posted October 19, 2020 11:13 AM            

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Originally posted by Hikaru29:
Hi Graham,
I don't wanna overwhelm you but can you also help interpret me and my guy's Davison Chart? I'll open a separate thread if you're willing. I've been looking at our Composite mostly so I'm curious what our Davison says, especially since it shows the purpose of the relationship which is something that's been on my mind.

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posted October 20, 2020 03:53 AM            

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Hiya Graham I was wondering if you are able to look at these charts of me and my ex as I was recommended to you by another user on here? please note that his TOB is an estimate as from a reading i had ages ago said that he is possibly Libra Asc so I have estimated a time where his Asc is Libra. My TOB is correct.

My back story with him is that we dated from 2009-2010 which resulted in a breakup of me being young and naive we were 17 at the time of the break up and in 2013 we almost tried again but ended up having a bad fallout that resulted in no contact. Two weeks ago I sent him a long overdue apology message that hopefully we can both heal from everything and possibly reconcile.

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Let's start with the Davison chart (to identify the purpose of the relationship).

Because his time of birth is unknown, we have to ignore the houses (and Moon) in any chart that is calculated using his his birth data. ... However, we know for sure that this Davison Virgo Sun falls in your natal 1st house - as does its conjunction with both Mercury and Jupiter.

So, this Davison Sun is learning to be discerning (Virgo) - and, for you, that is the key to expressing your individuality (1st house).
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Next ... let's look at the synastry (to identify what might have caused the two of you to break up). ... Here, we need to look at the "difficult" connections/aspects of your outer planets to his inner planets (excluding Moon) and vice versa (but including your Moon + angles, because your birth time is known). ... And those are :-

1. His Uranus square your Sun. ... Both partners find the other exciting and attractive, with the Sun encouraging Uranus to be uninhibited and Uranus urging the Sun to be more independent. ... Eventually though, the square is likely to make the Uranus partner feel suffocated by the relationship - and to offset that by spending less time with the Sun partner. ... Hence, the Uranus partner's need for freedom is an elephant-in-the-room issue that, if not confronted, will eventually result in the relationship breaking down.

2. His Uranus opposite your Mars. ... Here, each partner is ideally equipped to fire up the other's anger. He will see you as strong-willed enough to threaten his independence - and respond by behaving in ways that you'll see as him being inconsiderate. You will then refuse to be "pushed around"/treated inconsiderately - and waste no time in demonstrating that "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" ... thus opening the relationship-terminating door, through which he will not hesitate to walk.

3. His Neptune square your Sun. ... He will have excessive expectations of you. And you will find it increasingly difficult to live up to the pedestal upon which he places you.

4. His Neptune opposite your Mars. ... initially, he will perceive you as having Mars qualities that he admires - but the opposition will eventually cause him to see the Mars qualities that you actually have (which he may or may not also admire).

5. His Pluto conjunct your Venus. ... He is likely to see (in you) a feminine quality which he has himself but is unable to openly express. And, if that makes him uncomfortable, he will attempt to control your physical appearance or/and change your values - which you may tolerate initially, but not forever.

6. Your Saturn opposite his Mercury. ... You may attempt to stop him from discussing/talking about things which make you feel uncomfortable, or embarrassed. If so, you will do that by questioning his reasoning, grammar, use of semantics and other forms of diverting discussions/"going off topic" - which he may tolerate initially, but not forever.

posted October 20, 2020 08:06 PM            

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Originally posted by Graham:
Originally posted by LibraGirl92 :-

Let's start with the Davison chart (to identify the purpose of the relationship).

Because his time of birth is unknown, we have to ignore the houses (and Moon) in any chart that is calculated using his his birth data. ... However, we know for sure that this Davison Virgo Sun falls in [b]your natal 1st house - as does its conjunction with both Mercury and Jupiter.

So, this Davison Sun is learning to be discerning (Virgo) - and, for you, that is the key to expressing your individuality (1st house).
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Next ... let's look at the synastry (to identify what might have caused the two of you to break up). ... Here, we need to look at the "difficult" connections/aspects of your outer planets to his inner planets (excluding Moon) and vice versa (but including your Moon + angles, because your birth time is known). ... And those are :-

1. His Uranus square your Sun.

2. His Uranus opposite your Mars.

3. His Neptune square your Sun.

4. His Neptune opposite your Mars.

5. His Pluto conjunct your Venus.

6. Your Saturn opposite his Mercury.

[/B]

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posted October 20, 2020 11:54 PM            

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I thought venus conjunct pluto was not a bad aspect

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In Astrology - Understanding The Birth Chart, astrologer Kevin Burk describes planets in detriment as being "like Sylvester Stallone playing Juliet on Broadway because he insists that playing Juliet will be the best thing for his career. No-one is going to tell him he cannot do it, but that does not mean he's going to do well in the part."

However ... since Pluto is very much "at home" in its own sign of Scorpio ... this conjunction makes it likely that JAK will "tell it like it is", and you to be not willing/able to hear those (emotionally painful) "home-truths".

posted October 21, 2020 12:21 AM            

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Originally posted by LibraGirl92:
Okay thank you for the info.
So with the synastry and composite and I know I don't have his TOB could he possibly play a significant role in my life (could we be a match to marry?)
I have always felt that he was meant to be in my life and possibly that he could be a soulmate (if that's possible) or can we not truly know as we don't have is TOB?

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The charts indicate a compatibility that could result in a happy (and long-term) relationship/marriage, if both partners are able to confront/talk-through the inevitable problems that will arise.

