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Author
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Topic: Poor Astro Jokes
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Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted November 24, 2005 02:25 AM
 
What does an Aries eat to calm himself down?
Answer: MARSMELLOWS
Why are all kangaroos friends of Aries?
Answer: They are MARSuPiALS! Duh!
And then there was the Aries convict who escaped from the Libra cop, asking him to choose which handcuff should be put on first.
ADAM: ARIES. He ate the apple and then thought about the consequences.
EVE: SCORPIO. She got turned on by the apple and just had to stimulate Adam.
THE SNAKE: AQUARIUS with PISCES Ascendant. Who else would be more altruistic to gift us with the knowledge of Sex?
And then there was the Scorpio girl who chose to serve the Lord, so she joined a Monastery.
IP: Logged |
26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted November 24, 2005 02:29 AM
hahaha  IP: Logged |
26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted November 24, 2005 02:29 AM
Do Taurus! Do Taurus!IP: Logged |
BlueRoamer
Knowflake Posts: 3944
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003
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posted November 24, 2005 02:42 AM
What'd the man who had hemmorhoids say when he went to the doctor?Doctor help me I've got a Taurus!!! What'd the doctor say to the woman who was itching down there? Yup its vagittarius What do you call a pisces hiring his son over a stranger? Neptunism
Dont' even get me started on uranus! I have crossed the line. Sorry for stealing the idea, *slinks back into murky depths*
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26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted November 24, 2005 02:49 AM
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Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted November 24, 2005 04:15 AM
Man! BlueRoamer! Those were cool!
Write more Dude! This is "free for all", no restrictions. Lets see some Uranus pjs  26T, just wait, I am thinking up some good ones. Taurus is definitely on the menu IP: Logged |
Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted November 24, 2005 04:28 AM
3 girls were discussing their husbands and as usual the topic veered towards sex. The first one, a Cancerian, bragged, "My hubby is an Aries and sex with him reminds me of the song 'Love Machine'". The second gal, an Aquarius, mused, "My hubby is a Leo and our sex just brings the song 'Thriller" to my mind". The third one, a Scorpio, cooly said "My hubby is a Taurus. The only song that can describe his sex is 'Hotel California' ". The other two protested "But that is a weird song?", secretly happy that for once they outdid a Scorpio girl.
She happily explained "It's because of the lyrics. He checks in anytime he wants but he can never leave". IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 8591
From: former land of the leprechaun
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted November 24, 2005 08:49 AM
Dont know what you mean Iq.....Scorpio gals aint like that at all are they.......much......hahahahaha.... xxx IP: Logged |
Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted November 30, 2005 06:59 AM
And then there was the Scorpio virgin who had had only 3 men.[I cant have enough of prodding Scorpios foolish Aries Asc me LOL! ] ------------------
Sun-Cancer, Moon-Libra, Asc-ARIES, Mars-Taurus, Venus-Taurus, NorthNode-Libra. IP: Logged |
Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted November 30, 2005 07:05 AM
Q: Why do Scorpios like Police Work?
A: Because of the HandcuffsQ: Why do Scorpios hate hardcore pornography?
A: Because it is too boring Q: What is a short word for a Celibate Scorpio?
A: A Corpse Ok, enough Scorpio. Next I will try some for Cancer IP: Logged |
ScotScorp
Knowflake Posts: 936
From: St. Louis, Missouri
Registered: Aug 2004
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posted December 01, 2005 10:50 PM
Tasty Scorpio jokes!  IP: Logged |
26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted December 03, 2005 02:53 AM
.....still waiting!!! 
*tapping footIP: Logged |
WaterNymph
Knowflake Posts: 2276
From: London, UK
Registered: May 2005
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posted December 05, 2005 02:41 PM
lol
and after Cancer Pisces *in posh voice* it's only proper  IP: Logged |
Iqhunk
Knowflake Posts: 2132
From: Chennai
Registered: Oct 2005
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posted December 06, 2005 06:47 AM
Sorry to have kept you waiting lovely ladies, my city had been hired by the rain gods to be the next Venice. I did come up with some astro thoughts while wading though.
Due to lack of focus, I am mixing it all up and will try to see how far I can go without a comment at Scorpio girls.
1) Beware of sex with a horny Cancer Male. He might think it is too cosy like home and refuse to come out.
2) If you are a Scorpio girl , ignore point 1
[Did not manage to go too far ] 3) And then there was the Pisces drunkard who suddenly started abstaining from cocktails. He wanted to become a neat guy. 4) And then there was the Pisces teetotaller
who finally got an appointment to surgically separate his lips. 5) The surgeons are thinking of studying the condition in 4 to try out on Geminis and help reduce noise pollution 6) What is Libran Manufacturing known as?
A) Economies of Scale 7) How did Agent Smith finally capture Neo?
A) He uploaded a Libran Virus on him when Morpheus offered the Red Pill/Blue Pill choice. 8) How did Neo escape?
A) The Libran Virus took a small nap... 9) What happens when an Aquarian Dominatrix
encounters a Piscean submissive?
A) Nothing, the Domina forgot where she kept her whip. 10) What happens when a sadistic Piscean Dominatrix corners somebody?
A) Self Flagellation 11) The Men in Black exposed an Alien Sex Scandal in a triangular spacecraft. It was an Andromedan, a Reptilian and an Aquarian. 12) And then there was a Leo so upset with the quality of mirrors that he spent years to master Out of body experiences. 13) How do the International Atheletics
Anti Doping Agency find out about new drugs to ban?
A) They just test a Piscean weightlifter. IP: Logged |
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