curious than offended by the habits of my BFF and she also had an abusive alcoholic dad and when she moved almost next door to me I was glad to finally know a girl who didn't shun me, though she was shunned by the other girls our age just as I was.)
But when I left class I pretty much forgot her. She wasn't as important to me as I was to her. Perhaps my having some serious problems at home and the like made her and the high school drama seem insignificant in comparison, I don't know.
But she loathed me, and after it came out that we shared the same birthday we were asked where we were born and both of us knew the hospital, which was the same, and the one who asked that then asked me if I'd stolen her pacifier back then given how much she hated me (and did so instantly) which had the class laughing. (No one thought I hated her, but perhaps disdainful would've been accurate. But if she wanted to push me around I was more than willing to push back, even if the teacher favored her over me but once class was over then she was dismissed by me as much as the class itself.)
I don't hold it against her today but as I put more stock in astrology I wondered why this was so and I fairly recently managed to find her and have a friend make contact and slowly get her birth data (I helped in analyzing her chart, though she doesn't know that, at least not that it was me specifically) because I've always wanted to know her ASC to see why she hated me practically on sight. I still haven't made contact as I don't see a point though we might get along today now that both of us are (presumably) more mature and less impulsive.
And I'm curious how astrology would explain this, and apparently just how big a difference even the ASC can make in the chart. (Of course maybe we were just raised in such a different environment that our "potential" was shaped differently, and combine that with Sag energies and both of us being born the Year of the Dog then maybe being so alike inside while shaped differently on the out made our sniping at each other inevitable.)
Lindaland
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posted July 30, 2015 08:34 PM
