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Author
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Topic: Divorce and children
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Focused Chi
Knowflake Posts: 83
From: A quiet place ignoring his 20' tall fire breathing EGO
Registered: Dec 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 12:31 PM
 
Hello everyone,My wife and I have decided the path of our marriage has come to and end. Without going into details our relationship was a necessary and interesting journey attached to karma. It is amazing how one changes/ evolves over time and experience. We are positive about the decision (I like to consider us rather evolved most of the time) We even went to counseling to be certain. We will remain wonderful friends and supportive of eachother. I have one great fear, aside from the financial stress of creating a second household *laughs thinking about the thread about the cancer man living with his X* That fear is for our little Leo girl. She is 3 and adores her mommy and daddy. Sometimes I want to wrap her soul in invulnerable armor to keep her protected forever. LOL Growing up I noticed a trend in the amount of kids with "problems" came from divorced familys. My logic keeps saying that is due to the negative environments they were raised in, but this cancer daddy is a little freaked out about what is to come. I will be moving out; details are still pending, but I plan to.......it will be painful....*takes a deep breath* just give my wife the house. I want this to be as easy as possible for my little girl. I plan to go to the book store to find something on the topic of divorce and children, but I have such great respect for the members of this site I would Greatly appreciate Any and All thoughts/input any of you would be kind enough to share on this subject. Thank You Focused Chi
Cancer/Sag/Gem ------------------
When I grow up I want to be Wise IP: Logged |
lotusheartone
Knowflake Posts: 238
From: MOther & Father GOd
Registered: Feb 2008
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posted January 19, 2006 12:48 PM
I congratulate both of you, you are both taking very good steps, remaining friends is so very important for your daughter
and you being there for her, can't be too far away
I think that is the biggest problem with divorce, the separating of family
when all should remain as family alwaysI left my X the house and everything in it
to start my new life with my two girls
forgiving and wishing the best
he could not be friends, it's too bad I'm glad to see, you will always be there for your daughter.. Sending you lots of Love.. IP: Logged |
lalalinda
Moderator Posts: 3291
From: nevada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 02:39 PM
all you can do is be honest and assure her that nothings changed, you love her even more now and just because you don't live together you are still a family and she is the most important thing in both of your lives. 
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Yang
Knowflake Posts: 2296
From: A temporary home
Registered: May 2004
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posted January 19, 2006 03:09 PM
So sorry to hear you are getting divorced!
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silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 04:41 PM
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silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 04:41 PM
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silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 04:41 PM
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silvermoon
Knowflake Posts: 324
From: Monterey Bay California
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted January 19, 2006 04:42 PM
I am so sorry to hear of your split.
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Total Pieces
Knowflake Posts: 291
From: Los Angeles, CA
Registered: Dec 2001
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posted January 19, 2006 07:58 PM
She'll be fine.My parents divorced when I was three. Once you have moved out completely tell her that you don't live with Mommy any more but you live...here and that 'here' is her home too. She'll be upset but she'll get over it. It is the one thing I still remember. My parents didn't tell me because I think they didn't know what to say. I still don't know why they divorced (I'm 37) I have asked through the years and I've always got the same answer. "It is between me and your mother/father We love you just the same" I've asked others but my parents both have strong wills. If they didn't tell me the rest of family cetainly wasn't. I never felt it was my fault or that I could put it right because they told me they loved me all the time and they never,ever spoke badly about each other to me, I was never put in the middle...and for my parents that is saying something  You all will be just fine IP: Logged |
thirteen
Knowflake Posts: 1107
From: Rochester Hills, MI USA
Registered: May 2004
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posted January 20, 2006 02:25 PM
The best thing you can do for kids is teach them to have their own identity, teach them and show them how to have good self esteem and they can handle anything life has to offer them. Don't put them on a pedastel out of guilt because life won't keep them up there and then it will hurt them even more when life knocks them down to earth.
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CancerianMoon
Knowflake Posts: 1082
From: Sydney, Australia. Cancer Sun.....Gemini Moon.....Aqua Rising
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted January 20, 2006 03:59 PM
I applaude you both..i think with the amount of thought and care you and your wife are putting into this the only concerns you will have with regards to your daughter will be the usual childhood/teenage things 
I personally know a cancer dad of 2 children..and they live interstate(with the mum)..he is the BEST father..the kids know they are loved and are very secure because of that..take heart and continue smiling..i think you'll do just fine!!!  IP: Logged |
Focused Chi
Knowflake Posts: 83
From: A quiet place ignoring his 20' tall fire breathing EGO
Registered: Dec 2005
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posted January 21, 2006 08:32 AM
Thank you one and all for your responses. : )Total Pieces, CancerianMoon & Lotusheartone You three especially made me feel better. ------------------
When I grow up I want to be Wise IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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