posted November 02, 2022 04:15 PM            

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Originally posted by tineyin:
My ex-boyfriend (Leo/Sag/Virgo, Leo Venus, Scorpio Mars) and I (Aqua/Virgo/Gem, Cap Venus, Pisces Mars) started off dating in person 6 months ago and we had started doing long distance a month ago. Two weeks ago, I had broken up with him for something bad he did and then he broke up with me the day after, stating he didn't remember me breaking up with him (he "was drunk"). After 3 hours of me pleading and finally leaving his apartment, he chased after me and agreed to give it another chance.

Last week when I went to visit him, I suggested we take a break for a month when I'm out of the country in January since it's clear that long distance is hard for both of us. He broke up with me a few hours later for other reasons (we're at different places in life, I can't be the boyfriend you want, etc). When I asked him to really consider it, he said that it would be better if we separated. I left, and later that week when I went out to the club I saw him and he was glaring at me the whole time (even though he broke up with me?!) and apparently has been watching all my friends' social media (I removed him from mine).

I will add that he has a very traumatic history of abandonment and therefore fear of it (Moon-Pluto conj natally). He has told me that it's hard for him to get attached but once he does get attached and really love someone, it's hard for him to detach himself. Please no comments about how this guy is bad for me because I know lol... a part of me also likes the games.

Do you think he's serious about the breakup this time or is this another Scorpio Mars test to get me to beg for him back again?

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posted November 03, 2022 02:48 PM            

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Originally posted by AnnabelLucy:
Astrology might help you understand what these wounds might be (look at Chiron, SN and other karmic asteroids for clues), but ultimately you guys have to do the work, astrology isn't the cure.

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Ooh could you tell me more about this? He has Mars (Scorp 21 deg), Chiron (Scorp 27 deg), Moon (Sag 6 deg), and Pluto (Sag 7 deg) all conjunct closely in his 3rd house. My Chiron and Vertex (Scorp 18 deg) conjuncts his Mars as well as my Pluto conjuncts his Moon/Pluto.

posted November 03, 2022 05:11 PM            

So... Firstly, this sounds like a very Plutonic relationship in general. Strong Pluto contacts always cause obsession and fixation in the Pluto person, which is both of you in this case (you're drawn into his Moon via your Pluto and he is a Plutonic person in general and prone to these kind of relationships - which is likely one of his things to overcome in this lifetime because that stuff is a hard cross to bear and needs a lot of self-control and disciplined healthy coping to overcome). I suggest you research Plutonic relationships because they are notoriously difficult, tumultuous and, oftentimes, outright toxic (because it's all about power and possession). This is even more relevant in your case as you both have the same theme of wounding (Chiron - Scorpio). Scorpio is THE Plutonic sign, to make matters worse, but it's themes extend to pretty heavy stuff that, when unevolved and in the shadow of the psyche, can wreak havoc in one's life and relationships. I also suggest you look up Chiron in Scorpio for yourself, and Chiron in whichever house it is in in your chart. This will help you see what lessons this encounter has been trying to teach you, because it is NOT about love and healthy relating (Libra) when Pluto/Scorpio/8th House is involved: it's deeper and darker than that. Don't romanticise the agony, face it for what it is instead.

Aside from this relationship, it is all the more important for you that you do look into your own Chiron, because of the conjunction you mention between Chiron and Vertex in your own natal chart (I have the same conjunction in my chart). It suggests to me that the people that come into your live via this Vertex point (i.e. all fated meetings) are set to trigger your wounding (you, like me, must be having a lifetime that is largely about addressing your underlying pain via significant relationships - a self-development, healing crash-course, so to speak). So, unless you dive in and look at your own "stuff", whether it is with this guy or the next, the same themes will come up until you work to manage and heal them. Think of this Chiron/Vertex placement as a point in your chart of karma or lessons that this life is determined for you to learn and grow from, and each new relationship will be another test to see how far you've come and how well you're developing.

Going back to the relationship at hand... It seems that you two were meant to come into each other's life to bring about some deep lessons. Look at the themes of the sign and (especially) house of your NN to get more of a picture, but it suggests that he has some karmic duty to help you move forwards towards your destiny in this life via the things this relationship has been trying to teach you. The SN contact with those two Air planets suggests he has past life karma (if you believe in such things) regarding your freedom, individuality and expression of self. Likely the reason you two have been through a possessive and obsessive dynamic in this life is to replay themes around these two extremes (total freedom and utter enmeshment) until the karma is rebalanced between the two of you and the individual soul has integrated the lessons and moved on.

In my opinion, I think this definitely a "move on" situation. This guy's Mars coming in on your "fated wounding" point suggests that it was never meant to be an easy one and will take a LOT of self-improvement from both of you in order to make any kind of relationship work. Obsession, cycles of push-ad-pull, spite, destructive behaviour, hysteria, possession, outrage, narcissism and even cruelty/abuse/violence are just some of the things that you two can trigger in each other (all the shadow sides of a Plutonian-Martian-Lunar mix hitting you both in your deepest, most painful areas).

