Posts: 22
From: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Registered: May 2020

posted October 04, 2020 06:03 PM            

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I bought a synastry report from Liz Greene and although I enjoyed it and found it quite insightful it was in parts very difficult to read/ understand as it was mostly written using metaphors and analogies..
She wrote this about my partner and was hoping someone could simplify / dumb it down for me because I'm reading this as 'he is susceptible to being unfaithful..'

Thankyou

❤❤❤❤

Phallic Power
One of the most basic attributes of the hero in myth is his success with women (he always gets the ones he wants, regardless of the strength of his rivals). The phallic power of this image of manhood is unmistakeable. Conquest, whether of an opponent or of an object of desire, is the hallmark of heroic masculinity. However, compulsive conquest is not, nor is a repeating pattern of love-triangles which involve beating a rival or being the object of two rivals' desire. There seem to be some rather complicated issues at work within your partner around his need to prove his masculinity through sexual conquest - real or imagined. But the underlying dilemma here is not simply an issue of erotic conquest. It is a conflict between freedom and commitment, and a reflection of something within him which does not want his world of possibilities and potentials circumscribed by too great a tie to one relationship. It is possible that something of the same free wandering spirit existed in his father, although this parent may not have been able to live this within the structure of his family life. If such an energy cannot find vehicles through creative expression, it often translates itself into fantasy loves (acted out or not) which are the symbol of freedom and dramatic excitement. It has been said that Don Juan did not really like women; they were simply the proof of his potency, which he had to keep renewing because he did not feel it inside. Your partner's own inner restlessness is something with which he will have to contend, for it is an aspect of the fighting and conquering spirit that forms the core of his masculine character. Knights and mythic heroes do not, after all, stay home to mow the lawn and clip the hedges. But it may be that the boundless horizons he seeks are those of the artist and the visionary rather than those of the philanderer. If he finds that this restless spirit begins to create difficulties between the two of you, perhaps he might need to examine his life to see whether there are sufficient creative vehicles to challenge his imagination. Thus, whatever conflicts your partner may experience on the conscious level about what constitutes strength and power, he has a powerful need within him to conquer and to assert his own individuality in the world. The more honestly he is able to live this spirit, the more relaxed he can be in his personal life with you. The more he repudiates his self-assertive instincts, however, the more likely he will be to feel dominated by others; and this will inevitably make him domineering and controlling within your relationship in order to compensate for his feelings of general impotence in life. In certain circles, terms like "power", "authority" and "achievement" are unfashionable, because they have been made to carry negative ideological connotations. But the archetypal image of the fighter and champion is no social creation. It is as old as time and is the most fundamental image of masculinity that the human imagination has ever created. If it is thwarted within your partner, it could produce the "If I can't have it then you shouldn't either" spirit of envy and sourness, which blights any real capacity to enjoy life. If his aggression has run amok at the expense of his human relationships, it is probably because he is trying to compensate for a deep inner feeling of impotence. But if he can live this potent spirit with balance, he has an enormously effective force for good - in his personal life and in the world.

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posted October 05, 2020 01:38 AM            

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You are reading her comment correctly ... BUT ... if this the man in your thread at http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/010336.html (with the Mars-Venus-Moon-Jupiter cradle configuration in 3rd-9th-7th-4th houses?), her "can one woman meet all his needs" message is conveyed much better in the song I know him so well ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9fH34n1lv8

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From: Sydney, NSW, Australia
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posted October 05, 2020 02:09 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Graham:
You are reading her comment correctly ... BUT ... if this the man in your thread at http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum35/HTML/010336.html (with the Mars-Venus-Moon-Jupiter [b]cradle configuration in 3rd-9th-7th-4th houses?), her "can one woman meet all his needs" message is conveyed much better in the song I know him so well ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9fH34n1lv8 [/B]

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Thanks Graham, yes that is indeed him!
I listened to the song (very fitting!) and so you are saying that one woman cant meet all his needs?

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posted October 05, 2020 11:35 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Laylay:
Thanks Graham, yes that is indeed him!
I listened to the song (very fitting!) and so you are saying that one woman cant meet all his needs?

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Singer Tom Jones is a good example :-

He loved his (now deceased) wife very much; she loved him very much too ... and they were childhood sweethearts - who had stayed together, married and remained together until her recent death.

However, when Tom became famous (and touring became his way of life) he soon realised that he would be unable to resist all of the women who now wanted to be with him. ... So, he immediately discussed this with his wife - who was able to accept that "when he cannot be with the woman he loves, it's ok for him to love the woman he is with".

This worked for them ... and Tom always made it known publicly (and to the other women) that he loved his wife; always would and had no intention of ever leaving her.

But ... would that kind of openness, honesty and realism work for you?

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posted October 06, 2020 04:12 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Graham:

But ... would that kind of openness, honesty and realism work for you?

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I actually discussed this with him. He has a rich and active fantasy world where he does fantasise about other women but would never act on it in real life if he were in a committed relationship. His father had an affair and a child with another woman which broke his family up so he said he would never do what his father did. I told him it's okay to fantasize about other women and I dont think it's not normal or unnatural and he seemed to really appreciate that.
I think ultimately it will come down to trust. I dont think a traditional relationship will ever work for him, so it's up to me to decide if I can deal with that.
Thanks so much Graham 😊

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posted October 06, 2020 04:32 PM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Laylay:
I actually discussed this with him. He has a rich and active fantasy world where he does fantasise about other women but would never act on it in real life if he were in a committed relationship. His father had an affair and a child with another woman which broke his family up so he said he would never do what his father did. I told him it's okay to fantasize about other women and I dont think it's not normal or unnatural and he seemed to really appreciate that.
I think ultimately it will come down to trust. I dont think a traditional relationship will ever work for him, so it's up to me to decide if I can deal with that.
Thanks so much Graham 😊

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In this situation, role playing is a potential solution.

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posted October 10, 2020 04:05 PM            

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Originally posted by Graham:
In this situation, role playing is a potential solution.

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That is a great suggestion and we've been talking more about this. He said so long as he has the freedom to fantasize without guilt, his fantasies would always be enough. Thanks for your responses Graham it helped me think about this more objectively than i normally would and talk openly and honestly with him about his love for women. All I can say is wish us luck!

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posted October 11, 2020 01:11 AM            

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quote:

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Originally posted by Laylay:
That is a great suggestion and we've been talking more about this. He said so long as he has the freedom to fantasize without guilt, his fantasies would always be enough. Thanks for your responses Graham it helped me think about this more objectively than i normally would and talk openly and honestly with him about his love for women. All I can say is wish us luck!

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You will not need luck ... provided the two of you continue to confront (rather than ignore) the inevitable "elephant in the room" issues, since openness and honesty are the foundations of long-term relationships.

So ... best wishes.

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