posted February 21, 2008 08:04 PM         

i've been looking at a few websites giving ways to cope with grief after a relative's suicide. there's a lot of support out there and i hope you have the strengh to look for it. otherwise just ask.

also, i've read here and there that breathing technics are excellent to control your flow of emotions. i don't know anything about it so i can't help you on that one but hopefully, among all the knowflakes, some will have som knowledge and will share with you.

guys, any breathing technics to deal with unconsolable pain when it arises?

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm
this page is general and deals with grief for a loved one.

http://nvo.com/isleepless/helpwithgriefandmourning/
this page is really good. it's long but very clear. very practical and straight to the point. though it's not specifically concerned with suicide but with loss in general. you should read it!

http://www.afsp.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.viewpage&page_id=279BBF77-9100 -1893-6E42CC9A1A1777BA
this page is about suicide and how survivors can cope.

http://www.mypharmacy.co.uk/health_books/books/c/coping_with_suicide.htm
this is a link to a book dealing specifically with suicide. called "coping with suicide" by maggie helen

http://www.chooselife.net/nmsruntime/saveasdialog.asp?lID=1063&sID=1184
this page is a pdf file and talks about grief in general and suicide. 17 pages.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/suicide/MH00048
this article is called:
Suicide: Coping when a loved one takes their life

http://www.cmha.ca/bins/content_page.asp?cid=3-101-103
this is the canadian mental health association. this page talks about suicide. they must have links and other info available.

posted February 21, 2008 08:46 PM         

Viola... Battle Of Evermore... I too, will be more than happy to assist in any way you may need.
Please know that you are in our hearts and prayers right now...
We look forward to your return as soon as you are comfortably able.

Here's A Great Breathing Technique

posted February 22, 2008 11:34 AM         

i didn't find much but may be i missed the good links. i found one link posted by BEEBUDDY. it's about breathing but not necessarily for your situation. i thought it could help though:
http://www.yogasite.com/pranayama.htm

i also found a thread by GeminiLover75 with relaxing music. i couldn't check if it's appopriate before to post it, because i'm in the library right now!
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum3/HTML/001938.html

i'll google breathing technics this weekend and come back with more stuff to help you take it all in.

just know that some people think of you right now... so take everything they give you with no fears or embarassement. i'm flooding you with links because out of the number, there should be one or two that really help. and that's my aim.

posted February 23, 2008 10:47 AM         

But knowing your love of the guitar as a healing instrument will post some SRV.

And this instrumental-> youtube.com/watch?v=4BLzwvYHSwc&feature=related

posted February 23, 2008 11:18 AM         

Little Wing jam along ..

E minor / G / A minor / E minor ..
B minor .. slide down to A minor .. the a qick hit on C .. then ..
G / F / C / D ..

repeat untill bored .. ;-)

as i can't watch yootoob vids .. and don't have SRV s version .. no idea if he's playing in that key ..
but .. that's how the hamsters play it ..

Amazing Grace .. in G major .. mpthree audio doc. .. about 5 meg. ..
~ ( edit 11th march .. file now off server ) ~
( my all-time favourite melody .. and comforting in times of stress .. i.m.h.o. )

played in D major .. using the open D string as a drone ..
i.e. using the open D string and playing the melody on the G string ..
it will sound somewhat like the bagpipe version recorded in the 60's ..

posted February 23, 2008 02:12 PM         

Ri P-aradise is such a finely nuanced song. And the original recording had a beautifully fine piano break, in perfect counterpoint to Steve.

posted February 26, 2008 04:14 PM         

The men of Rohan were patrolling their borders, where upon they came across a band of Orcs, who were making, their way back to Mordor with two Hobbits (Merry & Pippin) that they had captured. The brave young men of Rohan fell upon the Orcs and battle commenced until all the Orcs were slain The inspiration for this painting came from the Led Zeppelin song “The Battle of Evermore”

posted February 29, 2008 12:03 AM         

I am doing ok, I guess. I'm just trying not to think about it as much... I am sorry that my dad was always unhappy and emotionally disturbed. He could have done a lot with himself. He was bipolar and had an almost photograpic memory. He played guitar as well. We had a lot of things in common, but he hurt me so much that I was too proud to call him even when I secretly wanted to. I am very sorry for that stupidity on my part now. He did some nice things for me, but he was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and I resented him for that. I guess it's stupid to be sorry now though.

Thanks for your support and the videos and pictures and links you gave me. You guys are great friends. **hugs to you all**

Blurry pictures- RIP, Dad

In college with my mom

posted February 29, 2008 12:12 PM         

quote:

---

I was too proud to call him even when I secretly wanted to. I am very sorry for that stupidity on my part now.

---

quote:

---

I guess it's stupid to be sorry now though.

---

your words still echoes in me....

i wonder if there's a right way to react.... it's ok if you feel sorry, and it's ok if you think you are being stupid too. it's also ok if you don't think you are being stupid.

if you feel somehow responsible it's probably because you are trying to look for some reasons that could have pushed him to do what he did. cause what he did is generally unusual, so there's a need to rationalise and find a reason that pushed him to do it. a reason, an act, a word, a person.... something that could explain this act.
i personally beleive that to accept something like that and try to not find reasons or causes but take the event as it is, will help.
because we love someone, we can easily try to make ourselves guilty so as to take their own responsability on our shoulders. to kind of take the load off from them, we accept to bear it, to be responsible (or partly). but if you can avoid doing it, your wounds will heal as well (they will heal as well if you take on some form of responsability), but later with time, the universe will let you understand why this happened. in time. because you'll have healed and transformed this pain in strengh.

posted February 29, 2008 12:25 PM         

To cut a long story short, he nearly died (of a heart attack) recently, but he had a very profound out of body experience, and now both he and his wife are no longer afraid.

Your father's soul lives on forever, Battle Of Evermore. I'm feeling emotional myself as I'm writing this. Because its so true.

He is free now, from the chemical depression in which he suffered.

I know he made a mistake, but we all do. Sometimes life just beats us down. Sometimes we are more vulnerable than others.

Tolstoy- "To understand all is to forgive all".

Its alright.
Everything is going to be alright.

Love.
Love is all.
Love is all that really matters.

I hope these words help to bring some comfort.