posted May 07, 2021 05:48 PM            

A little back story. He showed up pretty much out of nowhere, and acted as if he had always been there. He was very flirtatious, but I thought it was all in fun. We became friends, we have dinner together and it is always fun and full of laughs. Mentally we are completely on the same page, which I find stimulating and validating. I am sexually attracted to him at times, and then not at others. At times it seems right, and at other times I see it as not a possibility. I don't know what to make of it, I don't know what his true intentions are. The biggest issue for me is our age difference. He is just outside of my age difference comfort zone. But my feelings are positive when I am with him, but cooled off when I am not. It is hard for me to understand and know what is happening.

I so appreciate any and all insight. Thank you so much!

His:

Mine:

posted May 07, 2021 06:59 PM            

I feel like this is a karmic/fated relationship but not one that has significant long term blueprints, if that makes sense?

Like the composite is... insane. So insane it made me re-read your post to double check if both birth times are accurate, and they are.

The Moon, Venus, and Uranus are in a t-square. I simply don't see this lasting. Because you are symbolically the Venus AND the Moon in the composite, you're going to be the one that blows hot and cold (which makes sense when you say that there are times you're attracted, and other times you're not).

Uranus is always present in big age gap relationships I've noticed. I think because the nature of age gap romance is taboo (Uranus), unconventional (Uranus), stimulating in strange ways (Uranus), don't often last very long (.... Uranus).

Which, I might add, is conjunct the MC which I find fascinating. This guy could help align you with your true purpose career-wise if you wanted, or he could elevate your social position amongst your friends (or, conversely, make you seem much more weird/out of the box to others).

Mars is on the ASC so I feel like the attraction is mutual (even if it flickers on and off on your part).

Juno is conjunct the South Node.. that is very curious to me. Could be a past life connection. I strongly orientate towards that school of thought because the Sun is making a wide square to the nodes too. So this relationship is pretty important for the both of you and effects both of you in equal measure.

I mean the Sun, Mercury, and Venus all being in the 7th house is quite lovely. There is just SO MUCH INSTABILITY present at the core of this that I don't see this person being husband material for you.

The nodes are currently going over the composite Venus, DSC, ASC, Mars and Moon. So what you're feeling for him is what you are destined to be feeling at this very moment. It seems like the universe is conspiring for you to have this present moment with him, absolutely.

Transit Uranus is conjunct your natal Chiron right now, and it's forming a conjunction with his natal Sun. You also have a Chiron/Sun conjunction in synastry by that logic. So I say... explore your feelings if all of the loose ends are tied in both of your lives. I think this could be highly fun and enrichening for the both of you. Frankly I'm kinda jealous because the chemistry is so sizzling here I'd like to experience something like this myself lol

posted May 07, 2021 07:49 PM            

And we are both plutonian so I believe the intensity is the biggest turn on. I do not think it would be long lasting, though even short term is relative. but I think what I am not sure of is what I am supposed to do here... follow the urge or resist. I definitely feel we are soulmates (eros psyche in the composite also points to this) and that we were past lovers.

He makes me feel loved, valued, beautiful, and confident. The comfort and acceptance between us is incredible, and in his actions he is very much my ideal. I feel my worry is that I am taking advantage of him by allowing him to shower me with these feelings when I know this is not long term. My respect and care for him is too much for me to let that happen. So to this point, I keep him at a distance.

I should also add I am not sure I want to start relationships that I know will come to a quick end... or any end at all. That has been a big thing holding me back. I am not interested in the heartbreak, theirs or mine.

Here is the synastry bi-wheel just in case.

posted May 08, 2021 01:13 AM            

So brilliant Athenia gave an awesome reading already and I agree with a lot of her points, but I figured I’d give my thoughts as well

