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Author
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Topic: I don't understand Pluto/Venus-can you help me understand it?
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ScorpieScorp
Knowflake Posts: 859
From: USA
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 29, 2017 02:22 PM
  
Hi,I am having a hard time understanding Pluto/Venus synastry. I completely get Pluto/Moon as I have that aspect Natal and have had it in a very significant relationship. Pluto/Moon is so beautiful and the most agonizing when you can't be with the person (it was DW, but his Pluto was EXACT on my Moon, oh man...) But lately I have seen I have a lot of Pluto/Venus with a lot people around me (mostly people around the same years of birth). With the Pluto/Moon relationship, I did have my Pluto Quintile his Venus at about 1orb...but I think the Pluto/Moon DW is what I felt the most. We also have Pluto Sextile Mars... What is the purpose of this aspect? I read it is Pluto who wants to rework the person's Venus. It is extreme love. It is obsession on the part of the Pluto and infatuation on the part of Venus. But really happens to Pluto? What does it want with Venus? What does Venus want with Pluto? Why is this aspect considered Karmic? Are there things you should do so that the relationship is not doomed? For instance, should Venus just give in to Pluto and and make it happy? Should Pluto take is slowly with Venus? Why is there obsession? And when you say obsession, what do you really mean? In real concrete reality is what I want to understand... IP: Logged |
CapriciousCapricorn
Knowflake Posts: 976
From:
Registered: Sep 2015
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posted January 29, 2017 07:45 PM
I see Pluto Venus square as typical jealousy issue, sometimes even without real reason for jealousy. With this aspect logic and common sense are absent. It's so selfish. But I am not the one to comment because it's just how I imagine it to be, I have not experienced it myself.How was it being a Pluto in Moon Pluto conjunction?  Did he enjoy it as much as you did? Who's the poor lamb? IP: Logged |
ScorpieScorp
Knowflake Posts: 859
From: USA
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted January 30, 2017 12:00 PM
quote:
Originally posted by CapriciousCapricorn:
I see Pluto Venus square as typical jealousy issue, sometimes even without real reason for jealousy. With this aspect logic and common sense are absent. It's so selfish. But I am not the one to comment because it's just how I imagine it to be, I have not experienced it myself.How was it being a Pluto in Moon Pluto conjunction? Did he enjoy it as much as you did? Who's the poor lamb?
Well I was the Pluto in an Opposition. It was a wide orb. He had Pluto exact on me. All I know is, I couldn't shake this relationship for the LONGEST time. I am now finally moving on, and yet, he haunts me almost monthly. Some song, or thing will remind me. It's just the reminders don't take as much of an impact as before. Mind you, its been YEARS since we last talked...PLuto Moon is definitely a very strong aspect. IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 793
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015
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posted January 31, 2017 01:33 AM
Venus square pluto is something I have had with and on\off relation with a guy for the past year. Jelousy is something he showed a lot of in the beginning of things but has since mellowed out on. He didn't want to be anything to me but wanted me to be everything for him is how I felt. I saw a video on that it makes two people think the other is trying to take something or take advantage of the other. Thats insane, all I wanted was for him to respect me and I wanted to be more to him , wanted him to date me and be is girlfriend. I wanted to be with him at one point but then realized he doesn't care for me like that. He is not like he was in the begining as far as being mean like he was but he is very distant and doesn't really speak about feelings or being anything more. I just come to the conclusion he is not going to feel that way toward me or he would act that way in his pursuits and I guess ashamed of me in some sense because he doesn't seem much on taking me anywhere or me meeting anyone he knows. It is the ugliest I have ever felt, like I wasn't good enough or worth it. It doesn't matter I guess, just hope he's happy with whoever he decides is worthy of his affections.IP: Logged |
