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Author
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Topic: Dis-conection
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DeepIYM
Knowflake Posts: 355
From: Colorful Colorado
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted June 09, 2004 12:54 AM
 
Hmmm.I can't seem to figure it out... I'm in a funk, and I can't seem to find my way out... I can not, I repeat, can not connect to the people around me... I'm in pain because of this. I don't know where to go, but I will see if any of you have some advice. My disconnection to my self, my soul, my heart, is it socially incapacitating. I'm a wonderful person inside, deep inside, I'm good looking, compassionate, fun loving, good sense of humor. I have none of this with my dis-connection. Oh and I'm in love with this girl, but I don't fell like I can do anything about it, I can't connect. do any of you have similar problems. I have been trying to find out what it is that causes this disruption in my personality. That is my call to the universe. The universe is putting this on me for a reason, If only I could figure it out. with love and hope:
Randall III
IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Knowflake Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 09, 2004 01:43 AM
Of course you are all those things. Disconnection is not absolute, it is not final, you will come beyond this with a new perception and a new belief in yourself, when you can once again connect with someone.. be it that woman or another. Or just yourself.
Keep in mind the current retrograde of Venus, maybe that will offer some solace, or at least an explanation. From what I have read.. it expresses just what you are expressing. Love to you.
Take care. IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Knowflake Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 09, 2004 01:45 AM
We haven't really communicated before, though I have seen your name....
What moves you? What do you love?
What are your signs?
Etc...IP: Logged |
Special
Knowflake Posts: 421
From: Another timezone
Registered: May 2004
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posted June 09, 2004 06:56 AM
I have felt like that alot recently since one thing after the other seems to challenge me. I do receive kind gestures from people, mainly strangers or aqaintances actually which sometimes make things more bearable.I considered posting something similar on Monday since one comment at work sent me into tears (obviously amoungst other things) I'm fighting this rising anger sometimes which clouds my instincts on so many things. I too know I'm a wonderful person too deep down but need to sort through so much it's painful to do so. DeepIYM, I wish you the best in luck for clarity and feel for you  It's good you know it won't last forever - like it's a universal trial! But hey, we all need a little white light sometimes
With love  ------------------
29th November
Sun: Sagittarius
Moon: Cancer
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Leo.. and the rest will leave a mighty long signature! IP: Logged |
Special
Knowflake Posts: 421
From: Another timezone
Registered: May 2004
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posted June 09, 2004 12:26 PM
Pixie, I love how wise you are!You seem to drawn to people who need help too.. methinks you're an excellent counsellor. What are your signs?  ------------------
29th November
Sun: Sagittarius
Moon: Cancer
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Leo.. and the rest will leave a mighty long signature! IP: Logged |
Philbird
Knowflake Posts: 3396
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted June 09, 2004 12:40 PM
Sometimes we become disconnected when we are under a lot of stress. The brain can handle only so much info at one time. Do your thoughts swirl around in your head to the point you feel like you can't think at all? Like a blank slate? Let me know if I'm close, because I may have some suggestions.
Take care of your bodily needs first.IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 09, 2004 01:26 PM
DeepIYM, Sometimes one Just needs to pull back the reins and take alittle time for the s-elf to be alone and do some inner homework. Just watch how others are responding to you. There has been many times when I have been in the same kind of place in life and things and people just don't go together right. I would feel like a outsider looking in and when I did try to say something or play apart,It seemed as if I was further away. So now I take it as a time to pull back and allow mys-elf to just reflect on such matters of the heart. Sometimes it's just a lesson on learning to just be and not always doing. (RUNE) STAND STILL!!! Life may have a funny way of trying to tell us sometimes that we may just need sometime alone to truly reflect who we really are and how we fit into the grand scheme of things. Time is always changing and the wheel of life always moving, your not really every alone. Sounds like you have a big heart and may just need to give alittle of that to yours-elf and you will have refilled your cup and have more of that flow to give to others when the time comes. Love and Peace My Friend I Feel Your Heart!!!
Solane Star 
IP: Logged |
trillian
Knowflake Posts: 4050
From: The Boundless
Registered: Mar 2003
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posted June 09, 2004 01:44 PM
Deep,
You have friends here.
