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Author Topic:   Zen of Sarcasm
Heart--Shaped Cross
Knowflake

Posts: 7178
From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 04, 2007 07:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Heart--Shaped Cross     Edit/Delete Message
Zen of Sarcasm

01. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
02. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
03. Its always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
04. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
05. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
06. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
07. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
08. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
09. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.
12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.
19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

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naiad
Knowflake

Posts: 1645
From:
Registered: Sep 2006

posted July 04, 2007 08:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for naiad     Edit/Delete Message
nice to see you in good spirits.

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ListensToTrees
Knowflake

Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005

posted July 05, 2007 03:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ListensToTrees     Edit/Delete Message
Haha! Excellent! Where did you find this?

quote:
08. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

quote:
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
That one is my favorite!

quote:
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Ironic, eh? Hehe.

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SattvicMoon
Knowflake

Posts: 2282
From:
Registered: May 2007

posted July 05, 2007 05:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SattvicMoon     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

I hear you!

------------------
Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak,
sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go

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Solane Star
Knowflake

Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted July 05, 2007 08:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Solane Star     Edit/Delete Message
05. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

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Bluemoon
Knowflake

Posts: 4456
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted July 05, 2007 10:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message

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SunChild
Moderator

Posts: 4032
From: Australia
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2007 10:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SunChild     Edit/Delete Message

------------------
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

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BlueRoamer
Knowflake

Posts: 3944
From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean
Registered: Jun 2003

posted July 05, 2007 01:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message
I, of course, like this one:

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

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Highly_Inflammable
Knowflake

Posts: 330
From: some where far and forgotten
Registered: Apr 2007

posted July 05, 2007 02:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Highly_Inflammable     Edit/Delete Message
.... jokes apart, hand on my heart ....


I truely believe these..... Voice of WISDOM..

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them


.............

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fayte.m
Knowflake

Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted July 05, 2007 03:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for fayte.m     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

------------------
~Judgement Must Be Balanced With Compassion~
~Do Not Seek Wealth From The Suffering, Or The Dire Needs Of Others~
~Assumption Is The Bane Of Understanding~
~ if you keep doing what you did, you'll keep getting what you got.~
}><}}}(*> <*){{{><{
~~~ ~~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~
~~~~~ ~~~ ~~~~ ~~~

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libraschoice7
Knowflake

Posts: 1976
From: Arizona
Registered: Jul 2006

posted July 06, 2007 04:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for libraschoice7     Edit/Delete Message
That was funny HSC I'll have to remember the one about not taking sleeping pills and laxatives at the same time lol! Also "If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments." True

------------------
Sun in Libra
Moon in Cancer
Jupiter in Cancer
Venus in Virgo
Mars in Cancer
Ascendant in Cancer

I "FEEL" therefor I am

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26taurus
Knowflake

Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004

posted July 06, 2007 05:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
i sent these to my Dad and he sent it back with his "answers".

here's a couple:

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
Truth is how you see it too be.

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
True... you may **** on your dreams.

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Heart--Shaped Cross
Knowflake

Posts: 7178
From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 06, 2007 08:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Heart--Shaped Cross     Edit/Delete Message
26, he's a clever guy.

And he's certainly right about the first one.

Come to think of it, if our perceptions are changing,
we may forget, and have to remember, the "truth" we have spoken in the past.

Or, I guess, we could just say,
"I don't know what I said then, but I see it differently now."


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fayte.m
Knowflake

Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted July 06, 2007 09:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for fayte.m     Edit/Delete Message
I don't get it.
If one tells the truth/a fact, then how can it change?
It is either truth or it is not truth no matter how one desires it to be.
For example, I would not lie about my age. I have known folks who do and then forget what they told someone.
Why would one want to lie?
It is easy to remember truth based on facts.
Why weave a tangled web of deception?
TRUTH is truth...and it cannot be otherwise.

truth (n)

Synonyms: fact, certainty, reality, actuality, veracity, verity

Antonym: untruth


Synonyms: reality, fact, accuracy, genuineness, precision, exactness, legitimacy, veracity, truthfulness

Antonym: untruthfulness


Synonyms: honesty, candour, integrity, dedication, loyalty, devotion, fidelity, uprightness, sincerity

Antonym: dishonesty

------------------
~Judgement Must Be Balanced With Compassion~
~Do Not Seek Wealth From The Suffering, Or The Dire Needs Of Others~
~Assumption Is The Bane Of Understanding~
~ if you keep doing what you did, you'll keep getting what you got.~
}><}}}(*> <*){{{><{
~~~ ~~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~
~~~~~ ~~~ ~~~~ ~~~

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SunChild
Moderator

Posts: 4032
From: Australia
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 06, 2007 10:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SunChild     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
True... you may **** on your dreams.

