posted November 26, 2020 11:38 AM            

These are all my charts of A and I. They include a midpoint composite chart, a reference place composite chart (with the place and date when we first met) and a synastry chart.
http://imgur.com/a/BBlSYfs

I have analysed, psychoanalysed our charts trying to pick apart new things and trying to see how this manifested in our relationship. It's been my way to learn more about astrology and composite charts.

The urgency comes from him moving away to his home country (most likely permanently). There's a lot of Neptune and pluto energy up in here. Everything that happened in this short-lived relationship was predicted by me (Idk if the natal Neptune in 12th has to do with that). I had Moon do a lot of tarot readings with a lot of questions that were really distracting me, it provided a lot of healing as well as answers I already knew but just needed confirmation on.

I would love to hear anyone's thoughts on this. Is this marriage material? Is this a substantial relationship? Are there any warning signs (tbh events have already passed that were very destructive but I would like to see this astrologically).

This was my first ever relationship, I am not an easy person to commit to anyone especially with the nature of our relationship. We went through struggles no couple go through in such a short amount of time. This was a relationship that scared him but he loved me endlessly (not really shown through actions consistently [venus square Saturn sigh].

posted November 26, 2020 09:03 PM            

The major problem is Uranus square to the Jupiter/Saturn conjunction.this is an aspect of instability and breakup.it seems no matter how the pros and cons of a serious relationship were counted,he could never overcome his ambivalence or his need of independences.
The node on the DSC/sac axis gives a psychic connection but it both partners are on the same page in regard to this aspect,then this can show one trying to control and dominate the other with perusing arguments...sometines over nothing.
You might add the vertex.as it is there was a almost paranormal feeling to this relationship

Mars conjunct to Neptune and square to psyche would have been the red flag that he was a player,but I think he was caught off guard when his intentions to just"use your body" fell off into a spiritual attraction also .I think you touched him in ways he did not know people can touch.

posted November 27, 2020 02:05 PM            

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But then the mars is conjunct to neptune and square to psyche.this give a almost opposite sexual/emotional involvement.it gives a sensitive and spiritualized attraction.so he might act a player but then turn around and show you sensitivity ,respect and considerations that could only occur with a deep love of you.

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This opposite sexual/emotional attachment is so spot on. He was so into me and I was the complete opposite. He cringed me out. I felt objectified etc etc etc. He was an f boy but he really wanted to change. We only met each other twice irl, the time spent for most of our relationship was through virtual means. He always said how it was different with me. He saw me as perfect and it bewildered me. I think it may be his neptune in 1st house natally and my neptune conjunct asc natally coming through.

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The Jupiter/Juno midpoint is conjunct eris so the image of marriage came up early.

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This is also true, he always said he wanted to marry me and saw it in his dreams. I never was the one to mention it first.

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The major problem is Uranus square to the Jupiter/Saturn conjunction.this is an aspect of instability and breakup.it seems no matter how the pros and cons of a serious relationship were counted,he could never overcome his ambivalence or his need of independences.

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This is interesting. His independence aggravated me because he failed to communicate about what he was doing.

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The node on the DSC/sac axis gives a psychic connection but it both partners are on the same page in regard to this aspect,then this can show one trying to control and dominate the other with perusing arguments...sometines over nothing.
You might add the vertex.as it is there was a almost paranormal feeling to this relationship

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I was definitely the one who pursued the arguments.

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Mars conjunct to Neptune and square to psyche would have been the red flag that he was a player,but I think he was caught off guard when his intentions to just"use your body" fell off into a spiritual attraction also .I think you touched him in ways he did not know people can touch.

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posted November 27, 2020 02:17 PM            

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This is a relationship that requires a strong willpower to carry a burden and likely to accept a big transformation in your path and self-awareness in order to work out. The Juno/Moon/Sun stellium is emotionally very binding and gives the comfortable feeling of belonging together, as the same "family" members, same as Jupiter/Saturn conjunct IC, but Juno/Moon/Sun is square to Pluto/Chiron and Jupiter/Saturn is square to Uranus. This means that one of the two carries a burden that will have a weight and likely gives an unstable trait, which likely will pose a challenge for long term. This burden or personal issue of one of the two will affect your emotional bond and carries emotional wounds and upheavals. I think this is too intense and potentially damaging one or both of you.

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I always commented on how comfortable I was with him because I've never felt like that with any guy before. He was my best friend. I'd say he had the burden and was something that I was constantly reminded of all the time. The things his ex did in the past really affected him especially financially. However, what we went through as a couple and a trial we faced became the reason I chose to end the relationship. It was so difficult because I loved him but I could not allow it. Him cheating seems like child's play compared to what I was put through lol.

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Lilith is conjunct South Node and trine Jupiter/Saturn, there are deep subconscious and karmic reasons in your relationship, you likely find in the other something you have deeply missed in your life, but at the same time there are other elements which might make this union unattainable, maybe cause of that burden or cause the circumstances are not favourable at material level... This is something you will have to necessarily go through, but my opinion is that you will part ways at one point.

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I knew from the beginning he was needed in my life. Not because of love but to teach me something. A lot of karmic issues. And, physically he is parting away. He's leaving the country to get over me.

