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Author Topic:   @Jazabel
TaurusVenusGirl
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From: Heavens Above
Registered: Aug 2016

posted December 10, 2018 02:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm inside


My heart has healed, I thought when it did, and I cant believe it did, that the love would go away with it too, but it didn't.

My experience with him is what got me into astrology, I needed to know exactly how he felt about me. I have examined our synasrty forever and as much as I could.

I feel like I just spoke to him yesterday. If he called me now, it was like no time would have passed.

All that's left now is my unconditional love for him

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Jazabel
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posted December 10, 2018 09:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I see...thanks for posting this. What happened, why it didnt work? Was he not available?
I dont see much in the synastry other than the work of his Neptune conjunct your Moon, this is a very tender and sublime aspect, touching of the soul aspect. And the other big thing is that his luminaries are both conjuncting your angles, His Moon is on your IC, his Sun on your DSC. Almost like him plugging his Sun and Moon into your outlet and running his energy through the cords straight into your blood stream.
But I can't see much going on in the rest of the synastry.
I am glad to hear your heart has healed.

How did you experience his natal Moon- Neptune square?

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 10, 2018 01:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The things you mentioned is what I felt. He's neptune conjunct my moon and our psyches conjunct there as well. Amazing feeling. And all thoses telepathic conjunctions in 12H too.

Which makes me feel like I'm still talking to him everyday.

Never noticed the moon square neptune though so cannot really comment on that.

And I think because he had a bad relationship with his mother, he would have soaked up my moon love to his Neptune too.

Also sun conjunction, we just got each other and Sun conjunct mercury, the mental connection was strong which he would of loved with his moon in Aquarius.

And our Plutos in each other's 11H, we were best friends too.

He's married. It's why we are not together. I don't think he was expecting to fall for me so hard either. If he ever splits from his wife, I know I'll be one of the first to know.

His moon conjunct my juno too. I wanna marry him.

He also made me wanna have his babies and live a domestic life with him. Moon in my 4H. Generally that idea repulse me, but not with him.

And yeah those conjunctions on my angles! At least I got my Venus on his Dsc! He thought/said I was so beautiful. He looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

And mars conjunct mars!! Oh man! the sex was spiritually transforming too.

Vertex conjunct Venus. I remember him as my lover from so many past lifetimes.

He feels like a dream.

I saw my soul staring back at me when I looked into his eyes.

Posting this was like ripping scabs from a wound. I spent the night crying over him again. The pain of not being with him is so raw and strong again. But whenever I feel like I've moved on, he comes and pulls me back in again.

I had it all with him. Best friends, tender and passionate love at the same time, spiritual, mental and emotional connection. It was all there and ran both ways.

No one could possibly tell me it was one sided regardless of what the synastry or composite said. He felt it too. As deeply as I did too.

He is my soulmate.

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Jazabel
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posted December 10, 2018 01:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is so deep ...maybe it is a good thing you kind of opened the flood gate now a bit to let those emotions out for awhile. Stuck and suppressed emotions hurt more and they always find a way to get out in one way or another. Can i ask you, Who ended the connection, him or you? Does he reach out sometime or it was cold ending? Was there an attemp to mame this work and be together? You don't have to respond if you don't feel like digging into it again.

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 10, 2018 02:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm okay I can talk about it.

He ended it as the guilt of cheating on his wife consumed him. If it was purely physical and not emotional and mental he likely would have been ok still seeing me. Also his wife is a prostitute.

I have an open mind. But I will never understand how you can be married and be a hooker. How could he not care all these men a paying to have sex with his wife is beyond me.

They only see each other 1 day a week, so no wonder he was looking for something else.

Sounds like it just went from deep to shallow huh?

I think his moon in Aquarius in his 2H, he puts money before love and emotions.

I can't figure out why I had to go through this.

Reach out to me?! There's is no chance for us to have had a platonic relationship anyway. The love and our connection was too strong.

It ended badly. In court. I destroyed her as she decided to blame ME! For his philandering ways! Let's just say, she learned the hard way messing with a woman with her moon in Scorpio.

I understood crimes of passion after this experience. I've never wanted someone so dead until this. If his wife was dead all would be well.

How fu cked up is that!

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Jazabel
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posted December 10, 2018 02:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh my ...intense. Why would he feel guilty towars his wife for cheating if she waa doing it all the time, and for money?