LMAO...reminds me of my dads humor...he's a sag...lol

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Mirandee
Knowflake

Posts: 4812
From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer
Registered: Sep 2004

posted July 07, 2007 01:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mirandee     Edit/Delete Message
That's very true, Fayte. Although I can't speak for HSC, I think he was speaking about truth in a different sense than telling the truth as opposed to lying.

I think he was speaking about what we may hold to be the truth about certain things such as spirituality, philosophy or our world views for example.

Theories, ideas, thoughts can change. Normally they change with the growth of the person and their knowledge.

In that case, I would agree that truth in that sense could change. What we hold to be the truth about certain things can change on further evidence to the contrary. For instance long, long ago people believed it was true that the world was flat. That was proven to be inaccurate so their truth changed due to the evidence that proved them wrong. They acqired more knowledge regarding the world.

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26taurus
Knowflake

Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004

posted July 07, 2007 05:23 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
SunChild,
my Dad's a Gemini. Opposite of Sag. He's a writer, a poet. Good sense of humor.

quote:
Or, I guess, we could just say,
"I don't know what I said then, but I see it differently now."

Thanks, HSC. I often say that to myself.

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26taurus
Knowflake

Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004

posted July 07, 2007 05:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Mirandee,

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fayte.m
Knowflake

Posts: 9809
From: Still out looking for Schrödinger's cat. fayte1954@hotmail.com
Registered: Mar 2005

posted July 07, 2007 11:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for fayte.m     Edit/Delete Message
Mirandee
quote:
Theories, ideas, thoughts can change. Normally they change with the growth of the person and their knowledge.

In that case, I would agree that truth in that sense could change.



I see what you are saying but those are beliefs not truths(true facts). Yes one can choose to call a belief, a philosophy, a theory, etcetera, a truth, but is is not necessarily a fact nor true/truth. It is opinion, hope, choice, a belief, theory, but not a truth/true/fact.
Truth, like the word love, has become imbued with meanings not of either in the pure sense of definitions.
truth (n)

Synonyms: fact, certainty, reality, actuality, veracity, verity

Antonym: untruth


Synonyms: reality, fact, accuracy, genuineness, precision, exactness, legitimacy, veracity, truthfulness

Antonym: untruthfulness


Synonyms: honesty, candour, integrity, dedication, loyalty, devotion, fidelity, uprightness, sincerity

Antonym: dishonesty

------------------
~Judgement Must Be Balanced With Compassion~
~Do Not Seek Wealth From The Suffering, Or The Dire Needs Of Others~
~Assumption Is The Bane Of Understanding~
~ if you keep doing what you did, you'll keep getting what you got.~
}><}}}(*> <*){{{><{
~~~ ~~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~
~~~~~ ~~~ ~~~~ ~~~

IP: Logged

Mirandee
Knowflake

Posts: 4812
From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer
Registered: Sep 2004

posted July 07, 2007 11:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mirandee     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
I see what you are saying but those are beliefs not truths(true facts). Yes one can choose to call a belief, a philosophy, a theory, etcetera, a truth, but is is not necessarily a fact nor true/truth. It is opinion, hope, choice, a belief, theory, but not a truth/true/fact.
Truth, like the word love, has become imbued with meanings not of either in the pure sense of definitions.
truth (n)

I see what you are saying too, Fayte.

We do call any beliefs we hold to be truth and some of those beliefs never change, like for instance, that there is one God.

There are truths and there are our truths. There is only one Absolute Truth and that is God.

We do tend to misuse or misinterpret words. Through time meanings of words have changed for that reason. We also do that with the word "judge" It does not across the board mean to condemn. In fact we make judgments on everything in our everyday lives. We judge situations, we judge what the weather will be on any given day, we judge what looks good and what doesn't. We judge everything and we couldn't survive without making those assessments. We can even judge the character of another person through their words and actions without condemning them. Judge means to make an assessment, to determine. Condemnation is a whole different thing and it is the latter that Jesus was speaking of but the word "judge" has taken on new connotations in the past 2000 or so years since Jesus' time.

So I agree that you are right about our misuse of the words "love" and "truth." Good point.

Although, I still think that just for the reasons you gave - because it is just a hope, a belief we hold, a theory or opinion that we may call "truth" at any given time in our lives - it can change on further knowledge of the facts or evidence that makes us think a different way about it.

You are very right though in what you said about what we call "truths." There is my truth at any given time, the truth that others hold and then there is the real or Absolute Truth. Absolute Truth never changes. It can't change. But no human being holds any Absolute Truth. Only God does.

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Mirandee
Knowflake

Posts: 4812
From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer
Registered: Sep 2004

posted July 07, 2007 11:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mirandee     Edit/Delete Message
I love it when we spiral like this Fayte.

We do this often in email and I run up the phone bill and get yelled at when we talk. LOL

Star has the same effect regarding spiraling and I am so blessed to have you both in my life.

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26taurus
Knowflake

Posts: 13411
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004

posted December 16, 2007 08:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Déjà vu

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