posted April 27, 2005 07:39 AM         

I will explain myS-elf.

I was a strict veggie for a year or more and involved with animal rights. At around the same time I was getting into all this, I met a man who I am still with, who, unfortunately eats meat. At first I thought that as he loves animals, I would one day be able to convert him.

Unfortunately, this was not so. He's very stubborn & can't be bothered with it. Plus he thinks it's not natural not to eat some meat. Plus he doesn't really like anything else. I've tried, for so long, to subtley sway him over to my beliefs. Even though he's sensitive, I have been unsuccessful. The same goes for family. People won't change unless they want to.

Vegans use to ask me how I could be with a meat-eater. I wondered too. However, the bond is so powerful, I have not been able to shake it off.

I left the group I was involved with. I didn't see their approach as ever truely acchieving anything. It saddens me, and I know exactly what they would think of me now, but I have to think for myS-elf. And it certainly isn't often possible to telepathically get One's feelings accross so people may empathize!

I have read Star Signs and the section on immortality.

However, I have ended up being the one to compromise. It's an Arwen/Aargon situation. (LOL- Lord of the Rings- I know- I'm a nutcase!). I fell in love with a mortal man; I chose a mortal life. I no longer avoid all animal products, though I would again if I met a who did (I'm not altogether proud of it). I occasionally eat organic fish/chicken and small amounts of dairy, though I have bought some knew vegan cookery books and fully intend to fight with delicious food once I have mastered them!

Is it possible to find harmony within yourS-elf, as a veggie, with the world around you, or do you find it builds up inner resentment?

I have been a vegan ,but at the same time I can't help admire native cultures who do eat meat, but at the same time respect all creatures and the Earth.

I guess I may forever be at odds with all things.

posted April 27, 2005 11:21 PM         

I've been in a similar situation to yours before. I'm a lacto-vegetarian and i fell in love with a guy who happens to eat meat. I've been vegetarian all my life, and always thought i'd end up with one too; perhaps it was a naive thought. I fell in love with him for who he is, and how he makes me feel. He brings out the best in me, and is the sweetest, most thoughtful guy I've ever met.

People have reminded me of this issue time & time again, and it bothered me. He & i have talked about it, and he's said that he's willing to compromise because he loves me. Though he never said he'd leave it off completely, he's told me that when we're together, and i'm cooking vegetarian stuff, that's what he'll have. He further said he'd never pressure me to change.

We've had some turmoil in our relationship - times when we've been apart, and during these times apart, looking at the big picture, I've come to realize that I'd rather be with him than without. Faced with this choice, the diet issue faded for me. I know that it'll certainly come up when we do get back together, because i feel quite strongly about it. (I've always hoped that he'd leave it off by himself, of his own choice, without me having to ask him - i'd hate to have to).

Anyhow, i just wanted to suggest to you to listen to your heart about this. Do you feel strongly enough about this issue to decide to not pursue a relationship with someone who won't understand? Or, do you feel strongly enough about him, that you can see yourself being ok with him continuing as he is? Can you imagine a life without him? I couldn't, and this is one of the reasons i realized that my love is very possibly my Twin Soul/Soulmate, despite our differences. Our souls have seemed to fit together... and hopefully he can be brought around by love, on this issue. Just some food for thought...

posted May 01, 2005 06:21 AM         

This diet issue is tough, as it does mean a lot to me no matter what others may think. I don't take matters like this lightly! Boy have I done a lot of thinking in my life! But that also makes the head rather heavy. After that, all one needs is a good giggle!

I think part of the problem is that I can't have faith (or 'KNOW' as Linda would have it) in something 100% without THE EVIDENCE.

The answers to my question actually came to me straight after typing up this topic. The fact that I'm not 100% sure (though I am very persuaded) in the teachings of Star Signs and Immortality, this is the real source of the dilemma.

I will continue to look for the answers. Meanwhile, I will try to follow the steps in the book (I've never really done this properly, step by step). Just because others around me are eating meat, doesn't mean I have to. I can cook what I have to cook separately.

No-one can be made to go vegetarian unless it is something they feel inside too.

It'll work out between you two, Sunshine9, if you both want it to. You do seem to have a powerful bond, from what you were describing. You can't force him to be vegetarian, though. He has to believe it from within. And we all have our own beliefs, don't we? The world of beliefs is a dense jungle!

posted May 11, 2005 01:15 AM         

How's it going with your man? Were you able to make a decision and figure out how you'll handle things?

~nae, i liked what you said - sounds like a sweet bond you two share. Being able to accept each other with all these imperfections or quirks is what makes a relationship truly special. I hope i'm able to achieve that with my love when we're back together; I think we should be able to, as we've done, with other issues.

posted May 13, 2005 12:48 AM         

To LostInStrangeWorld,
I hope everything's going well. Reading over my post, i realise now it's not immediately clear what my point is. I wanted to tell you not to sacrifice your beliefs - you said you had begun eating meat again to make your boyfriend happy - don't! You're giving your power away to him. Think about it, if he knows he can make you change that aspect of yourself he will start making more demands on you fully expecting you to change for him. You will feel emotionally blackmailed and, more importantly, you'll lose touch with yourself b/c you're not in tune with your own needs.

Sunshine,
If you want things to work out, they will - goodluck!