posted April 20, 2004 04:03 PM           

Who, what..I don't know, doesn't know. Head clears to a point and the CD is skipped forward to track 9. The music begins and the words are heard that have always been there...waiting to be sung. They have been sung.

How to describe that which defies description? A feeling, a needing...a longing. There is a want inside that grows with each passing day. A yearning to return to the arms of the Beloved. Yet the want itself is antithetical to that return. The want betrays its owner, leaves the dream behind and fills these eyes with tears.

It's so damned frustrating! Can't this me just GO AWAY so that we can be together again? Can't I just melt away into Oneness again? Where is that place and why is it so hard to find it this time? The path is known, the steps have been taken and yet...and yet.

How to describe a feeling which defies description? The lyrics flow on..soul inciting, fire that burns comes burning through and yet...

"Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again
Whenever I'm alone with you.."

More enticement to torture this poor soul.. Who suggested immortality again? This life is a blessing, yet this body is a trap for something that once existed without it. Who suggested immortality again? Who suggested the quest when the goal lies in the opposite direction? Who?

However to describe an instinctive desire which defies description? However indeed! The music plays on in answer to my pleas.

"However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you.."

How much love is left remains to be seen, but the answer lies between each heartbeat, each drum beat. There is a knowledge there sung from the soul..echoes of some primal cry..

How to describe that which defies description? Perhaps it is only best described by raising one's voice in song.

Love Song
the Cure

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again

However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you

daf