Like pixie said, why don't you tell us about yourself? And you too, Special.As you've already heard from the kind and wise souls here, sometimes you just need a little time inward. Honestly, most of us have felt the same from time to time. And I would bet that Linda didn't always 'fit in.' The girl with whom you are in love, does she know it? Why can't you do anything about it? All of this will pass...talk to us.  IP: Logged |
pidaua
Knowflake Posts: 7314
From: Schweinfurt to Grafenwoehr all within 6 months LOL
Registered: May 2002
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posted June 09, 2004 01:45 PM
This may also be an emotionally difficult time with Venus in retrograde. While she is sleeping our feelings seem to be vague or "disconnected". We feel out of touch with love around us or we cannot quite get what we feel out in the open. I would think this would be especially true for anyone that has a Venus rising, Venus in the first house or is ruled by Venus (Taurus or Libra).
DeepIYM, how long have you felt like this?
IP: Logged |
Philbird
Knowflake Posts: 3396
From: Here, there and everywhere.
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted June 09, 2004 03:04 PM
This posted, how come the other didn't? Over an hour agoIP: Logged |
DeepIYM
Knowflake Posts: 355
From: Colorful Colorado
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted June 09, 2004 03:08 PM
I am so glad to hear many kind souls respond to my call... Me's a Pisces. Figures, don't it. PixelPixie, I am moved by love, when I find such energy, I am on top of things, like I know everyone’s next move, I can even tell them who they are, what they are to become, who they were, maybe not specifically but I can feel them. Having a Pisces in mercury helps. I'm very sensitive and intuitive. I am an artist, I love photography and writing. I'm also getting in to drama. I have a lot going for me. Pidaua asked how long it's been sence I've had this spell, like forever. As long as I can remember. I feel alienated by my peers, I have a hard time letting lose and talking about things that are just fun. I can’t connect to me, my fun side. Except on rare occasions on which my personality comes out and people are just drawn… that’s when I’m reading my poetry, people are moved. That’s when If I was in that mood, that girl would melt by my charm. Grrr… But, I can’t seem to find myself. I don’t think I’d mind this state so much if I could at least connect to that girl. Negative energy is the worst, it consumes you. If only I could bring out the positive.
Randall III
PixelPixie tell me about yourself. You are a moderator, so you are here often. What’s your sign? Your life? Where do you live and why? I live in Colorado, but I would like to move to Oregon because it is more wet there. We are in the middle of a drought here, but we had some flash floods here last night, me and my mom were driving through 9 inches of water. Yikes.
IP: Logged |
DeepIYM
Knowflake Posts: 355
From: Colorful Colorado
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted June 09, 2004 03:11 PM
Truely I am so glad to have heard from all of you guys and gals. I thank you from the bottom of me heart. It is nice to have a community such as this. I feel very welcome here. All of you have reinforced that good feeling.Randall III IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Knowflake Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 09, 2004 03:45 PM
Hey Deeply~
I am actually not a moderator, just being a fellow water sign ( Scorpio) I get sucked into things, and love feeding the energy and feeling it radiate. Sometimes with love, sometimes with humour, sometimes with defensiveness... so I am here alot. It is my favorite past time, and I have alot of interests.
Sounds to me, by your intensity and romanticism, we'd get along quite well. I'd love for you to share your poetry, why don't you come by and visit ~For Yellow Wax and the Ants?~ If you'd like to share, I'd be very receptive to hear.
It seems to me that people with water in their charts learn to live with their deepness, and by your name, you are aware of this part of you. It kinda sucks sometimes to feel so passionately about things when everyone else seems to be swimming in shallow waters. But the thing is, we are all different.... The person fixated on shallow things could be wearing a mask to hide how they really feel.... you never know. We just don't wear ours as discreetly.
Maybe sometimes, huh?
I know you feel you need to focus and channel that love onto a deserving person. You want to nurture and share, and it is frustrating when you see so much into souls, without reciprocation. I promise it will come. If you are desirous enough and good in your soul and heart and intentions, it will come.