meyray
Knowflake Posts: 684
From:
Registered: Oct 2012
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posted January 31, 2017 09:12 AM
@colorful butterfly, did you also have any Saturn aspects in synastry? (sorry for going off-topic, ScorpieScorp)IP: Logged |
outofideas
Knowflake Posts: 340
From:
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted January 31, 2017 03:15 PM
Pluto square Venus most often shows that you don't have compatible love natures. And so in trying to create a love relationship you may sometimes use subtle 'games' to manipulate the other person. Light power struggles, jealous and possessive tendencies may become a theme in order to stick with each other. It usually doesn't work long term, but you'll have to consider everything, of course.One way to deal with it (especially if Pluto is prominent and also makes a few other aspects) would be to not feel possessive of one another or threatened that if you don't play the Pluto games your relationship will be over. Just enjoy it for what it is without allowing suspicion and fear rule your relationship. IP: Logged |
yungang_grotto
Knowflake Posts: 4055
From: love lives forever
Registered: Mar 2014
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posted January 31, 2017 03:53 PM
Oh colorful butterfly you are not ugly! You are a beautiful colorful butterfly... your spirit and heart make you so! May you feel beautiful and loved on every level!!I feel really defensive of people's emotional well being right now ♡♡ I'm sorry to hear about that. Venus/Pluto square can create that feeling of extreme imbalance where one person or both, alternating, pull out all the stops in terms of power games, etc. in order to possess or detain control. This can easily translate into a willingness to make the other person totally broken just to keep them at your mercy... good to remember that this is all due to a deep insecurity or need for control which is borne of fear of death/aloneness/etc (a fear, at any rate, which is allayed most easily and most often by a kind of emotional/social vampirism)... It is so familiar to me what you say... their wanting you to be everything to them and their being willing to be nothing to you... that's a power game, it's borne out of the need for control and it can be quite cruel. Everybody wants the upper hand and they are not thinking about the other person's real feelings. There can be such extreme devotion and depth of feeling with this aspect so it's hard for the person being controlled to let go also. Actually both people usually feel strong compulsion in these relationships it seems, but it manifests differently. I have been there anyway... and I know that deciding that he simply doesn't want you/is embarrassed by you/you aren't good enough or whatever is only the smallest part of the picture and it really doesn't boil down to that. you can re-balance this kind of situation by claiming back your autonomy in the situation. Affirm the reasons you DON'T want him (cruelty, insecurity, control dynamics, etc). Remember how worth it you are. Pluto Venus does seem to boil down to lessons of self worth.. on the deepest levels. Amazing empowerment can be found through this heartache. And you are wonderful.
IP: Logged |
CapriciousCapricorn
Knowflake Posts: 976
From:
Registered: Sep 2015
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posted January 31, 2017 07:35 PM
colorful butterfly,this guy, what's wrong with him? Did you tell him you're Colourful Butterfly, nothing less than that? Maybe he doesn't know? smh meeen, their eyes always open wide when it's too late. Their loss IP: Logged |
yungang_grotto
Knowflake Posts: 4055
From: love lives forever
Registered: Mar 2014
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posted January 31, 2017 08:36 PM
^^^IP: Logged |
Elysia
Knowflake Posts: 2572
From: Gotham
Registered: Aug 2015
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posted January 31, 2017 10:09 PM
quote:
Originally posted by colorful butterfly:
It is the ugliest I have ever felt, like I wasn't good enough or worth it.
 
That feels horrible.
