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juniperb
Moderator

Posts: 9789
From: Blue Star Kachina
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 15, 2003 05:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for juniperb     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is good for a

A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He
took his faithful pet dachshund along for company. One

day, the dachshund starts chasing butterflies and
before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost.

Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly
in his direction with the obvious intention of having
lunch. The dachshund thinks, "I'm in deep trouble
now!" Then he notices some bones on the ground close
by and immediately settles down to chew on the bones
with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dachshund
exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard.

I wonder if there are any more around here?" Hearing
this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride as a
look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into
the trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was close.
That dachshund nearly had me."

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole
scene from a nearby tree figures he can put this
knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from

the leopard. So, off he goes But the dachshund saw him

heading after the leopard with great speed, and
figured that something must be up.

The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills
the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the
leopard The leopard is furious at being made a fool of

and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's
going to happen to that conniving canine."

Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming with the
monkey on his back and thinks "What am I going to do
now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with
his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen
them yet...and just when they get close enough to hear

the dachshund says:
"Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off half an hour

ago to bring me another leopard."

REMEMBER:
IF YOU CAN'T DAZZLE THEM WITH BRILLIANCE,
BAFFLE THEM WITH BUL***IT !!

juniperb



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purplezen
unregistered
posted October 15, 2003 06:01 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That was cute. I love dachsunds!!!

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Ika
unregistered
posted October 15, 2003 06:02 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Haha that was great

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Ika
unregistered
posted October 15, 2003 06:10 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Darn Crazy Kids

A young punk gets on a bus and sits down in directly across from an old man.
The young punk has spiked green, purple and orange hair. His clothing is a tattered mix of leather rags. His entire face and body are covered with piercings and his earrings are big, bright red, yellow and green feathers.

The old man stares at the young punk as the bus travels across the city.

Finally, the punk looks across at the old man, and yells, "What are you looking at, old man! Didn't you do anything wild when you were young?"

Without missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah. Back when I was very young and in the Navy, I got really drunk in Singapore and had sex with a parrot... I thought you might be my son."

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pidaua
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 15, 2003 06:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
hee hee, that is too funny. Both of them!!


I love weeeeeeeeeeeeniedogs

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juniperb
Moderator

Posts: 9789
From: Blue Star Kachina
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 15, 2003 07:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for juniperb     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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pixelpixie
Knowflake

Posts: 474
From: ON Canada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 16, 2003 02:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for pixelpixie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
both made my night!!!

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juniperb
Moderator

Posts: 9789
From: Blue Star Kachina
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 12, 2015 08:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for juniperb     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

------------------
Christian, Jew, Muslim, Shaman, Zoroastrian, stone, ground, mountain, river, each has a secret way of being with the Mystery, unique and not to be judged.
Rumi

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 71990
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 13, 2015 12:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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juniperb
Moderator

Posts: 9789
From: Blue Star Kachina
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 31, 2016 02:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for juniperb     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

------------------
Partial truth~the seeds of wisdom~can be found in many places...The seeds of wisdom are contained in all scriptures ever written… especially in art, music, and poetry and, above all, in Nature.

Linda Goodman

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 71990
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 04, 2016 08:13 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I always knew weenie dogs were smart!

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 71990
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 05, 2016 11:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 71990
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 06, 2016 08:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And cunning.

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 71990
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 11, 2016 01:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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