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Author
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Topic: The HARSH realities of synastry charts...
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NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 11:19 AM
  
Can synastry charts be responsible for love triangles between friends?For example, lets say you have a "not-so-great" synastry chart with a significant other, but they have a "GREAT" synastry chart with one of your best friends Is it possible that your significant other may actually leave/cheat on you with your friend because their chart has more action going on? Any experiences with this? Does synastry run THAT deep? IP: Logged |
Nine
Moderator Posts: 2579
From: The Cusp of Love
Registered: May 2009
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posted January 16, 2016 11:50 AM
If it happens in real life, it's possible.This is one of the reasons I back away from looking at certain charts...drives me crazy with what if scenarios. IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 12:03 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Nine:
If it happens in real life, it's possible.This is one of the reasons I back away from looking at certain charts...drives me crazy with what if scenarios.
I agree. I've seen people go crazy over comparing charts with others, which leads to assumptions. I've never seen it to be THAT serious though. Have you been in real life situations regarding this? IP: Logged |
Nine
Moderator Posts: 2579
From: The Cusp of Love
Registered: May 2009
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posted January 16, 2016 01:11 PM
I guess it depends on what aspects make up "good synastry". The closest I came to that was with two siblings. I noticed the older one first and was very attracted, but meh, they weren't feeling me. The younger one (didn't know they were related at the time) came out of nowhere and gave me flattering attention. It was cute, but I wasn't about to date someone in HS. All of us would hangout, but the older one would always leave. I played nice, but on the inside my heart always sank. Three years on my pMoon moved to conj the older one's nSun and it was on. We had a thing. Coincidentally, while the younger one was overseas for the Summer. Upon returning the older invited the younger to hang with us, within five minutes they left pouty without looking me in the face. IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 01:17 PM
So im guessing the answer is "it depends". The situations at hand and anything else going on can activate or deactivate the connection.When I see a big group of friends, I know that there has to be a strong synastry link between them. Its impossible for a big group of male/female friends that know and are involved with each other to not share it with some of the other friends. But at the same time, I know it doesn't necessarily mean that something shady is going to happen behind closed doors. Maybe those strong attractive aspects can be translated into something else in a platonic way.. IP: Logged |
Orange
Knowflake Posts: 4516
From: Georgia
Registered: May 2009
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posted January 16, 2016 01:35 PM
I always run synastries of the object of my affection and ppl around us. If i see a passionate synastry, the person presence is limited to a minimum and very controlled. It doesnt matter if the person is attractive or not. I even issued a ban on my Aries man on talking more than a few minutes to a 64 years old female because I was sure she was flirting with my young thang, and when I checked the synastry, her Venus-Mars conjunction was tightly opposed my guy's Pluto. That was it for me. IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 01:47 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Orange:
I always run synastries of the object of my affection and ppl around us. If i see a passionate synastry, the person presence is limited to a minimum and very controlled. It doesnt matter if the person is attractive or not. I even issued a ban on my Aries man on talking more than a few minutes to a 64 years old female because I was sure she was flirting with my young thang, and when I checked the synastry, her Venus-Mars conjunction was tightly opposed my guy's Pluto. That was it for me.
Thats a terrible way to live though. No offense to you. But why would you want to put a leash on someone you love? If they are truly faithful then you would have nothing to worry about. Im not trying to offend you, but I just don't understand why go through all of the trouble by worrying yourself with these synastry chart comparisons. What if one of his closest friends shared amazing synastry with you?? Better than the one you have with your bf? How would you then react to it? IP: Logged |
fiola
Knowflake Posts: 58
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 02:36 PM
I'm usually too lazy to do that, even if i did i wouldn't give it much thought. His ex on the other hand, i would keep an eye on, to see if there's still something lingering or if he has a stronger bond with her.. IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 02:58 PM
quote:
Originally posted by fiola:
I'm usually too lazy to do that, even if i did i wouldn't give it much thought. His ex on the other hand, i would keep an eye on, to see if there's still something lingering or if he has a stronger bond with her..