It's REALLY not you, it's him. And his hang-ups - because of which he cannot see you for who you are. Some people can look at a diamond and still see a coal. They're poorer for it, not the diamond. IP: Logged |
tessacha
Knowflake Posts: 46
From:
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted February 01, 2017 04:22 AM
What about Pluto conjunct venus? IP: Logged |
ScorpieScorp
Knowflake Posts: 859
From: USA
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted February 01, 2017 11:51 AM
I guess to further explain what I'm asking, I'm really trying to understand the psychology behind this aspect.Why and how does the Pluto act this way? What about Venus does he want? and vice versa... IP: Logged |
Elysia
Knowflake Posts: 2572
From: Gotham
Registered: Aug 2015
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posted February 01, 2017 12:48 PM
Okay.. The way I've seen it - Pluto enjoys having Venus *completely* besotted with him/her, while giving no inclination of how Pluto himself/herself feels. The minute Venus bestows any, even the most innocuous of these attentions on someone else - Pluto's ears prick up. This must be stomped out. That's when the mind games begin. Pluto may not like to admit it, but is also very much *in love* with Venus. Venus' charms are soothing balm to Pluto's tortured soul. She brings her sweet affections and attention and shines her soft light on his darkness. And he doesn't feel so alone and unloved anymore. It's like Beauty and the Beast. Belle sees past the "fearsome" nature of the Beast and falls in love with him for his true self. His rages and control-freakyness in the beginning are classic Pluto. Pluto may think he wants the power - but the motivation is deeper than that. What Pluto is really afraid of, even more than losing "power", is losing the one true connection he ever had. The hardest Pluto lesson - is when he decides to let her *go* (to see her father). True love does bring her back to him. But reaching that level of love & faith is not easy. Venus can be Pluto's redemption, and vice-versa - but only *if* they're willing to surrender to fate. Surrender to the experience. Venus might seem like she goes along with everything, but she has her own agenda too - which must be let go for the greater good of love. Venusian teasing and seducing will only get her so far. In order to truly relate to another person on a deeper level, she too has to submit to the Plutonian "transformation" that awaits them both. ----------------------------------------------------------------
Who plays Venus & who plays Pluto depends on the natals and the inter-aspects. Also about how aware each is of their own Pluto. You cannot wield a power you cannot handle. IP: Logged |
tessacha
Knowflake Posts: 46
From:
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted February 02, 2017 03:01 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Elysia:
Okay.. The way I've seen it - Pluto enjoys having Venus *completely* besotted with him/her, while giving no inclination of how Pluto himself/herself feels. The minute Venus bestows any, even the most innocuous of these attentions on someone else - Pluto's ears prick up. This must be stomped out. That's when the mind games begin. Pluto may not like to admit it, but is also very much *in love* with Venus. Venus' charms are soothing balm to Pluto's tortured soul. She brings her sweet affections and attention and shines her soft light on his darkness. And he doesn't feel so alone and unloved anymore. It's like Beauty and the Beast. Belle sees past the "fearsome" nature of the Beast and falls in love with him for his true self. His rages and control-freakyness in the beginning are classic Pluto. Pluto may think he wants the power - but the motivation is deeper than that. What Pluto is really afraid of, even more than losing "power", is losing the one true connection he ever had. The hardest Pluto lesson - is when he decides to let her *go* (to see her father). True love does bring her back to him. But reaching that level of love & faith is not easy. Venus can be Pluto's redemption, and vice-versa - but only *if* they're willing to surrender to fate. Surrender to the experience. Venus might seem like she goes along with everything, but she has her own agenda too - which must be let go for the greater good of love. Venusian teasing and seducing will only get her so far. In order to truly relate to another person on a deeper level, she too has to submit to the Plutonian "transformation" that awaits them both.
You worded this so beautifully.