So I’m not surprised you said you have these mixed feelings of attraction/repulsion towards him, you have a DW Venus-Mars opposition! Oppositions are polarizing and the aspect of extremes and create a push/pull dynamic, so Venus opposite Mars is a classic aspect of hot and cold, feeling very attracted but then just as repulsed like you mentioned! It’s VERY normal and people tend to enjoy it for the most part to put it lightly. It can be a very exciting, passionate, fun aspect and dynamic to have. Usually one person is the chaser or initiator and then it switches and the other person is running hot while the other is more cold etc. Game of cat and mouse if you will, and it tends to keep the passion alive longer, if not forever , so people love it. It’s exciting, keeps you on your toes, you’re less likely to become bored or for the dynamic to become mundane like you mentioned previously not enjoying.
I wonder though if it’s his Saturn square your Mars and your Saturn opposite his Mars though that’s adding more of the repulsion factor than usual and kinda tamping down the typical passion and chemistry of these aspects.... stupid Saturn 🙃 lol

There are quite a few things I like about this Synastry overall:
Moon sextile moon, mercury trine mercury, Venus in your 4th house, his moon conjunct your ASC etc. These are great compatibility aspects. I think you two have a pretty good harmony and feel very comfortable with each other.
You also have a grand cross pattern completion with his natal mercury-Jupiter and your natal sun-moon opposition. This will add a lot of chemistry and energy between you. Lively. think you two have lots of laughs and fun times together (Jupiter) and good stimulating or funny conversations (mercury).
BUT it is still hard aspects, so at times he could still have a hard time understanding you, arguments, you could feel misunderstood or vice versa or just some sort of communication issues (his mercury square your sun and moon, his mercury quincunx your mars, your mercury also square his moon, mercury square Pluto and mercury conjunct Pluto) But again, your mercuries being trine helps a lot! So it’s def not a deal breaker. Just a potential I see and food for thought/something to keep in mind if it does crop up. With the double hard mercury-pluto energy between you, this gives me the impression of power struggles, like neither of you will ever want to admit you’re wrong to the other, you might try change each other mind and challenge the others opinions a lot, or at the worst it might be prone to mind games/manipulation in the form of passive aggressive comments, gaslighting or undermining. Or an element of you guys thinking each of you can read the others mind/knows what you’re REALLY thinking or trying to say etc. which can be annoying and make the other seem arrogant or like a know it all. It can make you guys overthink or nit pick the others words too. Again, I’m just throwing out potential ways I’ve seen and ways that this could manifest between you two over time.

Another aspect I see as being problematic is your Saturn square his moon. It’s wider so shouldn’t be too big of an issue like if it was under 5 degrees, but his moon being in Scorpio which already feels a bit blocked and has a hard time opening up and being vulnerable and sharing definitely isn’t ideal to have mean ol stuffy saturn there making him feel even more blocked and fearing emotional intimacy with you. But again, you have a really good and strong mitigating factor for that with his moon conjunct your rising. This aspect is one of the very best in terms of trust and making moon feel comfortable opening up and wanting to share with the ascendant person. You also have his moon trine your sun and jupiter which is another great one, so it’s hard to say if you’ll even notice it enough to be a real issue.

posted May 08, 2021 08:00 AM            

You are pretty spot on about what you said Luna, though I failed to even see the Saturn Mars DW. This synastry is interesting to me bcs there is so much going on but so much of it is not tight that I don't see it all at first. It keeps layering and layering.

There is totally great affection and joy between us, and the mental connection is so refreshing. Definitely power struggles potential, but we are both strong minded and I think that is part of the fun and attraction- like finally a mental match that is up to par! The thing is that this could never really be a traditional relationship anyway. I will never live with him, nor he with me. We are at different points in life, but we both know that.

Our lives would remain fairly separate, but we would get together for fun and companionship. He is aware that I do not want a traditional relationship nor marriage, but we talk as friends and not discussing ourselves as lovers. I don't however know what he wants, or what he would be ok with.

He is a very committed, loyal, passionate and intense person. All things I love, yet I prefer to blend anonymously into life and he is anything but that so it's a bit uncomfortable for me as well. I have long felt we shared a past life together and he clearly feels no hesitation towards me, so why do I? That is the question I think about often.

with the composite focused on the 1st/7th house axis, I always wondered why our relationship was just friends. And now I see we must have been waiting for the right transits! The 9th is packed with outer planets, but I feel there is more to the meaning of that as well. I do feel we are mutually expanding our own personal spiritual evolution by being together, be it friends or lovers. And Juno in the 4th is intriguing to me, and trine composite Moon. I think this solidifies unity through emotional connection... which really is a great core aspect for a relationship if you ask me.