|
Author
|
Topic: so cynical these days
|
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
|
posted December 17, 2005 06:23 PM
 
can anyone else relate to this, i wonder?i am so tired, so tired of searching for the answers; the answers to the meaning of life. trying to solve the puzzle use to make me tick, but now the fire within me has dried up. there is so much heart-breaking disillusion. deep down, i feel it would be so nice to have someone tell me all the answers, but i cannot allow myself to simply have 'blind faith'.
and philosophy, well, philosophy is just never-ending- it is like one giant web forever changing; sometimes it likes to look like it can show the way when really it has got me tangled up mentally within it once more. it is transient.
where is the eternal light? is it within? head or heart? love is blind too....... i cannot have blind faith.....so many of us believe firmly in different things.....we can't all be right.....sometimes praying is hard is there anyway to permantly stop the darkness of the mind that threatens to close in? so much pain in the world and i can't stop it; can't change it its like this savage garden; existence itself is vampyric
all i've ever truely wanted is for that bright, clear day...that place... where the lion and the lamb can be friends
no-one else i've ever met seems to understand my point of view....and no-one seems to hold all the answers right now, my soul seems to be crying out a little....but maybe i just have the winter blues i have become so cynical i have even apethetically given up living by some of my own rules/values- like veganism and finally even vegetarianism. i just don't know what to believe anymore.
i am sorry to waffle on like this......i realise no individual knowflake can miraculously solve my problems, provide me with the answers, or lift my burden- and i hate to be the gloomy one- but i guess it makes me feel better to harp on a little about it. the strong pluto aspect (moon conjunct)in my chart makes me plunge into and confront even the darkest areas of life. perhaps it is why i think too much.
times were easier when i was a child. it was much easier to have faith. easier to pray.
IP: Logged |
beebuddy
Knowflake Posts: 1072
From: illinois
Registered: Apr 2005
|
posted December 17, 2005 07:03 PM
"is there anyway to permantly stop the darkness of the mind that threatens to close in?"Watch thought, heed thought, whatever you want to call it, it's meditation. IP: Logged |
BlueRoamer
Knowflake Posts: 3944
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003
|
posted December 17, 2005 09:15 PM
Yep. I hear ya.  Remember that absorbing pain from the world around you is a choice, not an obligation.Your mind frames your reality. I have faith in this. I also have faith that somewhere there's an angel watching out for me. I think there is for you too. IP: Logged |
Nephthys
Moderator Posts: 3800
From: California
Registered: Oct 2001
|
posted December 18, 2005 07:31 PM
Dear Listens (EE) ~ You have forgotten what you already K-now 
You have forgotten what you are, where you came from.
You have forgotten because you are a great spiritual soul trapped in a human body, living on a spinning ball of illusion called earth. 
You are endless galaxies, made up of crystalline stars, full of knowledge and truth
Look at your username you have chosen; what does it tell you? 
I know, life is very challenging. My family and one of my friends have bad luck all the time. I am not just saying that. It is just one thing after another. But we will always be positive and hopeful; not let the dark forces take over.
Follow your heart  and listen to your inner wisdom........I know you know the answers.
Don't worry. You are surrounded by positive forces and spirits who will guide you. IP: Logged |
Gooberzlostlovefound
Knowflake Posts: 1205
From: and the embers never fade in your city by the lake
Registered: Jan 2002
|
posted December 19, 2005 02:24 AM
listens~YES!!!! This kind of reminds me of my thread in universal codes. I think I know exactly how you feel. IP: Logged |
Gooberzlostlovefound
Knowflake Posts: 1205
From: and the embers never fade in your city by the lake
Registered: Jan 2002
|
posted December 19, 2005 02:25 AM
by the way. I like your username.IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
|
posted December 19, 2005 05:37 AM
Thanks, guys  By the way, i am feeling somewhat better now- i had this winter bug which was making me feel tired and hence very low- i realise that now, and feel better. Things are getting clearer in my life too; sometimes there is fog all around me...but today it has lifted....some days are just clearer than others. You were right about our minds framing our own reality.....confidence/optimism is the key. Gooberzlostlovefound.....   IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
|
posted December 19, 2005 05:40 AM
NephthysThankyou for your beautiful words  IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Knowflake Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
|
posted December 19, 2005 08:53 AM
Oh heck yeah.........So, even if I don't have mindblowing answers or any inspiration for you, i've got empathy, and hey, sometimes it's just nice to be heard....
And believe me, I hear you! Glad you're feeling better. IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
|
posted December 19, 2005 01:33 PM
I like ya  I wish I could take my computer with me to my boyfriend's.....his doesn't work properly  nevermind IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
