Posts: 1061
From: Hopelessly lost........
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 14, 2005 05:37 PM         

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I have been experiencing an intense attraction towards my best friend (who happens to be of the same sex.) It's weird because I've never felt this way about anyone, let alone a female. I have been keeping it inside and while we have joked about it before and I think that she is bisexual, I am afraid to tell her because it might kill our friendship. I really love her and care about her and I don't want to hurt her but it's killing me to keep it to myself. She recently started seeing someone who she's really into and I just can't tell her now because it's a selfish thing to do. Coincidently - this guy's brother is really into me even though we just met but I feel nothing for him. He comes on too strong and there is a bad vibe I get from him. I regret not telling her sooner but I can't now and I might not ever be able to. I've heard things about her new bf like he's a "player" and a week ago before they started dating, his brother had said the guy liked me but we couldn't be together because I'm a virgin. Unfortunately, my friend seems to always find herself in abusive relationships. I love her with all my heart and I want her to know, but I really don't think I can tell her how I feel.

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Posts: 6034
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004

posted August 14, 2005 05:41 PM         

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Can you clearify...

Are you experiencing in love feelings for your friend... or are they simply bi-curious feelings?

If they're just bi-curious, I would suggest not mentioning it to your friend. Maybe someone else to explore that side of sexuality would be a better chioce.

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Posts: 1061
From: Hopelessly lost........
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 14, 2005 06:22 PM         

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It's not so much a sexual attraction - but it is there. I'm in love, and I just want to be with her. I've only told one person about this - a mutual friend and she says that my friend probably wouldn't be upset if I told her but that I need to tell her before she gets too involved with anyone because she really would be upset then. But I disagree - I think she would only she this as selfish and attention-seeking. I think about her all the time and I just want her to be happy, whoever she is with.

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Posts: 4456
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 14, 2005 07:47 PM         

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I think you should tell her how you feel. Never give up a chance to tell some one you love them. Life is too short.

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Posts: 1061
From: Hopelessly lost........
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 14, 2005 08:41 PM         

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I've decided I really want to tell her but I don't know how to present this in a way that isn't going to upset her or weird her out. Any ideas?

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Posts: 11943
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005

posted August 14, 2005 11:48 PM         

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Save it. Wait for a better time. Follow your gut. I think there's something to your trepidation.

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Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted August 15, 2005 08:21 AM         

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Wow, I don;t have much advice, other than.. You'll know when and if you should tell her.
Make sure she knows you love her and will support her and want her happy.... but perhaps you can leave out HOW much.
Be there.

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Posts: 4456
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 15, 2005 08:42 AM         

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I agree with AG and PIX. When you feel it is time, JUST DO IT!!! The best to you, Dorkus!!

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Posts: 1061
From: Hopelessly lost........
Registered: Jun 2003

posted August 15, 2005 04:21 PM         

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Thanks all I've decided I AM going to tell her, but when she is not in a relationship. That doesn't mean I am hoping for it to end, but I want to put it out there. And if she feels the same way, great. If she doesn't, well I got it off of my chest.

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Posts: 1973
From: New York City
Registered: Jul 2005

posted August 15, 2005 04:27 PM         

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Yes definitely tell her.

Good luck!

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Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted August 15, 2005 05:25 PM         

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Yes I would tell her, its not good to have secrets. She has a mind of her own and I'm sure she well follow her heart on this one. This way you can just be you, without all the games that secrets hold.

Solane Star

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Posts: 4456
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 15, 2005 06:54 PM         

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Love and Light to you Malorkus!!!

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