No, I was asking if there was an attempt from his part to leave his wife and be with you in a comitted relationship

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 10, 2018 04:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No never.

We were (online) friends first though before it turned into more..

He mentioned that if he was ever single again he would move out of the city.

And other time, 're his marriage I said you never know what the future holds, and he agreed.

But nothing like, I am leaving my wife for you. Plus I don't think I could handle being in a relationship with someone who had done that.

If he breaks up with her for his own reasons and only after he gets divorced, yes I would see him again now, but that's unlikely.

She only cheated on him physically and l guess they just both saw it as a job.

But he was cheating on her mentally and emotionally which would be far worse. Plus he was falling for me. Falling in love with another woman is not going to help any marriage. He tried to maintain a friendship afterwards, but I remind him he was still cheating emotionally and he agreed. Then completely cut ties with me because that's when his wife found out.

Plus I don't know there financial situation, maybe she partly supports him too.

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 10, 2018 04:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The other guy a mentioned in the other post, was the only person I've been with intimate since him.

I thought it would be good for me for him not to be the last man I'm with and to help cut the cords with him the man I'm in love with, but no, it didn't really help.

He was just a slight distraction.

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Jazabel
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posted December 10, 2018 05:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I totally understand. What a story !

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 10, 2018 05:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Now maybe you understand why said I never wanted to fall in love again.

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Jazabel
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posted December 10, 2018 11:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
where is the Priapus in this synastry? Priapus is the point of merging, or the desire to merge with another. What about Nessus? Valentine?

your and his 4th house rulers are conjunct in the 12th house. Its like deep within the deep

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Hikaru29
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posted December 11, 2018 12:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by TaurusVenusGirl:

I had it all with him. Best friends, tender and passionate love at the same time, spiritual, mental and emotional connection. It was all there and ran both ways.

No one could possibly tell me it was one sided regardless of what the synastry or composite said. He felt it too. As deeply as I did too.

He is my soulmate. But one I can't be with in this lifetime.


What a story...I feel your pain as I was in such a r/s too. I've never experienced such sorrow of seemingly finding the right one yet we can't be together. For my case, he also thought he would not be emotionally involved but he was although he kept insisting he wasn't. I knew becos when I wanted to end things he refused to let me go. It was so hard to walk away yet maintaining a friendship is impossible becos the connection is so genuine. We have Neptune-Moon DW and Neptune-Venus DW.

I believe if it's meant to be, it will be. I'm happy that you have healed.

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Hikaru29
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posted December 11, 2018 12:43 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jazabel:
where is the Priapus in this synastry? Priapus is the point of merging, or the desire to merge with another. What about Nessus? Valentine?

your and his 4th house rulers are conjunct in the 12th house. Its like deep within the deep


What will Priapus conjunct Dsc mean? His Priapus is on my Dsc.

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 11, 2018 01:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I couldnt agree with you more Hikaru. If its meant to be it will be. If its not, then I will bump into a stronger love.

Valentine is shown on the chart on this post. I cannot find the asteroid Priapus on astro.com If you have a number for me that be great, I couldnt find one on google. Unless you are talking about H22?

If so mine conjuncts his ASC! And his is 6 degrees away from my Mercury and Chiron.

His Nessus conjuncts my Sun mine doesn't hit anything on his.

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Jazabel
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posted December 11, 2018 08:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
yes, Priapus is H22
it is the desire to merge with another and become One. Yours is conjunct his ASC, it is a very strong desire to merge with him as shown by this aspect. There were a lots of threads here on LL about Priapus.

Nessus is also found in the synastries of star crossed lovers, it shows a high degree of obsession. I still don't know who is the obsessed one, the Nessus person or the Nessus partner, but the aspect never fails to show obsession and passion.

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Hikaru29
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posted December 11, 2018 10:41 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
So the Priapus person feels it?

And what's the difference - Priapus, Pluto, Eros, Lilith... they are all sexual and they wanna "merge" with the other?

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 11, 2018 01:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't understand why the priapus person would feel this only. If his Sun conjunctions my dsc, the dsc person feels it more, if his moon conjuncts my IC the IC person feels it more... this has been established.

So now if my Priapus conjuncts his ASC who feels it more, like the above, the angle person feels it more.

