posted November 05, 2019 01:56 PM            

I am trying to support her and let her go on her own personal journey with this. I don't want to judge, but I am having a really hard time with the guy she is with now. She keeps asking me for my opinion of him/his intentions but I have nothing positive to say about this situation.

Short-story: They know each other because he is best friends with her cousin. He's 11 years younger than her. Just got out of prison for robbing a church to buy drugs. Is a heroine addict who has stolen from her friends and family members. Is unemployed and is clearly not capable of a serious relationship with anyone right now - he needs to figure his life out.

They are not in a relationship or consider themselves "dating". This is his preference - she clearly is more into him and wants a relationship with him but is holding back because it's not what he wants.

I've met him. He is fun to be around and overall a nice person to have a few drinks with - he's open and very friendly and I do genuinely enjoy his company, but I do not believe he really wants to be with her. I've seen them together and I don't personally see much chemistry btw them - however, she insists that they have this "amazing chemistry" and she can't "quit" this because of their chemistry.

Can you guys take a quick peek at their charts and tell me what the heck she sees in this? Do they actually have chemistry? Could this really be a love connection? Or is she deluding herself? Should I just stand back and let this play out? Or will he just continue to hurt her?

Synastry:

posted November 05, 2019 03:34 PM            

I'm supposing your friend is inside/blu.

There is chemistry between them, but that's the only thing that seems to be there.
Your friend, with her Chiron opposite ASC/Uranus, unconsciously looks for her self-worth through "serving" a wounded person, but this is self-damaging instead cause this is a wrong leading path in her life (Node and Mars in 12th square her Sun in 9th).
The chemistry between them can give her some intimate, exciting moments, but in the long run this is damaging her.
I see a typical toxic pattern where he's a self-damaging unstable person who can manipulate others emotion in search of a stable point in his life, but he's not going to be a stable person, his Uranus/Neptune square MC/NN (and her Pluto is attached to his MC).
From the synastry it seems clear that he hasnt sincere feelings neither much respect to her devotion, the Saturn/Moon conjunction square to his Mars.
Especially, His Saturn is opposite the Venus/Chiron conjunction, this is the typical toxic pattern I was talking about, a relationship based on his self-damaging issues and her self-damaging devotion.
The Composite signals that he might also be a player and she might get heartbroken, Neptune, Saturn and Uranus are square to Mars. Comp. Neptune is also square to MC, and Pluto square to the Nodes, plus Venus in 12th house square Moon in 8th, so I dont think this has a future, and the longer it lasts, the harsher the heartbreak is going to be for your friend...
Sorry for being a little harsh in this reading...

posted November 09, 2019 05:03 AM            

You need to be blunt with your friend as she is not self-aware at all and seems incapable of learning from her mistakes. This is what I would say to her:

"What do you want from men? What is your end game?"

[chances are she will say she wants a loving, long term relationship or even marriage)

"I love you and care about you, so I will only say this once and what you do with my advice is up to you. If you want a loving marriage, then why are you pursuing men like this? Your actions and life choices do not indicate that you want a stable and loving relationship. "If you had a daughter, would you want her to date a man or even be friends with a man who went to prison because he stole from a church? Does this sound like a man who has any decency or morals? Is it possible he could change and become the type of man who would make a good husband or partner? Sure, it's a possibility, but only HE has the ability to change. You cannot change anyone. People are not fixer-upper homes. They have their own mind and willpower. You cannot force your own desires on them."

I would then tell her that she needs to see a therapist to sort out the reason she keeps chasing after self-destructive men. Perhaps she had a cold and unloving father so she is looking for men in all the wrong places. Whatever the reason is, she needs to figure this out now and work on herself. This former prisoner she is crushing on is not marriage material, but neither is your friend. Perhaps your friend is a nice person, but no decent guy will approach her because she has a sign that says "hot mess" plastered on her forehead. It's well past time for her to see a therapist and grow up. Chasing after the bad boys is pathetic after 25 or so (and even that's a little old).

posted November 09, 2019 08:33 AM            

I'm picking up an immediate flag with her Mars-Uranus conjunction the 12th.

Obviously there are some self worth issues at play here and Moon opposite Neptune does love to romanticise and dream up scenarios. The Mars is the key though.

In this position it can be quite passive aggressive and she's using these men to play out her subconscious fears and issues. Mars-Uranus doesn't tend to seek conventional relationships and is interested in the ups and downs of not knowing, but because its in her 12th she's not quite aware of what she's projecting.

She has quite a powerful energy which scares her a bit, so she gives this power away, so as to relinquish responsibility. His Pluto position is helping highlight some of these issues for her to work though.

I would advise her to look at her personal growth and not give him all the credit for the revelations. There is great sexual chemistry, but not emotional. His Moon on her Saturn makes her feel respected and validated, a feeling she cannot generate from within.

This relationship does provide a karmic purpose for both parties. Another thing to remind her is that men usually say what they think, this notion that they are pretending not to have feelings is purely a movie perspective. "Hes just not that into you" is far closer to the truth.

When a man falls in love it is blatantly obvious, but what is also obvious from her chart is that she is not yet looking for, or ready for true love.

She would be an excellent hypnotherapist, and stepping into her life path will open up her heart and aid the healing process.

posted November 14, 2019 04:11 PM            

I wonder what this placement means for women..I'm a lesbian, and cannot stomach Men telling me what to do, or how to do anything, especially from an authoritative position.

quote:

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Originally posted by Librapurr:
I heard several stories about questionable morality/ behavior men with Leo mars square moon . I wonder if this placement responsible for bad attitude toward women they like..

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posted November 15, 2019 03:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astra:
Your friend has serious issues if she likes men like this. She is clearly an older woman if she is old enough to like an adult male who is 11 years younger than her. This means she should know better as she is not some naive 20 year old.

You need to be blunt with your friend as she is not self-aware at all and seems incapable of learning from her mistakes. This is what I would say to her:

"What do you want from men? What is your end game?"

[chances are she will say she wants a loving, long term relationship or even marriage)

"I love you and care about you, so I will only say this once and what you do with my advice is up to you. If you want a loving marriage, then why are you pursuing men like this? Your actions and life choices do not indicate that you want a stable and loving relationship. "If you had a daughter, would you want her to date a man or even be friends with a man who went to prison because he stole from a church? Does this sound like a man who has any decency or morals? Is it possible he could change and become the type of man who would make a good husband or partner? Sure, it's a possibility, but only HE has the ability to change. You cannot change anyone. People are not fixer-upper homes. They have their own mind and willpower. You cannot force your own desires on them."

I would then tell her that she needs to see a therapist to sort out the reason she keeps chasing after self-destructive men. Perhaps she had a cold and unloving father so she is looking for men in all the wrong places. Whatever the reason is, she needs to figure this out now and work on herself. This former prisoner she is crushing on is not marriage material, but neither is your friend. Perhaps your friend is a nice person, but no decent guy will approach her because she has a sign that says "hot mess" plastered on her forehead. It's well past time for her to see a therapist and grow up. Chasing after the bad boys is pathetic after 25 or so (and even that's a little old).

Their synastry is irrelevant. This guy is an expert manipulator and knows how to get what he wants. He is only hanging around your friend for sex, money and a little ego boost. He doesn't care about her at all. She needs to cut ties and move on.

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