Are you in school, fellow artist?IP: Logged |
Special
Knowflake Posts: 421
From: Another timezone
Registered: May 2004
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posted June 10, 2004 05:24 AM
Deep, I'm pleased you've felt better.. trillian is right, you have friends here and I knew the knowflakes would rally round as I said in Health and Healing. trillian, thanks for being welcoming. I had a conversation last night with an aquaintance that's becomming a friend, and really helped getting things in perspective with me, so feel alot better myself already. A little bit about me; I 'grew up' and live in England. I love music and cars! I love poetry and art too. The music I like is mainly hiphop, I love the way lyrics are incorporated with a melody - and some lyrics are amazing. I am open to all music, however and love a classic; whether it be Dire Straits, or Ray Charles! I keep my mind open enough so my brain doesn't fall out and I love learning about life. There is more but this is Deep's thread, my issues are on a real fast rollercoaster of ups and downs at the mo and I'm sure that those of you in contact will know me better eventually anyway. Deep, in relation to what pixie, trillian, Philbird, Solane Star and pidaua said, just wondering how you're doing since I don't know much about you ------------------
29th November
Sun: Sagittarius
Moon: Cancer
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Leo.. and the rest will leave a mighty long signature! IP: Logged |
DeepIYM
Knowflake Posts: 355
From: Colorful Colorado
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted June 10, 2004 11:51 PM
Would you like to know about me? Well there's a lot. I live in Denver, with my father. I go to a public school 11 miles away(for god knows why) I love to see people, I go down town and people watch for hours and then I head over to the Mercury cafe, A Virgo inspired restaurant with a 60's vibe. I read poetry there on Fridays until about 2 in the morning and then Ride my bike home. The only reason why I can ride my bike home at 2 in the morning is cuz I have myself a great angel. I am a photographer, I have been a little dis passionate lately about it because I haven't quite had the means to get my work into play. As I was say earlier. I love to watch people. So I'll head down to the 16th street mall where I take pictures of all the interesting characters. I am a social photographer. I love to meet people, usually at least. That is why I'm down, cuz I feel withdrawn and that gets me down. A the interesting things I've had to say have kinda gone away. Why? Cuz I haven't believed in myself for a while... I hope god gives them back. My perspective, the thing that made me so interesting, at least to my self. it's dormant. I hope to god it'll come back.
just so you know what I mean I'll put a poem here.Around the corner,
Down the Shaft,
Through the bend of a
Dark, sullen, condemned tunnel,
Through a rock
And up a few feet:
There is hope.
The tunnel Caves in,
Little hope is left.
Take it in, and let it grow.
Go exploring, Dig a little too.
Because the other side of the darkness.
The other side is light.
Just keep your heart close,
And your brain turned on.
The wise are deeply light hearted and Vigilant. IP: Logged |
Special
Knowflake Posts: 421
From: Another timezone
Registered: May 2004
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posted June 11, 2004 04:52 AM
Fantastic  To the point, succint and makes perfect sense! Did you write the poem, Deep? Regardless, "The wise are deeply light hearted and Vigilant".. brilliant The Virgo inspired restaurant sounds cool, Mercury Cafe.. no wonder you retreat there for clarity sometimes  I grew up with my father too, I was quite a loner as a child, but liked it that way since I never seemed to fit in. I guess I was brought up with different rules to regular society. In that process, I learnt about what I liked. When I was 'older' and could drive, I went to Newlands Corner, in a beautiful part of Surrey, read and contemplated. Sometimes when I was heart broken I'd write, and I'd write best there. I know what you meant about feeling dispassionate, even with an art you love, but distance is good sometimes since you come back more alive! Do you have any of your photo's you could send me digitally? I'd love to see your photos  If you decide to, mail me at chiligirlthefirst@yahoo.co.uk Wish I had more time to think and write more - at work at the mo and keep getting distracted, so hope you get the feel of what I'm saying if it seems 'bitty'. Oh, what are your signs by the way? Glad you acknowledge your angel; I have a great angel too ------------------
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world" Gandhi IP: Logged | |
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