Have you experienced this the other way around? IP: Logged |
Lotis White
Moderator Posts: 2164
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 16, 2016 03:25 PM
Well in judging if your partner could be attracted to one of your friends, there's two different things to take into consideration.There's the interplanetary synastry that causes physical attraction... Venus/Mars, Sun/Moon, Mars/Moon, Pluto/Venus or Mars, and Uranus/Venus, and so on. However, these aspects can remain platonic for the most part if the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses of your partner aren't highly activated by the other person's chart in general. This is done through house ruler synastry, planetary overlays, and also symbolism matches (one person has Uranus in the 7th, and the other has an Aquarius Moon). Without the relationship houses involved in synastry (5th, 7th, and 8th) attraction interplanetary aspects may result one person thinking the other is good looking, but they won't fall in love with them. It would be like looking at a pretty picture. They can admire it but don't necessarily want to buy it. The 5th, 7th, and 8th houses, show the three different types of personality we are attracted to in others. They show the combination of energies that makes up our 'type'. If someone is not our 'type' we won't fall for them even if we think they are good looking in general as a member of the opposite sex. So basically all interplanetary synastry can show is if we think the other person is physically attractive in general or not. It can't really show if someone is our 'type' personality wise. As mentioned before, the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses show our psychological type. If a person has a planet conjunct our 5th house ruler, and their Moon is in our 7th house, they are likely to have a personality type that attracts us. However, if they have the personality type that we go for but they don't share physical attraction interplanetary aspects with us, we would still only like them in a platonic way. This is because the energy exchange needed for basic physical attraction is not there. To summerise, two major things need to happen for a person to be really attracted to someone else. 1. The interplanetary synastry needed for physical attraction needs to be there. 2. The other needs to activate the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses (preferably all three in one way or another) of the person in question, so that they have the right personality type to attract them. If both these factors are present in synastry it's likely that a strong romantic attraction will develop. If one factor is present but the other is missing, a strong and lasting attraction is not likely to develop. There might be only fleeting crush that fades to nothing after a short period. If neither factor is present then nothing to worry about at all. One thing to keep in mind is that even if your partner is attracted to one of your friends to some extent, nothing may still happen if your partner is loyal and values the relationship that the two of you share. Even so, I still might be a bit nervous about my partner associating too much with someone who fits both of these factors in his chart. IP: Logged |
fiola
Knowflake Posts: 58
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 03:31 PM
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Have you experienced this the other way around?
As in me having a better synastry with someone else ? if so i would keep it in mind just in case.. but not actually break up with my current boyfriend to be with someone i'm more compatible with astrologically.
It's my personal belief that astrology is not here to show us if a person is better with us than someone else, but simply to help up understand better our dynamic, relationship, fated events... etc.IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 03:35 PM
Thanks Lotis for the explanation. Has definitely cleared things up for me in a way. I find synastry to be troubling sometimes because we look at all of these aspects and expect this to be this and that to be that. When in actuality nothing really happens.When you say house rulers, you mean the planet associated with the house right? So if someones 5th house was in Gemini, what would it mean if Mercury fell on someone's MC/10th house? IP: Logged |
Cappi112
Knowflake Posts: 595
From: New York, New York, USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted January 16, 2016 03:38 PM
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Can synastry charts be responsible for love triangles between friends?For example, lets say you have a "not-so-great" synastry chart with a significant other, but they have a "GREAT" synastry chart with one of your best friends Is it possible that your significant other may actually leave/cheat on you with your friend because their chart has more action going on? Any experiences with this? Does synastry run THAT deep?
It is only possible in the sense that ANYTHING can be possible - not because a synastry chart indicates it. I've been a firm believer for years that Synastry charts manifest in our relationships in totally different ways from how they may be interpreted. For instance, I have harsh Mars- Saturn square in synastry with my boyfriend, but I see where it plays out in our relationship, and it actually keeps me honest and on my toes in this relationship. Prior to him I was commitment-phobic and bailed on most relationships (I also was younger and not ready). Now, when we have a rough patch, I am always forced to see where I am dropping the ball and pick it up. But another person with this aspect would find it way too difficult, and would be more attracted to their friend with whom they have only gentle, flowing saturn energy to their venus and mars. For me, no one is more interesting, attractive, or worthy of my love than my man. But that's just how this aspect impacts ME. This is why I urge most people to take synastry and compare it with their natals - see where it is filling in the gaps in your OWN natal chart, and how the relationship uniquely balances you, and where it may be a little tougher to handle. Then decide if it is 'good' or 'bad' for you. But even then, remember, synastry doesn't CONTROL the outcome, it is just mirroring energies and potentials you are dealing with already with that person. IP: Logged |
Cappi112
Knowflake Posts: 595
From: New York, New York, USA
Registered: May 2015
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posted January 16, 2016 03:40 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Orange:
I always run synastries of the object of my affection and ppl around us. If i see a passionate synastry, the person presence is limited to a minimum and very controlled. It doesnt matter if the person is attractive or not. I even issued a ban on my Aries man on talking more than a few minutes to a 64 years old female because I was sure she was flirting with my young thang, and when I checked the synastry, her Venus-Mars conjunction was tightly opposed my guy's Pluto. That was it for me.