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Transiting South Node is now conjunct to Chiron and square Moon, so you may try to get emotional healing in getting together and then transiting South Node will be square to Juno and conjunct Pluto, this is likely the moment you will be drawn to each other the most or struggle to get together on a stable basis. Pluto square Juno/Moon though is very obsessive so it's possible that one of the two will feel trapped or compelled for some reason.

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I guess this relationship may last until transiting North Node will be conjunct to IC/Saturn.

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When will this be?

Would you see any abuse present and from which side?

I have seen that the sun could represent the man in composite and the moon in composite. And in this chart, the moon and sun are almost equally aspected with the other planets, with more affecting the moon. Could you predict this as me being affected more? I would say yes because I was affected far more deeply than him. Not just emotionally but physically and how much I sacrificed with my beliefs for him.

posted November 29, 2020 04:05 PM            

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Originally posted by Stoika7: emotionally difficult painful letting go and still carrying the wounds of your relationship... Uranus retrograde is widely square Neptune so this is also suggesting a separation or long distance connection... transiting South Node will be conjunct to Pluto and square to Juno at the end of March 2021, so it's possible that something will keep you deeply connected but this carries an abusive and obsessive trait, so it might be that you will feel haunted or obsessed by this connection... by then, transiting Jupiter will be conjunct Uranus and square Saturn, so it's possible that this connection will be at long distance or that physical separation will occur... transiting north node will be conjunct to IC/Saturn square Uranus in spring 2022, this might be a definitive end, if not in spring 2021.

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posted November 29, 2020 04:12 PM            

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Originally posted by todd: Hi
I have an additional comment that is not directed at your charts.
Your intial presentation made me think you were concerned with preserving the relationship but every comment you made about my post indicates you are the cause the relationship is not on a solid standing.
Am I missing something or are you missing
something?

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Hi Todd. I'm ngl I felt attacked by this comment but you are correct.

I feel like I can't let go of this person and every time I've spoken to them, I forget all the bad things and feel so connected to them. It's like hugging a pillow or a bear. That sort of comfort. However, I was the reason for the end of the relationship.

posted November 29, 2020 08:04 PM            

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Originally posted by softissues:
Hi Todd. I'm ngl I felt attacked by this comment but you are correct.

I feel like I can't let go of this person and every time I've spoken to them, I forget all the bad things and feel so connected to them. It's like hugging a pillow or a bear. That sort of comfort. However, I was the reason for the end of the relationship.

They weren't talking to me every day, the norm was every few days so physically they distanced but I was the one to end it. It was very difficult to end it, but they assaulted me and put me through a lot of emotional turmoil if I was potentially pregnant. I have sacrificed a lot for this relationship and it was my first relationship. It was very toxic. Right now, I am in the process of healing and sometimes I forget about what happened, and I question why we're not together but then I remember why.

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Hi
My initial thoughts still seem vid.
But you were not the cause of the breakup. He was abusive to suggest you get seriluzbor married because with Uranus square to Saturn and Jupiter that was never in the cards.this hookup could have never been stae or permanent so for him insinuate it could be is disingenuous.

posted November 29, 2020 08:26 PM            

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Originally posted by todd:
Hi
My initial thoughts still seem vid.
But you were not the cause of the breakup. He was abusive to suggest you get seriluzbor married because with Uranus square to Saturn and Jupiter that was never in the cards.this hookup could have never been stae or permanent so for him insinuate it could be is disingenuous.

For a first relationship,I think your sexual naïve tricked you.you have Lilith/node/DSC stellium square to eris.this is extiremy sexual and in your sexual inexperience ,I think you thotugbt the sexual intensity was love.
Eris is very tricky in that way.Eris is very physical and not inclined to true love.
But with the former stellium,the sexuality was triggering the deepest emotional all feeling of love and soulmates. For him to process deep love is abusive e because in his heart I do not believe he believed it could or would survive.
You got hit with a eris aspect of the worst kind.the sexual chemistry fell directly on Tony mind,heart and soul when it was not so.

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Hi, I think I would disagree with you here. Yes, the relationship was sexual but I was never blinded by it. I was always questioning his love for me because it just didn't make sense. I naturally draw manipulative men with a lot of problems so I can spot them quite easily. He always would say that it was love and not lust but I always questioned that. Either he was really deceiving himself or he knew better.

This hookup wasn't stable because it was assault, it was never meant to happen because I didn't want it and because of it, we are here. I wasn't emotionally involved at all, I disassociated even though I was physically there. He felt like it was heaven and the best thing for him while I felt the complete opposite and that represents most of our relationship. He felt like he was on cloud nine while I was much slower to see that. My sense of comfort comes from how smooth our conversations are and the openness not because of being in awe of him and loving him, I don't think. I think the aftermath categorised the instability.

I got someone to do a tarot reading for me about this relationship and a lot of what I thought and what he said was confirmed. The sexual side was a compromisation not because I was in love with him but because I had love for him. I think they are two very different things.

So I think physically it affected me more because of how it affected my life, sacrificing my time etc. but emotionally it affected him more? What do you think?