I've read nessus conjunction is a 2 way street. But it seems the nessus person feels it more.

But like I said before he felt the same way about me too. None of this is one sided. I was there, I know how he felt for me. And just like he told me, if he wasn't married, he'd be with me too.

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Jazabel
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posted December 11, 2018 02:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't know, in my own synastry I'm the Priapus person conjunct his Venus and his DSC and every time I read about it, it says the Priapus person wants to merge. It's not an asteroid or a planet, it's a hypothetical point, so it doesn't emit energy onto a partner but it feels stuff within self. Much like BML.

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 11, 2018 02:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
If I do the synastry chart, with me on outside, it shows how I influence him. So I would read them all the same, my Venus conjunct his DSC, he feels it more, my Priapus conjunct his ASC, he feels it more. Shouldn't make a difference if it's a planet, asteroid, angle or point. It's my influence on him based on that chart selection.

But thank you for pointing me to priapus. I hadn't heard of it before.

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TaurusVenusGirl
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posted December 11, 2018 03:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TaurusVenusGirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I should add, this is coming up to the 3 year mark soon. And I'm moving on from this.

I'm not pinning away for him or whatever this was meant to be. I'm ready for a relationship. But I doubt it will happen. I'd rather watch my girlfriends complain there are no good men out there!

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Jazabel
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posted December 11, 2018 03:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Good luck and thanks for this

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Hikaru29
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posted December 11, 2018 11:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jazabel:
I don't know, in my own synastry I'm the Priapus person conjunct his Venus and his DSC and every time I read about it, it says the Priapus person wants to merge. It's not an asteroid or a planet, it's a hypothetical point, so it doesn't emit energy onto a partner but it feels stuff within self. Much like BML.

I'm interested to know how the Priapus person feels in real life. Can you share your experience?

Also you mentioned Lilith... so if Lilith conjuncts Venus, it's the Lilith person that's triggered? I always read that it's the Venus person that's under the Lilith's spell.

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Jazabel
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posted December 12, 2018 12:13 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jazabel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Hikaru29:
I'm interested to know how the Priapus person feels in real life. Can you share your experience?

Also you mentioned Lilith... so if Lilith conjuncts Venus, it's the Lilith person that's triggered? I always read that it's the Venus person that's under the Lilith's spell.


I was reading about this before, as I am both the Lilith and the Priapus in my synatsry. Typically but not always, Priapus and Lilith are found to be opposite each other in natal chart. In my case, my Priapus conjuncts his Venus and DSC while my Lilith conjuncts his ASC and opposites his Venus. Most texts or videos (especially watch the video by Jewell -Lilith theme in relationships), they talk about the planet person being under the spell of the ever bewitching Lilith. The planet person cannot let go while Lilith seems to be able to cut the tie and move on, that's what they say. However as far as Priapus go, the articles say that Priapus is consumed with the urge to copulate with the planet person, the desire to merge is strong and overwhelming. And thats how I felt, me being the Priapus.

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Hikaru29
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posted December 12, 2018 12:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hikaru29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jazabel:
I was reading about this before, as I am both the Lilith and the Priapus in my synatsry. Typically but not always, Priapus and Lilith are found to be opposite each other in natal chart. In my case, my Priapus conjuncts his Venus and DSC while my Lilith conjuncts his ASC and opposites his Venus. Most texts or videos (especially watch the video by Jewell -Lilith theme in relationships), they talk about the planet person being under the spell of the ever bewitching Lilith. The planet person cannot let go while Lilith seems to be able to cut the tie and move on, that's what they say. However as far as Priapus go, the articles say that Priapus is consumed with the urge to copulate with the planet person, the desire to merge is strong and overwhelming. And thats how I felt, me being the Priapus.

Thanks for this. It gives me more perspectives on how he's feeling. But is the feeling of copulation fleeting as in the Priapus person moves on after awhile? Or it's a continuous urge for you?

For my case, with his Priapus on my Dsc and Lilith on my Venus, his urge to have sex with me was instant... from the moment he set eyes on me, but my urge for sex built up over time. And subsequently it became a constant urge from both sides but I'm not sure about now.

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Simplykind
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posted November 14, 2019 03:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Simplykind     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I do not see this man ever having feelings for you, infact he only wanted sex with you...I see you as stalking these poor people to the point where your so vengeful it eats you up inside and you become ill

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