Me and the guy I am seeing both have Scorpio in Sun, Venus and Pluto natally .... IP: Logged |
ScorpieScorp
Knowflake Posts: 859
From: USA
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted February 03, 2017 11:37 PM
Yes agreed, very well explained!IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 793
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015
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posted February 04, 2017 08:28 AM
quote:
Originally posted by meyray:
[b]@colorful butterfly, did you also have any Saturn aspects in synastry? (sorry for going off-topic, ScorpieScorp)[/B]
His saturn conjunct my mars. We also had pluto/moon aspects with my pluto on his moon. His pluto is on my ascendant(what I read is like stockhold syndrome for the ascendant person) IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 793
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015
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posted February 04, 2017 09:42 AM
quote:
Originally posted by yungang_grotto:
Oh colorful butterfly you are not ugly! You are a beautiful colorful butterfly... your spirit and heart make you so! May you feel beautiful and loved on every level!!I feel really defensive of people's emotional well being right now ♡♡ I'm sorry to hear about that. Venus/Pluto square can create that feeling of extreme imbalance where one person or both, alternating, pull out all the stops in terms of power games, etc. in order to possess or detain control. This can easily translate into a willingness to make the other person totally broken just to keep them at your mercy... good to remember that this is all due to a deep insecurity or need for control which is borne of fear of death/aloneness/etc (a fear, at any rate, which is allayed most easily and most often by a kind of emotional/social vampirism)... It is so familiar to me what you say... their wanting you to be everything to them and their being willing to be nothing to you... that's a power game, it's borne out of the need for control and it can be quite cruel. Everybody wants the upper hand and they are not thinking about the other person's real feelings. There can be such extreme devotion and depth of feeling with this aspect so it's hard for the person being controlled to let go also. Actually both people usually feel strong compulsion in these relationships it seems, but it manifests differently. I have been there anyway... and I know that deciding that he simply doesn't want you/is embarrassed by you/you aren't good enough or whatever is only the smallest part of the picture and it really doesn't boil down to that. you can re-balance this kind of situation by claiming back your autonomy in the situation. Affirm the reasons you DON'T want him (cruelty, insecurity, control dynamics, etc). Remember how worth it you are. Pluto Venus does seem to boil down to lessons of self worth.. on the deepest levels. Amazing empowerment can be found through this heartache. And you are wonderful.
Thank you!!! I know and I do my best to hold my head high and relize it belongs to him and not me. My progressed ascendant is nearing Scorpio so I imagine this type of dynamic is what pushes it there. Over the last fee years I have learned to forgive, forgetting is the hard part. I am more compassiinate (something made him that way like something made me who I am) than I use to be but at the same time still have my own values and self worth. He doesn't say things like he use to but it is not what it should be. I do see the dynamic of when we are together, it is peaceful and works well but being apart , ughhhh!!! Distant, which os fine, I don't care to argue and content to find someone who values me for me etc. It leaves me weary of who I let close to me anymore, everyone has a dark side. Thank you again, I really appreciate the encouragement and support!!!! IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 793
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015
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posted February 04, 2017 09:50 AM
quote:
Originally posted by CapriciousCapricorn:
colorful butterfly,this guy, what's wrong with him? Did you tell him you're Colourful Butterfly, nothing less than that? Maybe he doesn't know? smh meeen, their eyes always open wide when it's too late. Their loss
lol, yep thats how things go but It'll be alright. Just picking myself up, dusting off and moving on. I care for him, I'm sure in ways he cares for me but it's all very difficult for me. I had told him before, I wasn't wanting a superficial anything but a mind body amd soul connection. Funny, I met another guy with venus in Scoripio , which I smiled when I saw that but he isn't wanting something more than a no expectations type of arrangement. For now , I have decided it best to get to know him and spend time with him and see where things go from there. He is very nice, compassiinate and passionate, very funny. Just best to take my time and see. IP: Logged |
colorful butterfly
Knowflake Posts: 793
From: Durham north carolina usa
Registered: May 2015
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posted February 04, 2017 09:53 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Elysia:
That feels horrible.
It's REALLY not you, it's him. And his hang-ups - because of which he cannot see you for who you are. Some people can look at a diamond and still see a coal. They're poorer for it, not the diamond.
Thank you!!! It'll be ok, wverything hapens for a reason even though I may not see it now. He wasn't all bad but still, things really hurt. I wish him well though, I don't want yo harbor hate in my heart and hopefully karama will come back to me in that way. IP: Logged |
Elysia
Knowflake Posts: 2572
From: Gotham
Registered: Aug 2015
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posted February 04, 2017 12:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by tessacha:
You worded this so beautifully.
Me and the guy I am seeing both have Scorpio in Sun, Venus and Pluto natally ....
Thank you, tessacha & ScorpieScorp! IP: Logged |
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