Get out there and do some research, firstly into Plutonian relationships, secondly into your Chiron placement and thirdly into your own chart at large (and your psychology and attachment style etc) and I think you'll see why destiny put you into this situation and what it wanted you to learn so your future with other people can be better and more evolved

Hope this helped.

posted November 03, 2022 06:09 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by tineyin:
My ex-boyfriend (Leo/Sag/Virgo, Leo Venus, Scorpio Mars) and I (Aqua/Virgo/Gem, Cap Venus, Pisces Mars) started off dating in person 6 months ago and we had started doing long distance a month ago. Two weeks ago, I had broken up with him for something bad he did and then he broke up with me the day after, stating he didn't remember me breaking up with him (he "was drunk"). After 3 hours of me pleading and finally leaving his apartment, he chased after me and agreed to give it another chance.

Last week when I went to visit him, I suggested we take a break for a month when I'm out of the country in January since it's clear that long distance is hard for both of us. He broke up with me a few hours later for other reasons (we're at different places in life, I can't be the boyfriend you want, etc). When I asked him to really consider it, he said that it would be better if we separated. I left, and later that week when I went out to the club I saw him and he was glaring at me the whole time (even though he broke up with me?!) and apparently has been watching all my friends' social media (I removed him from mine).

I will add that he has a very traumatic history of abandonment and therefore fear of it (Moon-Pluto conj natally). He has told me that it's hard for him to get attached but once he does get attached and really love someone, it's hard for him to detach himself. Please no comments about how this guy is bad for me because I know lol... a part of me also likes the games.

Do you think he's serious about the breakup this time or is this another Scorpio Mars test to get me to beg for him back again?

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posted November 03, 2022 07:43 PM            

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Originally posted by rockwell:
Mars in Scorpio H A T E S being in the inferior/weaker position and and they will do everything to avoid it - even lie.

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Excuse me very much but many of us Mars in Scorpio people are brave and secure enough to admit feeling inferior and weak at times, and (regardless of how hard that feels internally) still practice humility, nobility of character and allow ourselves to be appropriately vulnerable. Don't be calling us all liars in an attack of bitterness towards your ex, lets use these threads to discuss actual astrological theory in a mature fashion.

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Originally posted by rockwell:
Mars in Scorpio's ideal relationship would be a partner who loves them more than they do, while Mars in Scorpio is in control of the course of events.

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Generalisation and, again, not even true. I (a Mars in Scorpio) want an EQUAL partnership with someone as passionate and tenaciously loving as me: a counterpart. Weakness and servility in love is totally unattractive to me. Having control is boring; mutual respect and strength of character is hot as hell (think power couple, Divine feminine/masculine etc)! Seriously, I couldn't think of anything worse than someone who didn't challenge me, match my energy, have their own opinions and internal fire. This power dynamic stuff you're talking about is far more in the realms of (unevolved) Pluto and BML. Mars is about competition more than control (and for that matter, I'm Pluto Scorpio and BML Capricorn - all about control and dominance, and yet bc of my Mars placement I would be bored to death in a relationship with an unbalanced dynamic). Mars is masculine energy - valour, the chase, chivalry - Mars loves fiercely and can quite easily fall into positions of loving and defending someone more than they receive back, the other way round is not a natural state to them.

quote:

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Originally posted by rockwell:
Mars and Moon in Scorpio's worst nightmare is rejection (for example: a sudden break up) and when things happen unexpectedly over which they have no control... They love to play mind games. It's her way of flirting and testing the water.

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Firstly, my way of flirting isn't to psychologically abuse someone, idk about your ex but... no. Again, you're speaking about Plutonian qualities, not Martian.

Secondly, rejection hurts everyone, some placements more than others. But this doesn't automatically give rise to negative behaviour. People with unaddressed, underlying trauma may want to engage in stuff like that but if you base your entire opinion of Mars in Scorpio people off your experience of one of the unhealed ones you can't expect anyone on this site to take you seriously. I will not defend the actions of your or OP's ex's, but I will defend Mars in Scorpio to the extreme. Not just because I have the placement, but because some of the most deeply loving, courageous, wise, determined and strong people I know have it, people who have been through hell (in love and in general) and have kept going without lowering themselves to spiteful, underhand actions and never lost faith, no matter how many times it has been challenged. Also, I am all about using astrology as a tool for spiritual evolution, not discriminatory condemnation. We're all a mix of good and bad. Don't be hating on one sign or another (it often means you have repressed shadow aspects of that sign/placement/aspect when you do, so should look to yourself).

posted November 29, 2022 06:16 PM            

I met this guy at work last Spring, he was very forward about his attraction to me. I was still with my ex back then, so I ignored him and his efforts, but he definitely was not playing games and would use every opportunity even in front of others to flirt and ask me out or just hang out. We both even received warning from our audit department to minimize personal interactions during work. Despite both of us having two of the best consistentaly performance results. I guess other people had reported us. Particularly this accountant girl whom I helped get hired, but later she was always googly eyes around him (they had the most intense composite chart I have ever seen even to this date).

Later I decided I had to leave the firm for both a better job offer, and also the fact that I felt like I was gonna crack under his love spell, I didn't want to break up with my then-bf and also didn't want to start an affair. I had grown to like him too, but luckily I found out he was born in the 2000s, and was much younger than me! It certainly made my transition from that firm easier, because it was such a well paid yet extremely fun job, and it would have been somewhat difficult if I hadn't found out the he was a kid practically. He certainly acted more mature. He would even boss around his coworkers who were men in their 40s!

His other placements: aqua venus, capricorn sun and moon and merc. no idea what his AC was.