Whaaat... this seems a little extreme, orange. WHo's to say your SO would ever be unfaithful to you? There's no point in trying to control someone so close to you, especially just because of a chart. If I noticed my SO flirting with someone he's close friends with all the time, I suppose that would be one thing, but even then... it's not in my control how he interacts with others. IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 03:40 PM
quote:
Originally posted by fiola:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by NYCdodger:
[b] Have you experienced this the other way around?
As in me having a better synastry with someone else ? if so i would keep it in mind just in case.. but not actually break up with my current boyfriend to be with someone i'm more compatible with astrologically.
It's my personal belief that astrology is not here to show us if a person is better with us than someone else, but simply to help up understand better our dynamic, relationship, fated events... etc.[/B][/QUOTE]I agree. Like I said, I find it impossible to not have powerful synastry connections with someone else regardless if you are in a relationship or not. And if it is in a large group of friends, its bound to happen even more IP: Logged |
Lotis White
Moderator Posts: 2164
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 16, 2016 04:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Thanks Lotis for the explanation. Has definitely cleared things up for me in a way. I find synastry to be troubling sometimes because we look at all of these aspects and expect this to be this and that to be that. When in actuality nothing really happens.When you say house rulers, you mean the planet associated with the house right? So if someones 5th house was in Gemini, what would it mean if Mercury fell on someone's MC/10th house?
Yes, that's what I mean by house rulers. So if you have Gemini on the 5th, 7th, or 8th cusp you'd look at see how your partner aspects your Mercury. If they strongly aspect your Mercury with their Sun, Moon, Venus or Mars it can really attract you to them. Or if your partner's own 5th, 7th, or 8th house ruler, were to aspect your Mercury this would connect the two of you in special way. Like if they have Capricorn on the 7th, and you have Gemini on the 7th, and then the two of you have a Saturn/Mercury conjunction in synastry (7th house rulers conjunct), this can oddly feel like a really sweet connection even though it's the planets Mercury and Saturn involved. The 7th house part of the aspect adds to it a Venus flavor. IP: Logged |
fiola
Knowflake Posts: 58
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 04:19 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Cappi112:
It is only possible in the sense that ANYTHING can be possible - not because a synastry chart indicates it.I've been a firm believer for years that Synastry charts manifest in our relationships in totally different ways from how they may be interpreted. For instance, I have harsh Mars- Saturn square in synastry with my boyfriend, but I see where it plays out in our relationship, and it actually keeps me honest and on my toes in this relationship. Prior to him I was commitment-phobic and bailed on most relationships (I also was younger and not ready). Now, when we have a rough patch, I am always forced to see where I am dropping the ball and pick it up. But another person with this aspect would find it way too difficult, and would be more attracted to their friend with whom they have only gentle, flowing saturn energy to their venus and mars. For me, no one is more interesting, attractive, or worthy of my love than my man. But that's just how this aspect impacts ME. This is why I urge most people to take synastry and compare it with their natals - see where it is filling in the gaps in your OWN natal chart, and how the relationship uniquely balances you, and where it may be a little tougher to handle. Then decide if it is 'good' or 'bad' for you. But even then, remember, synastry doesn't CONTROL the outcome, it is just mirroring energies and potentials you are dealing with already with that person.
I'm curious though, what would make us more prone (aspects and such in the natal) to react positively to a conventionally negative planet/aspect ? IP: Logged |
NYCdodger
Knowflake Posts: 2040
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 04:49 PM
^^^ This actually happens a lot. Some people are drawn to hard aspects and some are repulsed by the softer ones. I believe there are deeper things in astrology than just angles, houses and planets. Maybe a Mars square Saturn is exactly what that person needs...IP: Logged |
fiola
Knowflake Posts: 58
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 16, 2016 07:02 PM
Exactly ! i found asteroids helping to a certain extent, since only very tight orbs apply, but it'd be great to know what works and why, as in general rules about the behavior of planets according to their dignity and aspects, and how it would affect the house its ruling.IP: Logged |
Lotis White
Moderator Posts: 2164
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 16, 2016 08:08 PM
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
^^^ This actually happens a lot. Some people are drawn to hard aspects and some are repulsed by the softer ones. I believe there are deeper things in astrology than just angles, houses and planets. Maybe a Mars square Saturn is exactly what that person needs...
