posted May 18, 2005 02:25 PM         

Well, what's happy? I said. Most people can't honestly say they're truly happy, those that pretend aren't necessarily truly happy, they only put on a cheerful face. Truth of the matter is, I don't feel happy or unhappy, and I guess that's the way it wraps up for most people.

Those sorts of questions/statements: are you happy? you don't seem happy - they are blanket statements. When people make those sorts of statements, I feel cut off from them strangely, "outside the box" as it were. They imply that we should be happy most of the time, if not, then there is somehow something wrong with us. Most of the time I'm probably not very happy. But who gives a toss?

Now I'm not implying here that one should wallow in one's misery. I have tried various counsellors, therapists etc. and as I have said before, they have an agenda and they try to fit you in a box. There came a point when I thought, I can deal with this on my own, I don't really need any outside help, I am strong enough. So there is also something to be said for "getting on with it", though the "put up and shut up" aspects that seem to be traditionally associated with that I don't buy either. (I reserve the right to rant, rave and ruminate!) When I think of "getting on with it" now I try to think of positive, affirmative action to remedy certain situations - when the time is right.

Expecting to be happy all the time is a false expectation; remarks such as "cheer up, it might never happen" go right over my head. I seem unhappy to other people a lot of the time, apparently. Actually, I'm not! Maybe I'm just used to the way I feel.

It doesn't matter if you're not happy, even if you think you should be! Although recognizing this and making plans to remedy the situation can make one feel a whole lot more POSITIVE. It's nice to try to achieve some level of satisfaction, but many of us ARE never, and are never going to BE satisfied, that is a fact, it is just our personalities. Some thrive on stability and others on upheaval; all I can say is know yourself, accept yourself.

Extreme emotions sometimes appear to be frowned on socially, I have a lot of those. Extreme euphoria and at the other end of the scale, "blue" periods. At the moment I'm in a "high", fairly aggressive phase, which might be counted as semi-euphoric.
Now some might classify this state of mind as slightly psychotic, but I have always had these extreme emotions even as a small child, I have learned to be nicer and more polite over the years but I lost some of my frankness in the process (which I now seem to be recovering, in a modified form). I sometimes wonder at society's condoning of a fairly bland level of exchange, but I suppose it has to exist, or civilisation wouldn't.
But you look at a lot of people who have achieved greatness - who had what some might call eccentricities and maybe psychoses. Were/are they happy? Who cares? Did/does it matter, in the larger scheme of things?

I can honestly say I am more comfortable with myself being able to own my emotions, to face them and cope with their intensity. I won't go so far as to say I "celebrate" them, but I view whatever "madness", if that's what you like to call it, that I experience as a positive force, because it drives my creativity, for one thing.

I'll share some words from a friend that really hit the nail on the head - simple truths that have over the past couple of weeks gradually made me feel better, and most importantly, stronger: "Concentrate on yourself, your work, and forget everything around it...Your drive should come from inside of you and not from what other people think."

LOL

AriesTiger

P.S. Are YOU happy???

posted May 18, 2005 03:20 PM         

Right BR?

posted May 18, 2005 03:29 PM         

What's good for you could be good for me, but there are lots of letters separating A and Z
Some are felt more pleasantly, some a friggin' emergency...
bottom line is clear I think
whats nice to me, to you might stink.

posted May 18, 2005 03:36 PM         

Eh, welcome back!

Not going to blame the transits. I had a LONG discussion with my astrologer during my solar return and he said a lot of what Pixie says too about movements and growth. There is a lot of Fire & Water in my chart, along with Cardinal and Mutable energies.

It's life. And if I didn't feel what I feel, then I wouldn't be able to connect with a lot of what goes on our planet and with our humanity.

posted May 18, 2005 04:45 PM         

And before I lay me down to sleep, I'd like to explode another myth...

"People only like smiley, happy people (read Shiny Happy People??). People don't like miserable people. Nobody likes a moper. Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry alone."

Right?

WRONG!!!!!

It is totally, totally untrue! Sometimes you like difficult people even more BECAUSE of their difficulties, and are refreshed by their lack of pretence.
REAL people, people that truly matter, will make allowances for frames of mind. I have been contemplating just how even more fed-up it makes one feel when people discount this fact. What are they trying to prove??

And how can they tell what's on the inside? (Do they need to know?) There is so much that one cannot put into words, believe me, my words are only the tip of the iceberg!

Aphrodite - Are you a '74 baby too, by any chance?
My chart's cleanly divided into thirds of Fire, Water and Air, with an Earth Ascendant. Cardinal/Mutable influence likewise.

Pixie

LOL

AT

posted May 18, 2005 06:31 PM         

May be you could incorporate these breakthroughs in your art? Just a thought. Auguste Rodin is my favorite sculptor. He put into visible form intimate human emotions and desire. I love his sculpture of "Eve" and what he said about it. I bought an art monograph of his life's work over the weekend so I can take a look at the whole picture of what Rodin was all about. He does go through the unhappiness in things that are written on this thread. Have you been to Paris yet? His museum is there. Great place for art. Just a short train ride from the UK on the EuroStar.

I was born in 1979, so a bit younger than you.

posted May 19, 2005 06:23 PM         

Good idea, about incorporating the ideas into my art. I am gathering tons of ideas at the moment, so that when I have finished the current project I'm working on, I'm raring to start afresh! I currently do mainly representative art, but want to create something with a bit more bite.

I shall have a look at Rodin's work in closer detail. I haven't been to his museum yet but I am trying to organise some sort of presence in London for later in the year, so Paris should be a stone's throw away from there.

posted May 19, 2005 08:20 PM         

I am content with life, I am happy at times...

The real definition for Happy is:

Characterized by good luck; fortunate.
Enjoying, showing, or marked by pleasure, satisfaction, or joy.
Being especially well-adapted; felicitous: a happy turn of phrase.
Cheerful; willing: happy to help.

Characterized by a spontaneous or obsessive inclination to use something. Often used in combination: trigger-happy.
Enthusiastic about or involved with to a disproportionate degree. Often used in combination: money-happy; clothes-happy.

Happy cannot be acheived ALL the time, but I am generally in a GOOD disposition. Not ALL day, but for the most part. I also try not to take my moods out on other people, it is not the tellers fault that I am feeling pi$$y.

Content:

Desiring no more than what one has; satisfied.
Ready to accept or acquiesce; willing: She was content to step down after four years as chief executive.

I vacillate between the two - and at times I just want to be left alone- to my own thoughts.

I don't think there are people that are happy 100% of the time nor do I think there are people that are angry 100% of the time.