But ... bear in mind here that you have not taken the opportunity on this thread to discuss the "interesting" astrological aspects which are likely to need confronting. ... So, will you be "ready"/willing/able to confront emotionally painful relationship problems with a partner as-and-when-they-arise in the future?

posted October 21, 2020 01:54 AM            

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Originally posted by Graham:
The charts indicate a compatibility that could result in a happy (and long-term) relationship/marriage, [b]if both partners are able to confront/talk-through the inevitable problems that will arise.

But ... bear in mind here that you have not taken the opportunity on this thread to discuss the "interesting" astrological aspects which are likely to need confronting. ... So, will you be "ready"/willing/able to confront emotionally painful relationship problems with a partner as-and-when-they-arise in the future?

[/B]

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posted October 21, 2020 02:36 AM            

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If I could possibly know what they mean I could give input as I said before I don’t really know astrology that much just basics.

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My point is that - despite not knowing what they mean - you did not seek an explanation/expansion/clarification of them (from me)*.

In effect ... you did not confront the "elephant-in-the-room" issue (with me) ... of "what is the point of listing these aspects without providing an interpretation/explanation of them, Graham?"

So ... if being socially polite (or whatever) made you avoid/side-step the issue of unhelpful comments/asinine behaviour from a stranger (me) ... how likely is it that you will engage in emotionally painful confrontations with a partner whom you love? ... Yet, being ready/willing/able to do that is the key to successful long-term relationships.

[ * Note : I shall now return to my reply containing that list, and provide an interpretation/explanation of the aspects.]

posted October 21, 2020 05:43 AM            

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Originally posted by LibraGirl92:
Apologies as with my thought process you didn’t put anything as you probably thought I knew. My mind process has been scattered lately due to dealing with personal issues. I’m not trying to be rude or anything like that so apologies ❤️

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posted October 22, 2020 01:00 AM            

2. His Uranus opposite your Mars. ... Here, each partner is ideally equipped to fire up the other's anger. He will see you as strong-willed enough to threaten his independence - and respond by behaving in ways that you'll see as him being inconsiderate. You will then refuse to be "pushed around"/treated inconsiderately - and waste no time in demonstrating that "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" ... thus opening the relationship-terminating door, through which he will not hesitate to walk.
(I honestly do have a temper which I really try to keep in check and I remember saying stuff that could set him off and when he got set off I honestly felt as I don't have time for this and just get even more anger)
3. His Neptune square your Sun. ... He will have excessive expectations of you. And you will find it increasingly difficult to live up to the pedestal upon which he places you.
(Ah now this.....I remember he told me I had to be around a certain weight or when I thought of colouring my hair I am a natural blonde and when I wanted to go darker and showed him a picture of me with darker hair he told me no to stay blonde)

posted October 22, 2020 01:16 AM            

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Originally posted by LibraGirl92:
I have copied and pasted your explanations so far in parenthesis is my feedback :-)
1. His Uranus square your Sun. ... Both partners find the other exciting and attractive, with the Sun encouraging Uranus to be uninhibited and Uranus urging the Sun to be more independent. ... Eventually, though, the square is likely to make the Uranus partner feel suffocated by the relationship - and to offset that by spending less time with the Sun partner. ... Hence, the Uranus partner's need for freedom is an elephant-in-the-room issue that, if not confronted, will eventually result in the relationship breaking down.
(This was true especially the few months before leading up to the breakup. I think I was trying to get him to stay it felt as though he probably felt suffocated and I didn't give him that space in which he needed)

2. His Uranus opposite your Mars. ... Here, each partner is ideally equipped to fire up the other's anger. He will see you as strong-willed enough to threaten his independence - and respond by behaving in ways that you'll see as him being inconsiderate. You will then refuse to be "pushed around"/treated inconsiderately - and waste no time in demonstrating that "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" ... thus opening the relationship-terminating door, through which he will not hesitate to walk.
(I honestly do have a temper which I really try to keep in check and I remember saying stuff that could set him off and when he got set off I honestly felt as I don't have time for this and just get even more anger)
3. His Neptune square your Sun. ... He will have excessive expectations of you. And you will find it increasingly difficult to live up to the pedestal upon which he places you.
(Ah now this.....I remember he told me I had to be around a certain weight or when I thought of colouring my hair I am a natural blonde and when I wanted to go darker and showed him a picture of me with darker hair he told me no to stay blonde)

4. His Neptune opposite your Mars. ... initially, he will perceive you as having Mars qualities that he admires - but the opposition will eventually cause him to see the Mars qualities that you actually have (which he may or may not also admire).
(I want to try and comment on this one but I can't think of anything at the moment at this one as we only dated for a short period so this one is a bit tricky to give feedback on)

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But ... with the benefit of hindsight + 10 years of maturing ... can you now see how identifying and confronting these issues might have prevented the relationship from breaking down?

posted October 22, 2020 04:16 AM            

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he is the type in my eyes to possibly not want to fix it

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posted October 23, 2020 03:42 AM            

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Originally posted by LibraGirl92:
I would possibly say so as me and him haven’t spoken since our bad fallout in 2013 as we almost tried to date again. I sent the apology message last month and still haven’t heard so either he isn’t ready to talk about things or doesn’t really want me in his life

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Currently though, might he not be responding because he is now in a relationship with someone else.

[Btw ... I have now completed my October 20th comment, about what might have caused the two of you to break up.]