This is totally true. Some people are actually attracted to a large number hard aspects in synastry, while others are more attracted to a large number of softer aspects in synastry. It depends on the person and their own natal chart. Also this can be planet specific. For instance, the same person could be fond of hard aspects to Venus, but have a difficult time with hard aspects to their Moon. Each planet in our chart will have it's own level of tolerance for hard vs soft aspects. I liked Cappi112's story about the Mars/Saturn hard aspect actually working out good for her. There are those that might think that such an aspect in synastry is the worst thing in the world. But in reality the experience of these so called terrible aspects varies from person to person. Some actually benefit from them, while others can't stand it. It depends on what we need as an individual, and how our own unique chart is set up. IP: Logged |
LaceyLeigh
Knowflake Posts: 724
From: New Jersey
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted May 07, 2016 09:49 PM
Bump. Really good thread.I feel a bit embarrassed about doing this. I definitely feel a twinge of jealousy when someone I like has better synastry with a friend/relative/acquaintance/ of mine. Like Venus/Mars double whammy, an abundance of Pluto aspects, Venus/Mars in composite/Davison, conjunctions to the ascendant. Nice Moon/Moon aspects, Uranus aspects, etc. Gaaah, drives me crazy. IP: Logged |
comdoc
Knowflake Posts: 437
From: Tucson
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted May 07, 2016 11:26 PM
My 5H ruler Sag29 Jupiter, 7H co-rulers Gem23 Uranus + Leo20 Saturn, 8H ruler Libra11 Neptune. According to this theory, I should look for Sun, Venus, Mercury?, Moon, Mars aspecting these.Sun Mercury max sep is 28d; Sun Venus max 48d. Mercury can only be in sign before, same, after Sun. Venus can be 1 or 2 signs before, same sign, 1 or 2 signs after Sun. I eliminate 1 sign before or after due to my planets all in Fire and Air signs. Gem Sun+Merc+Venus
Leo Sun+Merc+Venus This is my fave. 8/17/87 and 8/3/92
Libra Sun+Merc+Venus
Sag Libra Sun+Merc+Venus Gem Merc + Late Gem Sun + early Leo Venus
Leo Merc + Late Leo Sun + early Libra Venus
Libra Merc + Late Libra Sun + early Sag Venus I'm Aries25 Sun Aries10 Merc Gem10 Venus Gem30 Moon Leo20 Mars Leo23 rising strongly attracted to
Leo or Libra Moon, and
Aries, Leo, Aquarius rising. quote:
Originally posted by Lotis White:
Well in judging if your partner could be attracted to one of your friends, there's two different things to take into consideration.There's the interplanetary synastry that causes physical attraction... Venus/Mars, Sun/Moon, Mars/Moon, Pluto/Venus or Mars, and Uranus/Venus, and so on. However, these aspects can remain platonic for the most part if the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses of your partner aren't highly activated by the other person's chart in general. This is done through house ruler synastry, planetary overlays, and also symbolism matches (one person has Uranus in the 7th, and the other has an Aquarius Moon). Without the relationship houses involved in synastry (5th, 7th, and 8th) attraction interplanetary aspects may result one person thinking the other is good looking, but they won't fall in love with them. It would be like looking at a pretty picture. They can admire it but don't necessarily want to buy it. The 5th, 7th, and 8th houses, show the three different types of personality we are attracted to in others. They show the combination of energies that makes up our 'type'. If someone is not our 'type' we won't fall for them even if we think they are good looking in general as a member of the opposite sex. So basically all interplanetary synastry can show is if we think the other person is physically attractive in general or not. It can't really show if someone is our 'type' personality wise. As mentioned before, the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses show our psychological type. If a person has a planet conjunct our 5th house ruler, and their Moon is in our 7th house, they are likely to have a personality type that attracts us. However, if they have the personality type that we go for but they don't share physical attraction interplanetary aspects with us, we would still only like them in a platonic way. This is because the energy exchange needed for basic physical attraction is not there. To summarize, two major things need to happen for a person to be really attracted to someone else. 1. The interplanetary synastry needed for physical attraction needs to be there. 2. The other needs to activate the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses (preferably all three in one way or another) of the person in question, so that they have the right personality type to attract them. If both these factors are present in synastry it's likely that a strong romantic attraction will develop. If one factor is present but the other is missing, a strong and lasting attraction is not likely to develop. There might be only fleeting crush that fades to nothing after a short period. If neither factor is present then nothing to worry about at all. One thing to keep in mind is that even if your partner is attracted to one of your friends to some extent, nothing may still happen if your partner is loyal and values the relationship that the two of you share. Even so, I still might be a bit nervous about my partner associating too much with someone who fits both of these factors in his chart.
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