posted May 30, 2023 10:48 AM            

I've met this woman in January 2022 while I was making a food sale, I couldn't help but to be kinda amazed that a very beautiful woman took notice of me, and we exchanged numbers. After a while, she told me that she's in a long term relationship with a woman 20 years older, unexpected as it was, I decided to distance myself from her, but somehow she was the first woman in quite a while to find a way to get close to me in a way that wasn't annoying, poking at social media every once in a while, and being in the same social gatherings kinda made me open to a friendship with her. Even if she sometimes was kinda flirty, I couldn't help but to feel her attraction towards me, but I ignored that because of her relationship - I never would be with anyone while being in a relationship., And I kept her bay for quite a while.

As time went by, she became my friend and confidant on many things, including my difficulties with women, with my family, but most importantly, the connection with the pisces woman that put me off the rails, and I ended up showing my music, poems, etc. She was, and is very helpful also with spiritual things, and because of this libra woman's recomendation I started to do kundalini yoga, as a way to reconnect with myself and to help me to be more calmed with the pisces woman. I felt a level of trust I don't usually have with women, I felt very comfortable being my sometimes intense and brooding me, she was very much empathetic with me. Being a psychologist that's into spirituality and the arts also helps a lot.

She told me not long ago that her partner would be on a long journey for 6 months and that they would be on a break basically,and Just this last saturday, we met again at one of the cultural centers of my city and finally, I reciprocated her, and we ended up having sex at my place. She's the first friend, and the first woman that has entered my bedroom ever, because of my conservative family and because I never quite connected quite deep enough with anyone to invite to my place.

And after 12 hours later she texted me she wanted more sex, and we ended up going in a motel, straight to the point, no holds barred.

She told me to keep it a secret though, for "respect" to her partner, and to avoid unnecessary gossip. Even though she had permission to date other people, she decided to keep our affair as hidden as possible for the moment.

It feels kinda different to have sex with someone that you have a friendship, a connection rather than having it with someone you just met for the first time(it's what usually happens to me), and I'm feeling strange, like I'm way out of my comfort zone, and I'm not sure how to deal with this, I know that she's been very helpful and kind to me in many ways, and with this affair I believe I'm going to learn many things about love and sex, things that will help me, when the time comes, to finally be more ready to open my heart, or that's what I think I guess.

And here are the charts

posted June 08, 2023 09:17 PM            

This may be a temporary adventure, but I hope our friendship remains after this, she has been quite important in my life in so many ways.

posted June 09, 2023 11:44 AM            

But yeah, the Venus sq. Neptune and the 12th house NN and moon composite are quite difficult.

And the fact that most of the times she has a very unpredictable behavior, cancelling dates at the last second, leaving me very confused.

posted June 10, 2023 10:39 AM            

We told each other our feelings, but she wants an open thing, no strings attached, And I agreed. This experience is amazing, maybe it won't be a couple thing, but I'm considering this as a rehearsal for the future.

posted June 27, 2023 11:56 AM            

I consider her my soulmate, but she won't be my lifetime partner because of her being non-monogamous, still I can't deny her part in my life, the healing she does for me in a very compassionate way, and the only reason why I'm in this open relationship is because in a very deep way, I trust her. I can trust her to guide me to learn as much as I can when it comes to reciprocal connections, and I know that I have a friend for a lifetime. I'm in an exciting adventure.

posted July 04, 2023 11:36 AM            

And also we had shared a lot in these past few days, Having dinner with her friends and in her place, felt so great to be a part of her life and to know a bit more of her, how she has built her life in an orderly way, to keep her hyperactivity on check with many activities as possible.

Probably the only thing that sucks is that she put the hard boundaries as I'm undeniably falling in love, she's still with her partner even if they're on a break, she has sex with other men as well, and she recommended me to have experiences with other women as to not be focused on her only.

In many ways she's the kind of woman that I'd built a life with, she has many things that I love in a woman, beauty, intelligence, sensitivity, someone I can learn, to be challenged, to have fun, to make love intensely. She does love me though, and she also doesn't deny that our connection is deep and special, it just isn't made for a monogamous relationship.

posted August 15, 2023 11:20 AM            

To talk about synastry, our 12th house moon composite really makes it important to have time for each other alone, I feel much more comfortable with her when we're on our own, I'm still kinda awkward in public, though she's a bit more comfortable being affectionate in public, also the venus-sun/mars/pluto conjunction really puts in perspective that the relationship deepens and gets more intimate after we have sex. Almost an entire day with her and not a single boring moment.

For the life I have before, She has made a huge impact on me. What was very difficult when it comes with women, she made it very easy, and pleasant, I never felt as good with anyone as I'm now with her, I can say it's very therapeutic for my soul growth, And now seeing her showing me her own personal writings has made me very happy and proud on how I can inspire someone to emotionally express with art, on how I can make someone happy, loved, cared.

posted September 02, 2023 11:29 AM            

As her partner is coming soon, she also must deal with all she has in her life, all these affairs and adventures, the open relationship thing, she was starting to feel the longing, but also the difficulty to deal with many people.

And I don't know if I'm going to have something so good like this, having this level of comfort with a woman as I had with her, I don't want to put myself out there yet, it stinks that she just ghosted me, but alas, she has too much **** going on, and I can't blame her.

This was my first relationship, my first true foray into love, and I'm proud of myself of handling something very difficult with such grace, kindness and love. I did my best, It was good, I don't regret it.